Finally, finally get it

[jimjam]

Hey everyone.

Wanted to write that I finally understand the inherint danger of messing around with NPD women. Nothing heartbteaking happened to me and I'm not gonna rehash the whole saga. Some of you may remember. Suffice to say that I distanced myself emotionally and observed her actions, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Sure enough it did. I laid down a boundary, she didnt like it and immediately withdrew from me. It was actuallt interesting to observe. She went from lovey dovey to non present in the snap of a finger.

Anyway, wanted to thank those of you who tried to help me with this. I finally see how empty, sick and dangerous these people are. I can only liken this awakening to an alkie's moment of clarity. I don't think one can fully understand unless you"ve been there

 

[Polysix]

Well bone bro! Welcome back to the bright side of the force Jedi-Knight!

 

[jimjam]

Thanks.

In a way, it's almost sad to see somone like this. But i'm also grateful it happened. I learned a lot and I know that I can finally leave it all behind me. Feels good. Like finally paying off a years old, past due and high interest bill.

 

[Prime_Beef]

Just think, that could have been a high interest continuing payment..with a balloon payment at the end!

 

[Billtx49]

I don't think one can fully understand unless you"ve been there

That's right. It's eventually like emotional abuse on steroids from her directed at you. Men that have only dated normal women have no clue until they get snagged by a disordered one.
Reading about it is one thing, living through it is completely different.

 

[BeExcellent]

Good for you! Glad you recognized the pathology before it sucked you in.

 

[btownbuck2012]

Thanks.

In a way, it's almost sad to see somone like this. But i'm also grateful it happened. I learned a lot and I know that I can finally leave it all behind me. Feels good. Like finally paying off a years old, past due and high interest bill.

Yeah I experienced and am experiencing similar. At first you're tore up but as time goes on you realize what it was exactly you were dealing with and almost tend to feel sorry for them.

 

[jimjam]

They do Hoover sometimes but mercifully not as long as the BPDs.

NPDs are tough though, they're one of the types that are easy to be tricked by again and again where as a BPD or HPD is way more obvious to avoid.

My ex wife was BPD.....NEVER again

 

[exhausted]

Yep just got rid of a NPD.

My God these women have no regard or feeling for anyone but themselves.

They take no responsibility or acknowledgement of their mistakes and instead get mad at YOU for not letting them off the hook to get away with terrible things.

NPD also princess syndrome.
Single child syndrome.
Spoiled brat that never grew up syndrome.

They are like emotional vampires that kill your soul.

 

[jimjam]

Whatever it is, I'm just glad I'm free. Definitly tough, though. They have a way of crawling inside of you and attaching themselves. Its weird, scary. I'm just trying to stay limited contact. Can't go full on no contact cuz of our son. That and trying to determine what it is about me that attracts these types of women.

Like I said, ex wife....BPD. This one.....NPD. All LTRs in my life have been nuts. Tired of it.

 

[exhausted]

Whatever it is, I'm just glad I'm free. Definitly tough, though. They have a way of crawling inside of you and attaching themselves. Its weird, scary. I'm just trying to stay limited contact. Can't go full on no contact cuz of our son. That and trying to determine what it is about me that attracts these types of women.

Like I said, ex wife....BPD. This one.....NPD. All LTRs in my life have been nuts. Tired of it.

Mine too except about 6 str, under a year or around a year.

I've been studying, we attract these NPD nut jobs because we are caring and kind and they crave kindness and caring towards them without ever returning it. Personalities attract. They just take take take and most mature men work hard and care for their families and stride to be appreciated.
I like being appreciated and doing well in all aspects in life. NPDs barely ever appreciate anything and keep us striving to work harder for that kindness until we have just been beat down enough to walk away.

They are truly terrible vampires. The dumb **** they say and do is ridiculous. I asked mine once if she ever pays attention to the dumb ridiculous things she says and if she is just truly lacking all shame and self respect. No answer.

 

[resilient]

One of the best things you can do in these kind of situations is ask yourself if you're a people pleaser and why? Often this attraction scenario replays repressed childhood issues that lacked the proper healthy nurturing needed to develop a healthy self esteem.

These toxic women will allow themselves to get "attached" to the man for a while but then will discard when complacency kicks in and an outsider orbiter is pressing in hard on the vulnerable relationship to convince her to jump branches. Sometimes that doesn't take much. These type are seducers and are damn good at their charm. New partners always tap their need to sharpen / perfect that charm... Also, watch for impulsive behavior. If they are satisfied with what they have and have simple things, to me that's positive and healthy. If they always have to be going on vacation, go out every single night, driving around town for some concert, comedy show, movie premiere, etc. ....be wary.

To avoid types like these in the future.... spot the red flags early... before you're invested emotionally and physically -- and run as fast as you can. Some can smash and dash or pump and dump with experienced game. For the most part though... after the lay... self-control becomes that much harder (especially if the sex is good).

It's a tight rope to walk... but one that must be walked to navigate around them and avoid a LTR with.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

These 'toxic' women must be miserable. No doubt, that is a large part of the reason they are looking for sex... to escape from themselves. If only men would next' them, it might force them to face up to themselves.....

 

[exhausted]

These 'toxic' women must be miserable. No doubt, that is a large part of the reason they are looking for sex... to escape from themselves. If only men would next' them, it might force them to face up to themselves.....

with fb and the nonstop amount of ***** orbiters there is no reason for a woman to be great, honorable and prideful in her behavior and keeping a man. They dont give a **** because there are 30 pathetic losers already waiting for a chance with her.
Its like todays bs pusssy participation trophy, you get rewarded for just being alive whether you are any good or not. Then generation of pathetic

 

[exhausted]

One of the best things you can do in these kind of situations is ask yourself if you're a people pleaser and why? Often this attraction scenario replays repressed childhood issues that lacked the proper healthy nurturing needed to develop a healthy self esteem.

These toxic women will allow themselves to get "attached" to the man for a while but then will discard when complacency kicks in and an outsider orbiter is pressing in hard on the vulnerable relationship to convince her to jump branches. Sometimes that doesn't take much. These type are seducers and are damn good at their charm. New partners always tap their need to sharpen / perfect that charm... Also, watch for impulsive behavior. If they are satisfied with what they have and have simple things, to me that's positive and healthy. If they always have to be going on vacation, go out every single night, driving around town for some concert, comedy show, movie premiere, etc. ....be wary.

To avoid types like these in the future.... spot the red flags early... before you're invested emotionally and physically -- and run as fast as you can. Some can smash and dash or pump and dump with experienced game. For the most part though... after the lay... self-control becomes that much harder (especially if the sex is good).

It's a tight rope to walk... but one that must be walked to navigate around them and avoid a LTR with.

I wouldn't even discern this to being a 'people pleaser', more of a normal guy who works hard, treats a woman correctly and expects the same in return, which never comes. Men, genetically are mainly programmed to work hard and with appreciation are fueled to work even harder. If no matter what we do when giving our best we are constantly **** on it kills our spirit in every way.. Just the way most men are built, except for this new pusssy generation of course.
It is not so much being a people pleaser and running around kissing our girls butt, but instead the reaction of receiving nothing in return, no cooking, cleaning, kindness, appreciation, or loyalty, helping with anything in life except taking taking taking.

 

[jimjam]

Mine too except about 6 str, under a year or around a year.

I've been studying, we attract these NPD nut jobs because we are caring and kind and they crave kindness and caring towards them without ever returning it. Personalities attract. They just take take take and most mature men work hard and care for their families and stride to be appreciated.
I like being appreciated and doing well in all aspects in life. NPDs barely ever appreciate anything and keep us striving to work harder for that kindness until we have just been beat down enough to walk away.

They are truly terrible vampires. The dumb **** they say and do is ridiculous. I asked mine once if she ever pays attention to the dumb ridiculous things she says and if she is just truly lacking all shame and self respect. No answer.

HaHaHa. Too much, man.

That"s exactly what mine did. Every time I called her out on her itrational and inexplicable behavior, she'd just stare at me with this confused expression. Dumbfounded.

Worst of it is she has everyone close to me convincef she csn do no wrong. Convinced! I can't get anyone to listen.

Well, fvck them too

 

[exhausted]

HaHaHa. Too much, man.

That"s exactly what mine did. Every time I called her out on her itrational and inexplicable behavior, she'd just stare at me with this confused expression. Dumbfounded.

Worst of it is she has everyone close to me convincef she csn do no wrong. Convinced! I can't get anyone to listen.

Well, fvck them too

Or the response will be a question. Never an ability to answer a question. I would love to see these women put on the stand and questioned in a court of law it would be hysterical to watch them try to squirm.

No worries, they will wise up to her fake ways it will all come out eventually.