The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[starplayer]

Until the end of October AT LEAST I am going NC. In my case it is not looking at her FB, etc.

I already know I can go forever without contacting her. But I need to stop seeing photos of her out slvtting it up. It has gone on far too long and it only hurts me. It stops right now.

First challenge is actually get to october 5 days to go
Second challenge is whole of october (won't be easy)
If I make it that far, third challenge is whole of november

Christmas will be tough because I might run into her. After that I'll decide what to do but hopefully I can go NC forever. If I remember I'll post back here.

I am also taking this opportunity to go TOTAL NC on 4 other girls for as long as possible (hopefully forever). Should be easier because I don't even like them. Already almost 2 months in for them.

Let it begin.

 

[Paintballguy]

Until the end of October AT LEAST I am going NC. In my case it is not looking at her FB, etc.

I already know I can go forever without contacting her. But I need to stop seeing photos of her out slvtting it up. It has gone on far too long and it only hurts me. It stops right now.
.

Just delete her from your friends. I was doing the same with my ex. I just deleted her, so I can't see her profile now.

 

[Jinjo]

63 days no contact

and I wish I could say I'm "all better", but I'm not.

I spent over 20 years with him. We lost our virginity together as teenagers. Every memory I have includes him.

Things were getting bad, he was being cold and heartless for months. On July 26 I went to bed early, watched a bit of a movie and came downstairs for a glass of water. He wasn't in the house although the front door was deadbolted. Long story short I caught him sneaking in the back gate which he hasn't used ONCE the whole time we lived there. I confronted him and he said "I don't love you anymore. I met someone else". He then threw me out of the house after being so cold and cruel I still can't wrap my head around it. My life turned into a nightmare that night and it has been ever since. His sister told me a few weeks ago that the thing with this girl (who he works with STILL) "fizzled out" after a couple weeks after I left, even though they had been having an emotional affair for months. I still don't know if people told me that to make me a bit less hurt, or what. But I've been best friends with his sister since I was 13, and she is not a liar. She's blunt with facts, that's for sure.

Either way, it was made clear to me that he doesn't love me anymore and HAS moved on. In these 63 days I have not contacted him. and he certainly hasn't contacted me. As I said, his sister is blunt and she told me that I never even come up in conversation when they talk. How is that possible after spending our lives together? I'll never wrap my head around that.

I know NC IS the way to go, it's been preached to me since day 1. but for me personally, it makes me more deeply deeply saddened as every day passes. He hasn't even mentioned me or even attempted to send an e-mail, letalone a phone call in over 2 months. I miss him so much it's hell on earth. All I do is think about who he's with/what he's doing/and the worst part, that he doesn't love me anymore.

I wish so much this would get easier. I'm mourning a man that scraped me off his shoe like dog crap, and moved on without even blinking. My whole life, wasted.

 

[Semtex]

Broke all the rules, (begged/pleaded, cried, bargained, etc) only made her push me away. Will implement the no contact rule in an hour and a hald after getting some logistical/fiscal things in order.

Funny thing is she was always super clingy and jealous during the relationship, and she claims that her not overcoming her jealousies was the reason why she no longer wants to be with me. I called bull****, and in a fit of rage she admitted to me some old high school flame is going to be in town travelling all the way from Arizona for a wedding, and apparently remembering how 'special' he made her feel back then made it clear to her how much of a douche/jerk I am.

She's been sending me mixed messages, as in, telling me she's still in love and cant get over the physical/sexual attraction (which I believe, the one thing that aint bs) and she continued messaging and visiting me even though I sensed her distance as early as the 23rd of september.

Coincidentally, a pretty girl just left a quite flattering comment on my facebook wall. I will use this opportunity to spin plates, and get over the flunky feeling that I let 'the one' get away.

My ex is supposed to go on a paid vacation with me on the 5th, but she has been slipping details about preferring to go with the old flame to this lame cemetery wedding on the 20th, so, if she bails on the trip on the 5th, I will completely delete all her info and incidentals from my life.

Wish me luck fellas

 

[starplayer]

Well I made it to the end of October. Very pleased with that. She's still been on my mind this month but it's probably been the easiest month since it ended. I'm slowly getting it under control, but I still know I'm far from being totally over her. TOTAL NC certainly seems to help though.

But looked at her FB this morning - don't know why I did, curiosity got the better of me I guess. It's made me feel slightly bad all day after seeing her out partying. The image has been in my head all day. I seriously think half of this is about my stupid ego more than anything.

Well now to try and get through November and well into December. At the very least I want to make it 50 days (get to 22nd December). But if I can, New Years Day is my target. It really depends how the Christmas holidays go.

Still total NC on the other girls, and plan to keep that going indefinitely.

Day 1 starts again tomorrow. Hopefully this run will go as well as the last.

 

[Bratt2230]

Amazing post.

Since i am still having trouble getting over her, i guess i will start the NC challenge.

So today is Day 1.

I hope VERY MUCH, this will help me through

 

[johnca2010]

Let's make this happen. I still occasionally feel bad about things but am getting over it and getting back on track with my goals. Met up with a hot girl yesterday and had some fun but was still constantly thinking about the ex gf.

 

[Bratt2230]

Day 1 ..

I constantly want to contact her.. Why? because i miss the security of having her nearby, eventhough i know she is ****ing this other guy, and well it is driving me nuts because i KNOW she is getting it, while i AM NOT .. (the only reason i want back together i guess)...

I will keep ignoring her... i Just must do it..

Edit; ... arsh mann!! .. i will RESTART the challenge. why ?

because i had to contact her because of school work (which is okay) but i could not mangage NOT TO ask her to see me in the pause... She agreed, but did not know why ...

Omfg... why am i SUCH AN AFC ... SERIOUSLY... I need someone to kick my ass, before i can move any further...

 

[Bratt2230]

I ****ed Up Already!!

I could not keep the no contact, so i wrote her a text today, and asked her if she could meet up tomorrow, so that we could watch the Formula 1 Season Finaly together, she agreed, but she has alredy moved on, and found another..

It just makes me sick to think about

 

[SandHawk]

Pep talk!
For all the people on here going through the No Contact challenge: Hang in there and be sure to spin plates and/or approach new ladies! The best way to go through this challenge is by focusing your attention on new girls!

Most girls will tempt you to break the no contact challenge by texting you, by getting angry and by raging at your, her friends and your friends. DO NOT GIVE IN, SHOW HER SHE MISSED THE BOAT, even if she was the dumper. By staying on contact with you, she tries to retain her power over you and use that to stroke her own ego. Don't let that happen!

You miss her a lot and you keep having the urge of texting her? Delete her number! DO IT NOW. Pick up your phone, open the phone book and delete it. Do you receive a text from her? Delete it immediately, don't read it. Use the three second rule on this and you'll be fine.

And last but not least: Channel all your sadness, rage and whatever you have boiling in there into working on yourself. Get a new hobby, read a new book, approach new girls and have fun with them. Don't talk about your ex with these new girls, talk about having fun and do fun stuff with them.

Realize you miss her because of all the chemicals in your brain that have gone nuts. It's like stopping smoking, your body misses out chemicals it got so dependant on during your time with this girl. When you're with her, your body is releasing truckloads of neurotransmitters to make you happy, sexual and whatnot. Now that she is out of the picture, these chemicals aren't produced anymore. This effect is only temporary, and will get easier the sooner you'll start having sex with other girls. Why? Because having sex with other girls will create these chemicals again, weaken the links that refer your brain to your ex and make the process of detoxing from her easier. SO GO OUT AND F*CK SOME BRAINS OUT!

I could not keep the no contact, so i wrote her a text today, and asked her if she could meet up tomorrow, so that we could watch the Formula 1 Season Finaly together, she agreed, but she has alredy moved on, and found another..

You *****! You couldn't even last 3 days? Delete her number, delete her Facebook and whatever you must. DO IT! And cancel that appointment because it will hurt and you'll lose your dignity with her.

It just makes me sick to think about

Your weakness makes me sick. Man the f*ck up. Wanna hear something though about having a backbone? When I broke up with my gf of 9 years, I went NC the moment we handled all financial issues. Haven't spoken to her ever since, which is 3 years now. You want to know how hard that was in the beginning not to lose frame and send her some whiney text? It was HARD, but I kept my frame and persisted, because I knew, that nothing could change that around, and I must stand my ground and hold on to my dignity. Don't be such a wuss!

 

[Bratt2230]

Wow, for 9 Years ... I had mine for 2, and now i can just IMAGINE how hard it must had been for you..

I guess ill restart the counter from tommorow, since today i ****ed up ...

But mann it is hard... damn this girl is taking each part of my body, wripping it to pieces, gathering it and then jumpion on it once again...

 

[SandHawk]

Wow, for 9 Years ... I had mine for 2, and now i can just IMAGINE how hard it must had been for you..

I guess ill restart the counter from tommorow, since today i ****ed up ...

But mann it is hard... damn this girl is taking each part of my body, wripping it to pieces, gathering it and then jumpion on it once again...

What's so hard about telling her NOT to come? And then tell her that since she's with someone else, you are not interested in being friends with her and that she should stop texting you, delete your number and let you live your own life. What's so hard about that? Is that harder than getting heartbroken all the time? NO. Now man the f*ck up and tell her the appointment is cancelled and she should f*ck off.

 

[SandHawk]

Of course she moved on. Listen to this song 5x and call me in the morning.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2pg6dR1z_E

No thx, it makes my ears bleed ;_;. No offence meant, but not everyone shares your taste in music :3

 

[LuisGarcia10]

I am starting this today.

Things didn't exactly end on amicable terms, I sent an emal to her earlier having a go and she replied saying leave me alone, never contact me again etc. I replied saying don't worry you will never hear from me again. A few hours later and surprise, surprise I have an email.

The nerve of some girls absolutely amazes me.

 

[cassanova35]

one time with my ex i was close to answering her calls, but funy thing i kept looking out for her call all day and when she did call i refused to pick up it hurts but sod it has to be done. Man up !!!!!! guys dont do it dont do it....

 

[LuisGarcia10]

Last night I sent her a final email which was basically along the lines of;

I have no feelings of malice towards you, I just didn't and still don't see the point in remaining friends.

There were other things mentioned but that was the gist of it, within an hour i get;

"i just would have rather been civil and remember the good times in the relationship as we did have a good time."

That was abrubtly ignored, as will everything else she sends me in future. Make me ****ing laugh, it obviously wasn't a good enough time to prevent you from dumping me by text message was it?!

 

[LuisGarcia10]

Day 1 almost over,

NC not been broken, only a very small step I know but it's the first day since I met her that i haven't contacted her so it's a milestone, she'll probably notice that as well.

It's just ****, I want an LTR but really do not want to deal with this **** again, and I was only with the last girl for 3 months which is hardly long term!

 

[Myrrdin]

It's been 50 days since I initiated NC after 1 year of LTR. She initiated mild contact on IM and kept it like that.

Feeling the best I've felt in years. No more sucking the life out of me . No more bullsh1t, no more drama, no more nothing. FREEDOOOOM!!!!

 

[Bratt2230]

It's been 50 days since I initiated NC after 1 year of LTR. She initiated mild contact on IM and kept it like that.

Feeling the best I've felt in years. No more sucking the life out of me . No more bullsh1t, no more drama, no more nothing. FREEDOOOOM!!!!

Gratz Dude!

I am happy for your Succes !

 

[LuisGarcia10]

Day 2, still not broken NC or come close to it.

Got to admit though, it's not easy. It's helping logging into my emails and the messages she's sent me in the past have been bumped off the top page now which is good.

Just, and I know this sounds sad, but it would be easier if I had a text or email from her to ignore, just to show that it's getting to her as much as it is me, if that makes sense?