"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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WTF, She Messaged Me Early In The Morning To Say?

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That she (a co-worker I have only known for a few months and thought I was getting along well with) was going to remove me off Facebook because I message her too much and it makes her slightly uncomfortable?

Here's the thing, she sent me a married man the message at 2:34 in the morning!, the messages I sent were jokes and funny gifs and she would always send some back, the messages were sent maybe once or twice a week, she would often refer to me as babe or hon.

I've blocked her on Facebook and I'll keep it professional at work with her but I should add that she has touched me (on the shoulder mainly) on numerous occasions and was often around my desk and sending me emails at work, she invited me to her Birthday drinks last week but I couldn't go due to illness and now I get this garbage?

On the night of her Birthday drinks she accidentally sent me an audio recording and I replied back all good I thought you were showing me what I was missing out on so she sent a photo with her and a Guy and a Girl I hate as I had a massive fallout with her due to her being a major drama/gossip Queen/*****, I think someone has been talking **** about me to be honest.

Thoughts please...
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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This was the message

Hey I hope you are well. Just wanted to message to say that I'm going to delete you off Facebook. I'm messaging so that I have been honest and not been sneaky about anything. You have been friendly to me and have been at work, but you message me too much. I guess you are just being friendly, but I get messages off you more than my family at home and it makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. I know you may be annoyed with this message, but I'm just trying to be upfront and honest. And to speak to you in person rather than go elsewhere.
Thanks

Messaging someone on FB is not speaking in person though is it?
 

HoneyHitter

Senior Don Juan
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Excellent trolling skills.

If someone sending her two messages a week drains her more than her family, her family is what she really needs to be concerned about.
 

LiveFreeX

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Be careful, women aren't your friend... your marriage could be on the line next. She was hitting on you, you rejected her and now the hurt is coming. This gentlemen is why there is no such thing as a 'female friend'. I've had a couple of these happen where women actively tried to fvck up my marriage and get my wife to leave me. When the advances aren't reciprocated, she needs to save face and she will do it by making you look like a creepy fvck. Make sure you show your wife ALL the messages she has been sending you, that is if you are completely innocent.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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parkthebus

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I agree that she was interested in you and has now lost attraction because you didn't make a move and have made her feel unattractive and also because she thought you were playing the game but didn't know how to score. So by saying you're messaging her too much, she:

A - removes what she considers to be an unwanted orbiter.

B - protects her ego by believing its her rejecting you rather than you rejecting her.
 
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Thanks for all of the replies, I'm not into her, I'm married with a child on the way and she knows this so this doesn't make any damn sense , I was just trying to get to know a new colleague that I thought I was getting on with, so how do I act around her now?

We work in the same team and she is one desk down from me, it's pretty awkward, should I only ever speak to her about work things?

I'm very positive that a Girl I rejected last year (who put my job on the line so I just act like she doesn't exist and don't even make eye contact with) who has been on a long crusade to get people offside with me has been talking **** about me, that crosses boundaries for me but I don't really have proof.
 
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Just ignore her. She is no longer worth your attention.
I am, I just give a good morning and that's it, I heard some things about what happened on Friday night, the selfie (***** that I can't stand was in it) that was taken was taken by her was sent by her after she screamed at a Friend of mine to not take another photo and to not send it to me (he got annoyed about it too) after she sent it she accused him of sending it.

This Girl is 31 and clearly a BPD victim.
 

MOTU

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This is why I don't have any co-workers on my fb and my privacy is set to max. I get requests all the time and I politely reply that fb is for family, but I would be happy to connect on linked in.

Also, this is why most here say "don't sh!t where you eat". Don't mix your social life and your work life. I am not saying you can't have friends at work, but you have to be super careful. Work is for advancing your career not making drinking buddies. I have seen too many folks develop outside relationships with Co workers, then get promoted over said "friends" and then have a hard time managing them because they know where all the bodies are buried.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Die Hard

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A girl acts like an idiot... So what else is new?

Don't take it as a sign that you did something wrong, take it as a sign that she's just another idiot displaying moronic behaviour like only women can! Thinking about why she does this etc. is a waste of your time. It's just a simple fact: girl acts like idiot.

The appropriate response to this fact is displayed by the bald guy at 00.57

Just shrug it off. The world is full of foolish women who are not worth your time, your attention, not even your THOUGHTS, and certainly not starting a thread over!

Focus on women who act normal and give you positive feelings, just disregard the rest like you disregard a piece of sh!t you flush through the toilet....
 
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Yewki

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Hey I hope you are well. Just wanted to message to say that I'm going to delete you off Facebook. I'm messaging so that I have been honest and not been sneaky about anything. You have been friendly to me and have been at work, but you message me too much. I guess you are just being friendly, but I get messages off you more than my family at home and it makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. I know you may be annoyed with this message, but I'm just trying to be upfront and honest. And to speak to you in person rather than go elsewhere.
Thanks
Someone doesn't take rejection well
 

Yewki

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Haha but how did I reject her?
She prob had a thing for you and secretly hoped you'd cheat on your wife with her. You flaking on her birthday and then the crazy BDP girl talking sh*t about you ruined her fantasy. Now her ego is bruised and she wants to get closure as the one who "ended it."
 
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She prob had a thing for you and secretly hoped you'd cheat on your wife with her. You flaking on her birthday and then the crazy BDP girl talking sh*t about you ruined her fantasy. Now her ego is bruised and she wants to get closure as the one who "ended it."
Something set her off, she talked to a Friend about me and said that she was going to management about me, she only went to my supervisor who just said keep your distance and don't email or message her again.

I didn't flake on her I was genuinely sick and that other BPD ***** is always pissed off with me, it's hilarious.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

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What happened first, you missed her bday party or her going to your supervisor?
Missing her Birthday drinks...is it possible what set her off is that I told her that it would be very awkward if another Girl was there because we don't get on at all? I just saw her before actually and she can't even look me in the eye, every time I see her she looks really pissed off.

I ignore her and have done so for months, I gave nothing to say to her and she chose to talk **** about me to other co-workers and get a Friend to tell me that she didn't want to be "Friends" anymore...lol how weak is that? Do you own dirty work you childish can't.
 
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Can you dudes explain to me why since this drama happened that the other co-worker (who I have ignored for months and don't want anything to do with) has always been in my path lately, is it just coincidence that this happens?

Is she trying to get my attention?

I'm just curious really because it would not make any God Damn sense if she was jealous as she cut off our "Friendship" and blocked me on Facebook and Instagram.
 
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You work with some ****ed up women mate
Sad but very true...first co-worker just looks at me and is often going to the bathroom with her Friend.

Second one, I don't really know it's almost like she is "marking her territory" though and I've noticed that since last Friday night that those two don't talk or even acknowledge each other, I'm possibly wrong but I think that she invited her to the birthday drinks to check out her "competition" and that is why she didn't want the photo sent to me and screamed at my Friend about it.

I just need some answers so I can keep things civil at work, theses bitches are not worth my time but I have to work with them.
 

BeTheChange

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You're a p*ssy mate. Man up, get on with work and ignore her. Christ. It's not that difficult.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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