"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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I got hit by a car today

f(x)

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 28, 2015
Messages
274
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234
As I was crossing the street, a car at a stop sign didn't see me and knocked me over the hood and to the ground into oncoming traffic. I'm fine, but the fact that life can be taken in an instant was realized today. My almost maniacal confidence now knows no bounds. I am living each day as if it were my last, from here to eternity. I'm not going to post again 'til I nail a bubble butt blonde. Peace, friends.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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spiegel549

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2012
Messages
435
Reaction score
55
Location
Los Angeles
As I was crossing the street, a car at a stop sign didn't see me and knocked me over the hood and to the ground into oncoming traffic. I'm fine, but the fact that life can be taken in an instant was realized today. My almost maniacal confidence now knows no bounds. I am living each day as if it were my last, from here to eternity. I'm not going to post again 'til I nail a bubble butt blonde. Peace, friends.
This is 2016. I hope you got a picture of the license plate, driver, and there drivers license. Most importantly today or tomorrow go see your doctor because your neck, back, knees, arms are KILLING YOU...you are in pain and mentally that accident is effecting your day to day activity. CASH IN BABY!!!!! $$$$
 
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