OregonDuckJuan
Don Juan
Hello Gents!
I wanted to hear some of your thoughts on indifference.
I am talking about the indifference you may, or may not, portray, say, on a first date or when first conversing with a woman.
There are several, differing schools of thought I am sure.
First there is the thought that acting indifferent keeps the women on edge. They aren't sure which way you are thinking..you haven't tipped your hand, and you aren't "all-over them" which they may get a lot. You make them earn your respect and you are laying back and feeling it out.
The pro: You are in control. You haven't yet put yourself out there and can decide how to take things.
The con: Someone want you to show you like them. Sometimes, I have heard that if a guy is indifferent the women will feel that way too. A girl may find you attractive but if you are too indifferent those feelings may disappear and your plan has backfired.
Second, there is the guy that is completely obvious about his interest in a girl. He compliments, he tries to sit close and his cards are on the table. Obviously, she knows whats up for better or worse--it may be a turn-off or it may work.
The pro to this is: She may want to feel wanted, so being open (in a non-verbal way) about how you feel (getting close, etc), makes her feel wanted and she likes that.
The con is: It can be abrupt, too much too soon, too sleazy, or just too aggressive
So, my question remains: What is the value of indifference? Is it a good thing? A bad thing? Is being 'hard to read' or 'indifferent' a good thing or a bad thing?
Just food for thought.
I wanted to hear some of your thoughts on indifference.
I am talking about the indifference you may, or may not, portray, say, on a first date or when first conversing with a woman.
There are several, differing schools of thought I am sure.
First there is the thought that acting indifferent keeps the women on edge. They aren't sure which way you are thinking..you haven't tipped your hand, and you aren't "all-over them" which they may get a lot. You make them earn your respect and you are laying back and feeling it out.
The pro: You are in control. You haven't yet put yourself out there and can decide how to take things.
The con: Someone want you to show you like them. Sometimes, I have heard that if a guy is indifferent the women will feel that way too. A girl may find you attractive but if you are too indifferent those feelings may disappear and your plan has backfired.
Second, there is the guy that is completely obvious about his interest in a girl. He compliments, he tries to sit close and his cards are on the table. Obviously, she knows whats up for better or worse--it may be a turn-off or it may work.
The pro to this is: She may want to feel wanted, so being open (in a non-verbal way) about how you feel (getting close, etc), makes her feel wanted and she likes that.
The con is: It can be abrupt, too much too soon, too sleazy, or just too aggressive
So, my question remains: What is the value of indifference? Is it a good thing? A bad thing? Is being 'hard to read' or 'indifferent' a good thing or a bad thing?
Just food for thought.