Most DJ advice is for dating out of your league

[Urbanyst]

I had epiphany today after doing a number close on this 8.5 at a networking event today. You only need game, DJ tips and PUA stuff when you are trying to punch above your weight.

Hot women respond to hot guys. Women gravitate to men who are on their level or higher.

Excuse the bragging. This is just to make a point, not to be a d*ck. Right now I'm in the best shape of my life and doing well in my career finally. Power suit, power tie, my own apartment in the city and all that jazz. So now I'm finally on the same level as your typical hot girl.

When I did that number close today, the girl's hands were shaking when she confirmed my text because she was so nervous. Nervous like an AFC.

Hot girls are not something new to me. But the fact that I made this hot girl so nervous made me realize I might actually be out of her league. Imagine that.

My personality hasn't changed much over the last decade. I literally just became successful a year ago. Before that I was living with roommates and making ok money. I was always in shape though, so I still attracted a lot of hot girls. Could never make LTR's work, which is why I started reading this forum.

But I'm at a much better place now. That number close today set off a light bulb. Game is really for guys trying to date out of their league.

You don't need DJ advice to date fat chicks, so why for anyone else? Because you are trying to punch above your weight. You don't need DJ advice if hot women think you're attractive already.

Don't get me wrong. The inner game stuff is very important. But when it comes to pick-ups and cold approaches, it seems like its more about your position than your game.

Am I on to something? I know this is just one random girl, but it got me thinking.

 

[BeExcellent]

As a chick I have to agree with you. Men I run into who are at or above my level are never nervous, never AFC, never supplicating. It's very attractive NOT to have someone humping your leg as a hot woman.

My last two dates were with multimillionaires in SoCal. A successful attorney & an entertainment executive. Although I chose not to see either one again (one was too sexually aggressive, which I find to be unattractive early on, the other I really enjoy his company but I'm not sexually attracted), both were effortless in approaching, engaging in conversation & clear in their intention. Success teaches this kind of clarity of purpose.

It silently communicates that you are accustomed to hot women and it is reassuring and relaxing while at the same time motivation for the hot woman to conduct herself in a pleasant way.

It's utterly natural (strong innate inner game) for quality men after awhile. It's the entire reason the forum emphasizes self-improvement above all else.

When you mold yourself into a quality man you will attract better & better women with less & less (and eventually no) effort. Men just have to keep moving in the right direction & the results over time will create a (+) feedback loop giving you better & better results.

 

[resilient]

Good job, Urbanyst. It sounds like the success you've been having the last year has given you the extra gusto to go for the 8.5. The fact that she was shaking her hands with the phone must have been a surprise to see. Agree with BeExcellent too that it helps to not be as nervous (conveying a calm interest) and just chill in the approach. Conveying that inner confidence you've built upon time and effort does pay off in many fields besides dating.

That inspires me to go out of my league next time I'm out and someone catches my eye. Rejection be damned, just have to meet eye gaze, a quick smile of acknowledgement, make the approach smooth with a casual observation and go from there.

Cheers.

 

[devilkingx2]

DJ advice has always been for getting the most desirable girls (not personality wise), it's not that hard to get a girl who's chubby, or a 6/10 or insecure (so long as you don't go into it with the wrong mindset), but that's not what anyone wants when they come here, we're all here to smash kate upton not the local soccer moms

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

You only need game, DJ tips and PUA stuff when you are trying to punch above your weight.

It's true.

Men are as bad as women in that sense, especially herein. If a man is complainign about not getting enough attention from women or being flaked on, or 'all women are like that' it's because he's not being honest about his own SMV in the first place.

A 7/10 neck-bearded, dad-bod who spends morning noon and night in front of a computer screen, living off of pretzels and energy drink is not going to be pulling the super model 9/10 he masturbates frantically over every night. At best, he'll pull a dumpy 5/10 moustachio'd bird who serves him his McDonalds drive-thru at 4am, after a hard night of CoD action.

He could easily adjust his lifestyle and become and 8 or even a 9/10 himself and not only be happier and healthier, but he would also begin to attract the women he desires; instead, he comes to sosuave and complains about how looks/race/age/money matter and how all women are hypergamic bytches.

Long story short, if you want a loyal woman, be honest about your own value. If you want a loyal woman of higher value, increase your own value and broaden your own market.

 

[bigneil]

Yes, when you get it right, you'll always have women who are almost hot enough for you to date who will be swooning, and you literally don't ever say a word to them to get them to swoon. So that part is obviously not pick up strategy but simply having an aura and a look. This is the level where men can observe what women always knew: once people make themselves available so easily their value goes down.

Men will never have a hot girl in a vacuum. You'll have a pyramid of women, with the hottest at the top (usually pushing you back down a level), and tons of lesser women beneath her available also.

However, many men here imagine that with the right pickup line (and without new shoes or even enough to afford dinner in their wallet) they'll go from having no women ever to that one hottest girl at the top of the pyramid - and she'll be more faithful to him (and sooner) than she is to the guy who has the whole mountain of women. In reality, with work and women, we tend to make small incremental improvements versus instant riches.

 

[ThisNThat]

Lmk in a year whether her hands are still shaking lol

I am trying to figure how how the woman's shaking hands had anything to do with him?

 

[guru1000]

Yes:

Your physique does matter;
Your muscle proportion and symmetry do matter;
Your body fat levels do matter;
Your diet (and thus leanness) does matter;
Your dryness (water retention) does matter;
Your skin firmness, elasticity, and clarity do matter;
Your facial aesthetics and symmetry do matter;
Your grooming does matter;
Your style does matter;
Your frame (the value from which you are operating) does matter.

You want a 9? Then be a 9 yourself (overall); else your success will be non-existent or temporal.

 

[Roober]

Agreed with OP! I feel like I can pull HB6 and HB7 no problem at all. Need to elevate myself to get those 8's and 9's...

 

[Milano]

Nice, soon her hand will be shaking on your d1ck

 

[Urbanyst]

Lmk in a year whether her hands are still shaking lol

Hah.. my relationships don't last for sh*t so it will probably be over by then.

Never had a LTR go longer than a year. Also, starting to lose interest in LTR all together. Might just sleep with this girl and not worry too much about what happens.

 

[C00lAF]

I am trying to figure how how the woman's shaking hands had anything to do with him?

She was nervous man...

 

[AlphaNate]

I think I understand where you're coming from, but I don't agree with how this is worded. No girl is "out of my league."

Better yourself as a man and you'll attract better quality women. Don't over-complicate it.

 

[fastlife]

Just because you're not doing it consciously doesn't mean you're not running game

Game is really just how you feel about yourself and how that feeling carries over into your subcommunications (inner game); or vice-versa--how you're subcommunications make you feel about yourself (outer game).

There's nothing wrong with actually becoming the man you want to become. But it took you 10 years (and a lot of hard, not necessarily efficient, work) to get to this point. Give a man some structure, a little material, some mindsets to work from, and 3 months of hitting the field a 10 or so hours a week and he could effect the same feelings in the same caliber of girl in a wifebeater and some knocked up tennis shoes.

If...

• Losing your job
• Losing your hair
• Losing your house
• Feeling depressed
• Losing your social status

If any of those things would limit your future options with women, you need game.

 

[El Payaso]

Right now I'm in the best shape of my life and doing well in my career finally. Power suit, power tie, my own apartment in the city and all that jazz. So now I'm finally on the same level as your typical hot girl.

Just to clarify, do you mean the hot girl who works at Starbucks earning a little over minimum wage or a hot girl with an actual career earning big bucks?

 

[Urbanyst]

[Just to clarify, do you mean the hot girl who works at Starbucks earning a little over minimum wage or a hot girl with an actual career earning big bucks?

Both.

Didn't think a woman's value went up based on her career. Do you?

 

[El Payaso]

Both.

Didn't think a woman's value went up based on her career. Do you?

Yes.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Yes.

I also say yes. If she has $$$ she can actually do something for me.

 

[Urbanyst]

Yes.

So you would rather date Oprah or Rosie O'Donnell than a really hot woman working at Starbucks?

That's interesting.

 

[Pandora]

Congrats on going up a level in your SMV and game. I would slightly disagree tho. The issue is that a female 7 is not going to be stay with a male 7. Many females dont want to date on their level. Another issue is that many girls dont even value interesting hobbies or self improvement. The only self improvement they value is the physical self improvement. Many times being a well rounded guy actually hurts you. Fee free to disagree tho. This is just my observations.