Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Threesome with 2 HB8-9's from SA

sazc

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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Bible_Belt

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It's pretty obvious
The "con" in con man stands for confidence. You have to bolster the mark's confidence first, then that makes him easy to separate from his money.

Like I said, I'm glad you had fun. I'm not trying to moral-shame you for buying hookers. But like other people here are trying to tell you, you're delusional to believe anything a working girl tells you.
 

sazc

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The only places that I don't seem like everyone else is the bar or club.

Perhaps these places are fake? Perhaps people put on fake personalities when they go to these places?
No, the reason you hate the bars and clubs is because you do lack social skills and have already admitted that your mood changes when you drink, and not for the better.

If you really want to crawl out of your self imposed cave, you need to stay sober for the next 5 years and work on yourself. You can re evaluate the alcohol situation after that.

People who drink and get angry, and uncontrollably angrily mutter to themselves, and lack the self control to stop muttering to the point of being thrown out of a bar, don't need to drink at all. Seriously.

Step 1, stop drinking
Step 2 read, learn, listen
Step 3 apply
Step 4 work out at least five days a week to help with your mood
Step 5 grow as a human being

That's how it works buddy
 
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Atom Smasher

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I appreacite the response from you sir. There’s a few things I’d like to point out. If you wouldn’t mind AND when you have time please showcase(in private messages) where I’ve benefited from this leniency.

Secondly as you can see. I’ve ceased to interact with Richard. Does not mean I’m blind and don’t constantly see the forum filled with these trash posts.

I would also expect to have a more broad wiggle room. Check the track record I’ve consistently provided valuable information and advice. Numbers don’t lie

Also telling me how a REAL man acts and that REAL men ignore others and their bull**** is bull****. There are real men who deal by ignoring and deflecting. There are others who deal with situations head on. There’s no rigid way to being a man
You certainly DO have more wiggle room, hence my letting more slide.

My point would be that this isn't a "situation". There all all sorts of types and personalities on a public forum, and when we engage with those whom we have little respect for, we always end up sinking to a less than stellar level in terms of arguing. I think it's all too easy to assign too much importance to this place and to get too invested. The whole thing is rather comical when you detach and realize that this place consists of a bunch of anonymous guys, each with an established persona, trading ideas and advancing the community at best, and spinning wheels in arguments at worst. None of it is all that important.

For myself, if I get emotionally tied up in conversations, I can't leverage this place to my advantage and use it the way I desire to.
 
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No, the reason you hate the bars and clubs is because you do lack social skills and have already admitted that your mood changes when you drink, and not for the better.

If you really want to crawl out of your self imposed cave, you need to stay sober for the next 5 years and work on yourself. You can re evaluate the alcohol situation after that.

People who drink and get angry, and uncontrollably angrily mutter to themselves, and lack the self control to stop muttering to the point of being thrown out of a bar, don't need to drink at all. Seriously.

Step 1, stop drinking
Step 2 read, learn, listen
Step 3 apply
Step 4 work out at least five days a week to help with your mood
Step 5 grow as a human being

That's how it works buddy
It's not worth it to put that much effort to impress them. The girls at bars are no less of wh0res than the ones I met at that apartment. I'm supposed to go on a lifelong mission of sobriety to impress girls that drink themselves?

At bars, even when girls ask me questions about something I could be potentially interested in, such as what do I do for a living, I just give them one word answers and am disinterested in having a conversation with them.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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sazc

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The whole thing is rather comical when you detach and realize that this place consists of a bunch of anonymous guys, each with an established persona, trading ideas and advancing the community at best, and spinning wheels in arguments at worst. None of it is all that important
Word

Keep the wisdom that resonates, ignore the noise, refuse to engage the garbage.
 

sazc

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It's not worth it to put that much effort to impress them. The girls at bars are no less of wh0res than the ones I met at that apartment. I'm supposed to go on a lifelong mission of sobriety to impress girls that drink themselves?

At bars, even when girls ask me questions about something I could be potentially interested in, such as what do I do for a living, I just give them one word answers and am disinterested in having a conversation with them.
No, your supposed to put your health FIRST, stay sober, and figure out your sh1t.

You walk around these boards, whining, moaning and groaning about woeful you, but you won't help yourself.

You realize that, if you didn't have that angry-drunk- always-a-victim-in-life personna, you would have no identity. You wild be LOST.

You say you hate it yet you cling to, and justify, standing still in it.

We're you molested as a child? How long have you gotten a payoff for playing the angry-victim role? Daddy and Mommy respond to it, don't they?

You'll never change what you don't own.
 
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guru1000

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It's not worth it to put that much effort to impress them. The girls at bars are no less of wh0res than the ones I met at that apartment. I'm supposed to go on a lifelong mission of sobriety to impress girls that drink themselves?
If they're worthless, why bang them?

If you have a desire to fvck them, then they have value (to you). But if they won't fvck you for free, then you have little value to offer.

Get it?


Thus, you need to get better so you have value (other than paying them) to offer.
 
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If they're worthless, why bang them?

If you have a desire to fvck them, then they have value (to you). But if they won't fvck you for free, then you have little value to offer.

Get it?


Thus, you need to get better so you have value (other than paying them) to offer.
What do you, or anyone, offer other than that?

You mentioned your looks and ambition as to why some girls like you. That's it? How could ambition be better than actual money? That certainly makes no sense, especially at your age.

And your suggestions to improve were all aesthetic, but most places I've gone to have suggested not doing facial fillers.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sazc

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What do you, or anyone, offer other than that?

You mentioned your looks and ambition as to why some girls like you. That's it? How could ambition be better than actual money? That certainly makes no sense, especially at your age.

And your suggestions to improve were all aesthetic, but most places I've gone to have suggested not doing facial fillers.
I'm willing to bet that most men on this site can offer empathy, companionship, the ability to emotionally connect on a deeper level than surface, engaging conversation, support, levity, a sounding board, being interested, genuine concern, attention, admiration on some levels, etc.

Either they can offer it, or they know how to fake it well, if it doesn't come naturally.

There's the beginning if your list. Get to tackling.
 

sazc

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And don't try and slither out of answering my direct question.

When, exactly, in your childhood, did you realize that being defiant and playing the victim had huge payoffs for you?

You found that role combination and ran with it, for life.

I recall you posting that you got framed for stalking and went to jail... You victim you, be angry about that, eh?

My uncle got framed for running pounds of pot accross state lines. Grandma says he was railroaded because he was only there to "inspect the merchandise" .

I've heard all the stories.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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And don't try and slither out of answering my direct question.

When, exactly, in your childhood, did you realize that being defiant and playing the victim had huge payoffs for you?

You find that role combination and ran with it, for life.

I recall you posting that you got framed for stalking and went to jail... You victim you, be angry about that, eh?

My uncle got framed for running pounds of pot accross state lines. Grandma says he was railroaded because he was only there to "inspect the merchandise" .

I've heard all the stories.
I never said I got framed for anything, so I don't even know what you're talking about.
 

guru1000

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If I knew, I wouldn't be on this forum, would I?

Several days ago, I thought flying to Vietnam to have my legs broken would solve my issues, but that sounds ridiculous now.
Do you think you're sane? Or you know something is a little off?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

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