Someone help me make sense of her behavior

[icantgetlaid]

So i hit it off with this girl i met online. We were having sex shortly after the first date. This girl is really great in a lot of ways .. in almost every way actually.

She's beautiful .. nice body .. successful .. good behavior .. seems super loyal ... has me convinced she doesn't have a long history as a slut .. etc.. etc. etc. I've never met a girl who shows so many signs of really high interest, invests so heavily into the relationship (constantly bringing over food she made, cooking at my house, being submissive, offering to pay for everything, bringing me drinks, and just countless other selfless behavior, etc.) texting me often .. initiating dates .. coming over for awesome sex marathons (she lives 30+ mins away).. etc. etc. like i have no complaints whatsoever.

The thing is, that i like her, and it puzzles the crap out of me that she would show so many signs of high interest but she only wants FWB situation. She knows that i see several other girls regularly, and she's cool with it/encourages it. She keeps an online dating profile and checks it daily ... and she insists she's looking for a man to marry, and when she finds him she will stop having sex with me.

Anybody been in a situation like this before ? is she sh1t testing me ... playing mind games ... etc. ? don't most girls want commitment/one partner/? like something isn't adding up here...

 

[Red Legg]

Not hard to explain really.This woman is keeping her options open,you are just one of MANY.

 

[icantgetlaid]

Not hard to explain really.This woman is keeping her options open,you are just one of MANY.

She swears I'm the only guy she's fvcking .. and normally i would just roll my eyes and not believe it .. but at the moment i have no reason to believe otherwise.

 

[Red Legg]

"She keeps an online dating profile and checks it daily"

 

[Billtx49]

She is currently an active shopper and thinks she may be able to do better.
Don't invest in her unless her attitude changes.

 

[icantgetlaid]

She is currently an active shopper and thinks she may be able to do better.
Don't invest in her unless her attitude changes.

what do you mean by don't invest in her? should i keep banging her / letting her do stuff for me .. ?

 

[Billtx49]

what do you mean by don't invest in her? should i keep banging her / letting her do stuff for me .. ?

Enjoy the ride for as long as it lasts. Do not catch feelings unless she brings up being exclusive with you and wants a commitment for it from you.

 

[El Payaso]

What is hard to figure out?

You're a pump and dump for her as soon as she finds her daddy Warbucks to marry.

Which means don't invest any emotions or feelings in her.

 

[dude99]

She swears I'm the only guy she's fvcking .. and normally i would just roll my eyes and not believe it .. but at the moment i have no reason to believe otherwise.

You are the only guy she is F_cking......for now.

 

[Billtx49]

She swears I'm the only guy she's fvcking .. and normally i would just roll my eyes and not believe it .. but at the moment i have no reason to believe otherwise.

She's obviously a very giving person, but don't confuse that with her having an emotional investment in you yet.
Free food and drinks are great, but it is not love until she feels it.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

what do you mean by don't invest in her? should i keep banging her / letting her do stuff for me .. ?

Yes. If you want her to chase harder get busier with other women and things. Put attention on other things. Keep hitting it and letting her help. Also be about 60-70% reliable. Never 100%.

 

[El Payaso]

I wouldn't turn down all her food and help. It's her way to get you hooked and attached. Like a drug. You'll get a withdrawal when she pulls them away. Unless you have good mental fortitude.

 

[bigneil]

How does OP derive "seems super loyal" from this? And why is he angling toward loyalty after one date? That's what she should be bringing up after about 10 dates and 60-90 days.

 

[icantgetlaid]

i've known her for about a month now .. and we've been seeing each other about 2-3 times a week .. so there's definitely some rapport built here. i mentioned her being seemingly "super loyal" based on conversations we've had/her offering constant assistance .. i guess it's more of an intuitive guess than anything else.

 

[bigneil]

i've known her for about a month now .. and we've been seeing each other about 2-3 times a week .. so there's definitely some rapport built here. i mentioned her being seemingly "super loyal" based on conversations we've had/her offering constant assistance .. i guess it's more of an intuitive guess than anything else.

No girl should ever seem "super loyal" after a month of knowing her. There is no way you know her that well. Number of times together is good, but elapsed time is also a big factor.

 

[Billtx49]

Seeing her 2-3 times per week is too often at this stage. Keep her hungry for your attention.

 

[icantgetlaid]

Seeing her 2-3 times per week is too often at this stage.

We both had time off during the holidays and were getting together every other night during the whole christmas/new year time period. Before and since then .. it's more once or twice a week.

 

[Billtx49]

We both had time off during the holidays and were getting together every other night during the whole christmas/new year time period. Before and since then .. it's more once or twice a week.

Keep it at once a week for a few months. Scarcity builds value in you, her, and time together.

 

[icantgetlaid]

The more i think about this the more it makes sense. I'm happy i posted this here.

There are several girls that i fvck that i have little interest in other than sex when i have little else going on .. out of boredom .. etc. I just noticed after reading responses here and reflecting on my relationship with this girl that im probably the guy she's fvcking out of boredom/when she has nothing better going on/etc. What other reason would she constantly be encouraging me to be with other girls, still checking her online dating profile everyday, and reminding me that she's looking for a husband, etc. ?

It's a tough pill to swallow .. but it's apart of the game. Time to stop pedestalizing her. Thanks for the the excellent feedback/providing clarity on the situation.

 

[sazc]

Take what you want, dont catch feelings. Use her to satisfy your needs while you look for other women.