decentguy said:
Her response within a few seconds was the following:
"it's a good thing because I too have something planned. Let's reschedule bowling for another time! Good night."
Guys, I'm really not sure how to interpret this. Is she playing games? Is she sincere? Is this all one big sh!t test?
Read your last sentence above. Now read it again. The fact is, you are bewildered. Why?
My guess is that the "cancel on her" tactic just backfired on you.
IF it had worked as you hoped, you would have received a reply from her in which she expressed disappointment or sadness that you were not available. And she would probably have enquired about ( or suggested ) another meet or given you a counter offer.
Instead, her reply to your 'cancelation' was grateful . She was pleased that you canceled . However she was polite enough to leave the door ajar a little by saying,"..reschedule bowling for another time".
Look, there is a time and context to cancel out on a woman BUT you need to understand the way to apply it.
Some of the advice that you received here was way too gung ho and hopelessly out of context with the situation.
MY guess (from the evidence before us) is that she DID have a dinner planned and she wanted to keep her agreement to attend it. Why should she flake on her girls to be with a guy after only ONE date with you.
The belief that she ' should, or would have canceled it to be with you if she is into you' is really High School egotistic stupidity.
You are in a weakened position here because you used the wrong counter tactics.
If fact the situation really did not need a tactical response at all.
You are not invested in her yet nor is she in you. She has done no wrong which needed putting right.
This what I would have done -
She says," ... maybe going to dinner with girls Monday night .."
MY reply, " Cool, enjoy yourself...I will call you later in the week."
That way you control "the energy" between you and you demonstate a kind of calm indifference..
She gets to blab with her girls on Monday night( about you) , you can explore other options if you wish inbetween times, and you also have plenty of time to plan the next move or date with her.
No sweat.