"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Take salsa classes

TheGambino

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 25, 2013
Messages
2,751
Reaction score
970
Location
Somewhere
I'm a dancer.

I went to salsa classes for the first time ever.

A lot of different girls are there. Everyone is pretty much the same and you can dance with any girl. It's a unwritten rule (for inexperienced guys) that girls don't reject men that aproach a girl for a dance at salsa classes. You can easily build a sexual tension with a lady at the classes and build rapport and comfort which could lead to a date afterwards.

Also I think girls that like salsa are more sexual then other girls. I would recommend it for anyone who wants to find a spot where you can easily hit on the ladies and the inexperienced guys who want to get more comfort around the girls.

In my city there are several salsa nights next to the classes at saturday where it's a open party for anyone who wants to come and dance. And the same thing goes on, everyone dances with different partners and it's all good.

I had a great night and got about 5 phone numbers. Im going to make a hobby out of it and go every week so I could rock the dancefloor at the big salsa events this summer !!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
5,416
Reaction score
7,942
Age
57
Women LOVE a man who can move; a man who can lead; a man who can dance. Its just plain sexy. It gives a man great confidence and teaches him how to lead an interaction through dance, and this is a great thing.

You can also learn which women know how to follow, which can translate off the dance floor and into life.
 

Von

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 23, 2016
Messages
2,189
Reaction score
1,221
Age
37
Dancing lessons and dance night is the only spot I meet girls in my scarcity life.

Dancing will give you great insight on the personality of your partners. Good way to early screen
 

AlphaNate

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 23, 2012
Messages
756
Reaction score
569
Location
USA
I've been interested in pursuing this. Does it matter if I have no experience dancing?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
8,404
Reaction score
5,164
Location
Eastern Time Zone where it's always really late
Dancing is totally learnable. Some people pick it up faster than others, but pretty much anybody can learn it.

If you see some students in a beginner class that seem a little TOO good (or picking it up unusually fast), don't worry. Experienced dancers repeat classes a lot for practice, so they might not actually be beginners. But you will have some real beginners in the same boat as you in your class. Have fun and keep practicing.
 
Last edited:

Konada

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2011
Messages
1,229
Reaction score
649
Women LOVE a man who can move; a man who can lead; a man who can dance. Its just plain sexy. It gives a man great confidence and teaches him how to lead an interaction through dance, and this is a great thing.

You can also learn which women know how to follow, which can translate off the dance floor and into life.
Better yet. I get to put women in their place when they don't follow and there's no social repurcussions!
 

Herb

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 9, 2016
Messages
76
Reaction score
17
Age
36
It is a really useful skill to learn how to do this. I found tango a little easier for me since it's somewhat more structured but I am currently taking salsa lessons.

I go to a place that does lessons every Thursday, followed by some time to just freely dance, with only a 5 dollar cover fee to get in. It starts off with the beginner classes, followed by the intermediate (the advanced ones need to be booked). You just show up and the gay instructor guy shows the group some basic moves, and eventually you start trying them with a lady, and rotate partners every two minutes or so. It's really fast-paced, though, with some of the 'spinning' moves not really well explained, and clearly the instructor doesn't really care much about each person getting something out of it or really learning (which makes sense as they're not individual lessons).

Anyway, I've learned that most of the people there are already intermediate or higher level, but for some reason still do the beginner classes. But a lot of the women, instead of being friendly, welcoming, understanding, and helpful to total beginners, instead get kind of impatient if you can't keep up with them or just mess up a lot. Lot of Latina women. Maybe they see a guy without dance skills as just beta and unattractive. Until I'm actually paired with them there's lots of IOI's and looks from across the room, but while we're paired up for the actual dance, they start getting sorta uncomfortable, probably because I'm either somewhat clunky and uncoordinated with my moves or, realizing this, display a lack of confidence and certitude, though I sometimes self-deprecatingly joke about it. A few of them gave me some useful pointers but many of them just kind of awkwardly say well nice meeting you and move on, and look like they're having more fun with the next guy who knows what they're doing (even if that guy is only 5'5" or 60 years old).

I have gotten better over a month, but I could've used a place that's more welcoming for true beginners in this style of dance. Or do it with people that I already know. Definitely sticking with it though; it'll pay off in due time.
 

EmotionalGeek

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2016
Messages
218
Reaction score
51
Age
43
Location
Poland
A few of them gave me some useful pointers but many of them just kind of awkwardly say well nice meeting you and move on, and look like they're having more fun with the next guy who knows what they're doing (even if that guy is only 5'5" or 60 years old).
This is typical when someone is treating classes as sport. They goal is to get better, not to find partner, so they prefer better dancers over better boyfriends.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,586
Reaction score
11,948
Location
DFW, TX
It is a really useful skill to learn how to do this. I found tango a little easier for me since it's somewhat more structured but I am currently taking salsa lessons.

I go to a place that does lessons every Thursday, followed by some time to just freely dance, with only a 5 dollar cover fee to get in. It starts off with the beginner classes, followed by the intermediate (the advanced ones need to be booked). You just show up and the gay instructor guy shows the group some basic moves, and eventually you start trying them with a lady, and rotate partners every two minutes or so. It's really fast-paced, though, with some of the 'spinning' moves not really well explained, and clearly the instructor doesn't really care much about each person getting something out of it or really learning (which makes sense as they're not individual lessons).

Anyway, I've learned that most of the people there are already intermediate or higher level, but for some reason still do the beginner classes. But a lot of the women, instead of being friendly, welcoming, understanding, and helpful to total beginners, instead get kind of impatient if you can't keep up with them or just mess up a lot. Lot of Latina women. Maybe they see a guy without dance skills as just beta and unattractive. Until I'm actually paired with them there's lots of IOI's and looks from across the room, but while we're paired up for the actual dance, they start getting sorta uncomfortable, probably because I'm either somewhat clunky and uncoordinated with my moves or, realizing this, display a lack of confidence and certitude, though I sometimes self-deprecatingly joke about it. A few of them gave me some useful pointers but many of them just kind of awkwardly say well nice meeting you and move on, and look like they're having more fun with the next guy who knows what they're doing (even if that guy is only 5'5" or 60 years old).

I have gotten better over a month, but I could've used a place that's more welcoming for true beginners in this style of dance. Or do it with people that I already know. Definitely sticking with it though; it'll pay off in due time.
Give it six months. Spend 3-5 hrs a week in classes. Use multiple instructors classes if you have to. Your skill will raise.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

wifehunter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2015
Messages
5,145
Reaction score
3,302
Age
52
Location
Hoe County, California
It's also great with corn chips!
 
Top