What do you say when people ask why you're single?

[Greasy Pig]

As I've aged and maintained my bachelor status, I've found more and more people (especially women I've been gaming lately) asking why I'm single.

The other more concerning question many of them seem to ask is: "Are you gay?"

I have a great job, I'm looking as fit as ever and in the past four months, I've worked really hard on honing my game and it's working. In the past two months I've banged four different chicks and got two more phone numbers I'm working on.

But the other night, this potential plate and I were texting and she wrote back at one stage: "God, you are so funny. How the hell have you not been married? You're not gay or something are you?"
I wrote back: "If there were no women left on Earth - and there were no goats - I would die heroically searching for a planet that had women on it."

How do you other brothers answer questions about why you're single or if you're gay? Should you just laugh it off? Answer it truthfully (obviously not disclosing everything)?

I really just want to tell people that I enjoy fvcking lots of different women and have no desire to be tied down to just one vagyna. But what's the best way to answer?

I can only see it getting worse as people perceive you as having high value yet no long-term relationship.

 

[betheman]

I think your response was pretty good, however you dont have to answer to anyone, its one thing for a potential lay asking it/testing you, you would expect that, what I wouldnt do is indicate to them Im never going to get married (I really dont believe I ever will again or want to) you will blow a lot of women off if you do this, they secretly harbour, some not so secretly, the desire to be married.
when she asks this she is looking for clues as to how to bag you or is there a problem (i.e. he doesnt ever want to get married). the standard is of course; "Ive never met 'the one', came close a couple of times but we have to keep trying eh?" type of BS

 

[samspade]

You can inject truth but use humor to deflect the question as well.

"It's hard to find a good woman who'll marry an ex-con."

"I'm gay for women and fine clothes."

"Who said I haven't been married? I have a wife in Tahiti; she just turned 17."

Keep it short and sweet. (The last one is a little wordy but fine.)

Heartiste once advised saying that you were engaged once, to a French girl, but you broke it off. I'm not sure I could ever pull off that ruse, but I admit it would probably get the hamster spinning.

Any time you can deflect with humor + DHV, do it. You keep things mysterious, keep the subject light, and keep her wondering.

 

[DMSR76]

My standard response to the 'why aren't you married' question is: "Because I never asked."

 

[SecondHalf]

Your answer was good.
I can just play the divorce card. Every woman understands.

Even if I had to make it up, I'd use it.
There is a stigma attached to people that have never been married, it will eventually work against you.

SH

 

[Jonnybangbang]

Havent you heard? Single is the new married...

 

[Nutz]

"Haven't found the right girl" so some iteration thereof does the trick.

 

[Shockwavedave]

It's hard to stick with one girl when you're a 00 agent

 

[st_99]

idk

 

[FairShake]

If you're 35 or older and have never been married A LOT of women out there are going to think something's wrong with you.

I'm sure there isn't anything wrong with you, but a lot of guys who ARE over 35 and not married are only not married because they are gay, alcoholic losers, or awkward psychos. If you are doing well with a woman, vibing and entertaining, she will assume you aren't awkward. If you look good she will assume not an alcoholic. But good-looking AND charming AND over 35 and not married. Gay.

It's just how it is. You have to show her you aren't.

 

[st_99]

If you're 35 or older and have never been married A LOT of women out there are going to think something's wrong with you.

I'm sure there isn't anything wrong with you, but a lot of guys who ARE over 35 and not married are only not married because they are gay, alcoholic losers, or awkward psychos. If you are doing well with a woman, vibing and entertaining, she will assume you aren't awkward. If you look good she will assume not an alcoholic. But good-looking AND charming AND over 35 and not married. Gay.

It's just how it is. You have to show her you aren't.

lol, this aint 1950 bro.

 

[FairShake]

lol, this aint 1950 bro.

I'm just telling you how women think. And what they say.

If you haven't been married at 40 it's a red flag to them.

As for what I've seen, a high percentage of guys I've known who weren't married by 40 had one or more of those characteristics too. Not all, but many.

Edit: Let me make clear I'm talking about Middle class women and those that are White and Asian. Marriage is still high among those groups with an ever lowering divorce rate. Poorer women and Black and Hispanic not so much.

 

[st_99]

the stats don't really confirm your assumption. im not sure if you're talking about small town america or maybe the bible belt or whatever but in every big city i've been to its actually the norm to be in your 30's and not married. and i'm talking about educated, good job, social life, yada yada

 

[FairShake]

I'm talking about middle-class White and Asian Americans urban and suburban.

35 might be a bit young. But 40 is pushing it.

 

[Jitterbug]

If it's a potential girl:

"Why are you single?"

"Haven't yet found someone woman enough for me"

Thrown down the challenge, my friends.

 

[st_99]

I'm talking about middle-class White and Asian Americans urban and suburban.

35 might be a bit young. But 40 is pushing it.

well, whatever the case may be usually it goes something like this, if you think its weird, then they think its weird, if you embrace and love it they think its cool. girls more or less copy whatever you do and think, if you're doing right..

 

[corrector]

well, whatever the case may be usually it goes something like this, if you think its weird, then they think its weird, if you embrace and love it they think its cool. girls more or less copy whatever you do and think, if you're doing right..

Yeah, it's also AFC to live your life based on "peer-pressure". Who cares what other people are doing by what age.

Are you going to brag you got married, and she divorced you, took half-your assets, took your children, made false charges of domestic abuse so you had to go to jail and get ass-raped by another inmate vs not being married at all in the first place? Sometimes these expectations are just stupid.

 

[Nutz]

If it's a potential girl:

"Why are you single?"

"Haven't yet found someone woman enough for me"

Thrown down the challenge, my friends.

Nailed it! You're the prize, you have standards, you are the one screening them. That's how you should frame it when this question arises. Then you pressure flip and turn the question around on them:

Her: Why are you single?
Me: Haven't found the right woman/someone woman enough for me. How about you?
Her: Oh, uh, um.....

 

[Robert28]

If you're 35 or older and have never been married A LOT of women out there are going to think something's wrong with you.

I'm sure there isn't anything wrong with you, but a lot of guys who ARE over 35 and not married are only not married because they are gay, alcoholic losers, or awkward psychos. If you are doing well with a woman, vibing and entertaining, she will assume you aren't awkward. If you look good she will assume not an alcoholic. But good-looking AND charming AND over 35 and not married. Gay.

It's just how it is. You have to show her you aren't.

to be honest I don't care what they think. you know what I think of a single mom that's never been married? trash. gutter trash. I'm not talking about single moms that have been married and had kids while they were married. sure society today says that it's WONDERFUL for a woman to have kids with random guys and never be married or depend on the father to raise them. yet, that same society says a guy who's in his 30's that's never been married or been responsible enough to not father any b@$tard kids is looked down upon as "having problems".:crackup: see what kind of sense that makes? a girl is reveered of being a wh0re and anyone that shows responsibility is shunned. sorry, but as fvcked up as society is these days I don't know that I would want to be considered the "norm" in it.

 

[speed dawg]

You can inject truth but use humor to deflect the question as well.

"It's hard to find a good woman who'll marry an ex-con."

"I'm gay for women and fine clothes."

"Who said I haven't been married? I have a wife in Tahiti; she just turned 17."

Keep it short and sweet. (The last one is a little wordy but fine.)

Heartiste once advised saying that you were engaged once, to a French girl, but you broke it off. I'm not sure I could ever pull off that ruse, but I admit it would probably get the hamster spinning.

Any time you can deflect with humor + DHV, do it. You keep things mysterious, keep the subject light, and keep her wondering.

This. All these other one liners these guys are posting is pretty douchetastic.

Don't friggin' tell the girl you're in between relationships or play the divorce card. That's terrible. It's all about the humor. Don't directly answer these type questions that can lead to heavy subjects. Haven't you guys learned anything by being here???