"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

People who insist specific interests are a must have?

ThisNThat

Banned
Joined
Feb 13, 2017
Messages
632
Reaction score
167
Age
54
Considering the title...I've noticed that some women or people in general say that you MUST be into a certain hobby in order to date them.

But it's mostly certain TYPES of interests.

Motorcycle riding is one of the biggies in my area....I'd see headlines that say, "Motorcycle momma seeks...blah blah blah.." Granted, some are lookers...esp. in chaps and tight jeans...but not my thing.

So it sounds like if you don't have a 2-wheeled vehicle...then it's a deal breaker for them. Of course, I'd see some women state IN their profile that they are NOT motorcycle riders, so they won't be riding on the back of anyone's bike.

This also goes for avid boaters or just overall water sports enthusiasts. Saw one woman expressed she's addicted to water activities. Now, I'm not really aversed to that, but..I'm not a boat owner nor prefer to own a boat. I usually go out on a friends' boat doing stuff, but that's about it. But...it's not an every weekend kind of thing with me

Then, also where I live, there are a lot of horse riders. Occasionally I'd see a pretty country gal post that she owns, breeds, and raises horses and wants a b/f that can get up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday morning to help her with the stables...and a guy would have to be also a horse enthusiast in order to be on the same page.

It seems that certain hobbies are more "lifestyles" instead though. Of course, I like board games, but who doesn't right? I'm a bit more diverse with no real focus on a hardcore thing.

I'm usually changing things up every weekend, so I don't have many specifics.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

AlexKaiser

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2017
Messages
193
Reaction score
102
Age
35
My area is filled with hikers and outdoorsy girls. Then again, living close to Glacier National Park, I'd expect it. Who comes to this side of Montana just to play video games and watch movies?
 

sazc

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 23, 2016
Messages
4,468
Reaction score
3,402
Lately I have realized that it really helps to have shared interests in common. It's going to be something you can both enjoy together and something you can talk about, something you can bond over.

If he's an avid fisherman, that's not something I am into. This translates into apart time - which isn't a bad thing, but too much apart time makes you wonder why you are a couple.
 

Roober

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2016
Messages
2,372
Reaction score
2,120
For LTRs and arguably even long term plates (3-6 months), you should share common interests to keep things fun.

Does this mean specficis? I like motorcycles, she must as well.... NO!

It means your lifestyles should match up... For example, both being into eating healthy or exercising. Or Both loving to sit and home and watch TV (snore.....). Or both loving to be outdoors, go hiking, etc. I like to travel frequently, like monthly, so I need to be with someone that can just pack up their $hit and go anywhere at any time...

And it is healthy to have a couple independent hobbies. I like playing golf and don't expect my woman to join me. It's more guy time ofr me
 

Wilko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2010
Messages
594
Reaction score
134
I have a disclaimer I throw in my profile when I'm feeling particularly cvnty: "You're one of the three remaining women on Earth that aren't into yoga."

Guess who ends up contacting me to tell me that they're really not that big into yoga. Yup, the same girls throwing a warrior pose on the beach in their profile photos.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

ThisNThat

Banned
Joined
Feb 13, 2017
Messages
632
Reaction score
167
Age
54
I have a disclaimer I throw in my profile when I'm feeling particularly cvnty: "You're one of the three remaining women on Earth that aren't into yoga."

Guess who ends up contacting me to tell me that they're really not that big into yoga. Yup, the same girls throwing a warrior pose on the beach in their profile photos.
I dated a woman who was into acro-yoga. The kind of Yoga, where you hold each other up in the air...and try to maintain that position. She said she thought it wtas kind of cool for at least trying it out, even though I wasn't into it.

Thing is...I'd always get aroused as we were always making physical contact, and she had a nice bubble booty in those yoga pants. lol We'd eventually wind up making out, because it's kind of intimate in a sense and can't help but not get aroused when doing Yoga that requires physical touch.
 
Top