Guys i just got brutally rejected...how do i bounce back from it?

[Earlhickey]

Plate who i really like and she seems to really like me

She is kinda slutty and "issues", ya i should have known better i guess

I go over to hang

She is messaging on her phone

She straight up tells me "sorry i gotta go" and she's going to a dudes house.

.....

I mean....

There's rejection and then there's rejection

How the **** do i get past this mentally?

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Plate who i really like and she seems to really like me

She doesn't 'really' like you. You are a plate to her, as much as she is to you. Except, she's not really a 'plate' to you, because you actually 'really like' her. Prey tell me, how many other 'plates' do you have?

Though that is sh!tty behaviour, let this be a lesson in trusting your gut and not investing heavily in people before they have prven they deserve it. You thought she was bad news, and she is. You are responsible for you own perceptions and behaviours.

How to bounce back? Be rid of this d!ickhead, find other women, and be a bit more trusting of your instincts. Also, quit being such an soppy emotional snowflake about women.

 

[Desdinova]

She straight up tells me "sorry i gotta go" and she's going to a dudes house.

Let's see what you did wrong...

- Failure to initiate kino
- Failure to initiate playful flirting
- Failure to take her out on a real date
- Failure to kiss her
- Failure to fvck her

You're just an orbiter. She uses you for male attention and nothing more. The other guy has likely done at least one of the things I listed above and is therefore more interesting than you.

Learn from this and take action ASAP next time.

 

[Earlhickey]

Let's see what you did wrong...

- Failure to initiate kino
- Failure to initiate playful flirting
- Failure to take her out on a real date
- Failure to kiss her
- Failure to fvck her

You're just an orbiter. She uses you for male attention and nothing more. The other guy has likely done at least one of the things I listed above and is therefore more interesting than you.

Learn from this and take action ASAP next time.

We have actually done all of that...

That's why this was out of left field

 

[bigneil]

You went over to hang? Did you bring a bottle of wine? Anything?

How is that rejection "brutal"? The only brutal rejection is in your mind. I told my last girl 6 months ago "You can never reject me, you can only inspire me to improve until I eventually overwhelm you" and she replied "I'm seeing that!" That was when she started saying "I love you". She left me 5 months later, but I have a younger girl on her way over today, because I lost 10 pounds (i.e., improved).

Rejection is NEVER out of left field. When my girl left in late June, I traced the problem back 14 weeks to (I approximated) when things started going south.

Why doesn't OP have another girl if his girl does? In all likelihood, because young women have power and young men have no power. What is brutal is that OP have to face reality and realize the only way he scores is to get lucky.

 

[Billtx49]

Did she know you were coming over?
At any rate you weren't her main priority at that point in time for some reason. Consider it a wake up call.

 

[bigneil]

This will happen with every girl at some point. I used to think I could have a grand gesture, if I could only get her on the phone, if I could only stop by her house or work and see her again she'd remember how attracted she was. If I could just convince her that I'd change for her. And it never worked, even once. They would project "get away from me" vibe and it was devastating. I might have groveled for sex and got laid one last time but she would be disgusted.

Then I realized that when this happens you MUST seamlessly switch to the next girl. If you can't get another girl like her, then guess what? That is why she left you. Girls want what other girls want. At some point in the future (at an unknown, unquantifiable, random time), right around when you have a better girl, your last girl will come back to you and suddenly be all romantic again. Unless you freaked her out at the time in which case she's gone forever.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Dam you guys are brutal.

Ask you self what you would prefer:

-Ass-kissing platitudes, sympathies, things you want to hear about things you can't control.
-Honest, 'brutal' truths about things you can control, things you don't necessarily like, but those that will change the way you think and behave for the better in future.

I'd much rather the blunt honesty than the romantic sympathy. But then, I have thicker skin than some others.

 

[Earlhickey]

Did she know you were coming over?
At any rate you weren't her main priority at that point in time for some reason. Consider it a wake up call.

Yes, she asked me to.

I dont mind the brutal talk guys, i know you are right, i did **** things up by being too passive about stuff.

it's more just the humiliation aspect of it than anything else

 

[bigneil]

Ask you self what you would prefer:

-Ass-kissing platitudes, sympathies, things you want to hear about things you can't control.
-Honest, 'brutal' truths about things you can control, things you don't necessarily like, but those that will change the way you think and behave for the better in future.

I'd much rather the blunt honesty than the romantic sympathy. But then, I have thicker skin than some others.

He wanted Cosmo.

 

[Billtx49]

Yes, she asked me to.

I dont mind the brutal talk guys, i know you are right, i did **** things up by being too passive about stuff.

it's more just the humiliation aspect of it than anything else

Probably her way of doing a dump by making you aware of the new guy in as non confrontational a way as possible. Seen it done before with younger women. Sometimes the men 'accidentally' meet each other in her proximity.

 

[wifehunter]

Walk

 

[SmooveMooves]

She left you to go get fūcked by another dude? Sucks.

How do you get over it? You...move on. I wouldn't even be giving it second thought, she's a slut and you knew that.

Move on to other women and ignore her. Do not meet her again. An Infringement like that can't be forgiven.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Find. better. quality. woman.

 

[RedZone]

Hey man that's not a pleasant rejection, but I had worse (I'm sure most have). Just forget about her and move on.

 

[MatureDJ]

You call her a "plate", but she considers you an orbitor.

I think a lot of guys here use the word "plate" to describe a woman that they have talked to in the past, would like to get with, but nothing has yet happened.

 

[nismo-4]

She's not a plate unless sex is involved.

Yeah, delete her from all platforms and block her. Next find a new chick.

Never stop improving. Don't go near this one again unless you want to be a major orbiter.

Case closed.

 

[Thorninmyside]

You didn't get dumped. You got paroled from AFC prison. Enjoy it!

 

[Earlhickey]

You call her a "plate", but she considers you an orbitor.

I think a lot of guys here use the word "plate" to describe a woman that they have talked to in the past, would like to get with, but nothing has yet happened.

We have had sex, but it was a few weeks ago and i didn't persue after that because i was talking to my ex at the time so i think that may be what killed her IL, i dunno

but regardless i am already getting over it, it just killed the old ego at the time.

 

[Billtx49]

i didn't persue after that because i was talking to my ex at the time so i think that may be what killed her IL

And the plot thickens. You had an outside interest and she got one also.
If you go half azz with a girl, don't be surprised if she treats you the same way.
Forget Ex's and always give 100% of your attention to your present.