The Friend Zone from a female prospective (Internet Forum)

[Peaks&Valleys]

Saw a link to this website on another thread.

http://www.womenonlyforums.com/showthread.php/7684-The-Friendzone

What do you guys think?

Overall, I was actually pretty impressed.

 

[Valentino14]

Nothing really new to see there except stuff you should already know.

Girl says: " Unless he is gay...the hetero male friends are always looking for a chance to get in your pants..may get some flack here, but I agree wit smichal....guys and girls cannot be just friends."

She is right that orbiters want get in their pants.

Saw a link to this website on another thread.

http://www.womenonlyforums.com/showthread.php/7684-The-Friendzone

What do you guys think?

Overall, I was actually pretty impressed.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Nothing really new to see there

...except women saying that guys and girls can't be "just friends".

'Surprised' might have been a better word for it.

They all seemed to be on the same page about it too, which is what really surprised me. I'm sure that doesn't necessarily mean they would cut all orbiters/guy friends out of their lives on their own once they went exclusive with another guy, but it's a start. I liked the post near the end, where one of them explained the whole male/female "friend" dynamic, and how inherently it could never work....and she knew all of this because her husband had explained it to her.

 

[Jay Dee]

Nothing wrong with having the ladies as acquaintances, for social proof - and if you can manage it, as friends too. The Friends thing though, is some seriously advanced Juan sh1t, as your interchanges have to be a big mix or banter, flirting and charm (verbal f**k buddies I call it) to keep it 'tense' so that you're always one step away from being physical - you're not in the friendzone, but you've not been physical, yet. As they say around here, always escalate. The key is to have no feelings either way, even if they are stunning.

 

[Valentino14]

...except women saying that guys and girls can't be "just friends".

'Surprised' might have been a better word for it.

They all seemed to be on the same page about it too, which is what really surprised me. I'm sure that doesn't necessarily mean they would cut all orbiters/guy friends out of their lives on their own once they went exclusive with another guy, but it's a start. I liked the post near the end, where one of them explained the whole male/female "friend" dynamic, and how inherently it could never work....and she knew all of this because her husband had explained it to her.

A lot of girls do know that they just like the attention or the friendship. Like that one girl said when that guy tried to be more than friends she ended it. That would be the only way the guys would be cut out I think. At least she listened to the husband.

 

[Kailex]

We're surprised? OF COURSE they know orbiters want in on the action.

But they tell everyone ELSE that they are just friends and "aren't like that". She knows, she just isn't going to publicly admit it.

I think some of the posts in that thread are idiotic... "If I'm okay with the Friendzone, why can't HE be okay with it? I told him how I feel, so that should automatically make him disinterested, but he has a penis, so he can't do that."

That's the gist of some of the posts that I read.
It doesn't work like that. Every female "friend" that is attractive to me, I've wanted to bang. It doesn't matter how good our friendship is. I'd straight up just slip Lil Kailex right in there if she gave me the chance.

The only women I can be friendly with are women that are in relationships with my male friends.

 

[backbreaker]

this is an issue that a woman never will be able to truely comprehend.

my wife and i got into a mini fake arguement one night, when I was telling her about the girl that brought me here and evertyhing that happened. she was like well why can't you be like me, I had a guy that I liked and he turned me down and I was just his friend and i had no problem with that


so I was like okay millie, what did you do once he put you in the friendzone.

she was like I dated someone else.


and there you have it.


look at that woman's story

Basically, I am a catch and I know it. I am seldom rejected by a man when I want him.

I was once really good friends with this guy I used to work with. I really liked him. I wanted to date him, but he had a girlfriend even though he would flirt with me and ***** about her. Then one day he proposed to her. I realized that he obviously loves her so instead of making things weird I just appreciated our friendship.

it's really easy to do when you have a string of men coming at you to say oh well this one wasn't it, next.

but for guys who hang out with a girl and you are single you just think hey we get along, we click, hey this is it! why can't she see it too?


friendzone is a direct result of lack of options.



and i'll be honest. when i was single i took being friendzoned as a personal insult. like i'm not man enough.

 

[El Payaso]

The OP of that thread is very narcissistic. Everything is about how SHE feels. She never once considers how the GUY feels. She thinks she's attractive, a catch, can get any man she wants etc.

She's upset about the guy not wanting to be her friend because he's one of the few men to reject her. She's not used to that type of rejection. She doesn't want a friend. She wants emotional validation while she gets cawk from every other guy but him. The dude didn't want that and turned her down. Plain and simple.

 

[3agle 3yes]

This is why I always tell guys who come here for advise saying:

"There's this girl I'm seeing we text 24/7 and now she's gone distant..."

There is only ONE of three things you can be to a woman.

Friend, lover or b!tch.

If you're her FRIEND, you can't be her lover. If you're her LOVER, you can't be her friend and if you're stupid enough to attempt both...then you're her B!TCH.

Just look at this section of her post:

I was once really good friends with this guy I used to work with. I really liked him. I wanted to date him, but he had a girlfriend even though he would flirt with me and ***** about her.

Despite what she says...friends DON'T flirt with each other.

I GUARANTEE those guys that she friend-zoned DIDN'T flirt with her.

Here's proof:

...When I was going through a bad break up, one of my guy friends and I became close. Not in a sexual way, but he was there for me to listen to, a shoulder to cry on.

You CAN'T go from this, to being sexual with a woman...it just doesn't work.

We later became enemies, but it had nothing to do with his (now) wife or my feelings for him.

Anyway, going back to the guy who flirted with her and whom she was supposedly "friends" with, I find it ironic that she can't take it when SHE is friend-zoned.

Kind of DESTROYS the whole point of her thread.

 

[nismo-4]

Judge nismo on the case.

The OP of that thread is very narcissistic. Everything is about how SHE feels. She never once considers how the GUY feels. She thinks she's attractive, a catch, can get any man she wants etc.

Of course she don't care about how the guy feels. Women don't give a f**k about men's feelings. That's her not caring about rejecting us. Men can reject women too, though this is less common than the woman rejecting the man.

She's upset about the guy not wanting to be her friend because he's one of the few men to reject her. She's not used to that type of rejection. She doesn't want a friend. She wants emotional validation while she gets cawk from every other guy but him. The dude didn't want that and turned her down. Plain and simple.

The only problem is that the dude didn't get anywhere with her even after rejecting her. In reality, she rejected him first by friendzoning him. The woman may have gotten pissed off and upset, but only because she is losing her emotional tampon. Here again, she rejected him, he walked away because he didn't want to be a beta orbiter, and she likely found another chump to fill the void.

Read between the lines.

The best way out of the friendzone is not going in it.

Case closed.

 

[nismo-4]

As I viewed this thread, I kicked a woman to the curb just now.

She kept on saying that she was scared to love and be with a man. She'd change her tune if Denzel asked her out!

Anyways, she kept on saying how she just wanted to be friends and that I should be okay with that. I stated my standards and that I will not enter a platonic relationship from the start. Then she just kept going on about being my friend and nothing more. I just hung up. Then she had the nerve to call me rude for not saying goodbye. (She lost what she thought was a non-sexual emotional tampon/ beta orbiter.)

Just be a woman's friend? F**k that. I can and will walk away. Men should never be afraid of doing so.

 

[ArcBound]

This is why I always tell guys who come here for advise saying:

"There's this girl I'm seeing we text 24/7 and now she's gone distant..."

There is only ONE of three things you can be to a woman.

Friend, lover or b!tch.

If you're her FRIEND, you can't be her lover. If you're her LOVER, you can't be her friend and if you're stupid enough to attempt both...then you're her B!TCH.

This took me a long time to understand but when I did I hit myself in the head over and over for being a retard. Girls don't want you to treat them like friends. She has enough friends. If you attempt being a lover and a friend you end up with one-itis all the way through. Because you mistakenly attribute to her, the things you value from friends, and you try to use that to get into her pants. What ends up happening is you end up giving resources her way, and become the classic "beta" who tries to buy love with non-sexual actions and favors.

Only sexual actions lead to sexual relationships. A woman might fvck you if you have money, but it won't be the same as a woman fvcking you because you acted sexually towards her. That is why it is best to go the route of the lover always. If she does not respond sexually to your sexual actions then at least you know. If you go the friends route, the ambiguity is always there, and that ambiguity keeps you orbiting her! And that's what she loves, because of the ambiguity she gets free counseling, favors, validation, attention. If you go sexual she either responds to that sexuality or not, getting rid of ALL ambiguity and removing all the power from her game. That's why women get angry when their male friends disappear. They no longer get free sh!t for having a vagina.

 

[AttackFormation]

She begins her post by saying when she was little she believed men and women can't be just friends, but now she's not sure because SHE has met some guys that SHE only wants to be friends with.

That guy who went after her is a dumbass, unless she's lying to herself about how clear she was.

She doesn't understand that the friendship from the guy's side was how he thought he could get intimate with her. Without intimacy there's no point to him. But to her there is, because she knows he wants to f*ck her (ie. he's a new orbiter).

Considering the rate at which cheating occurs you can't blame the training guy entirely, for all he knows she could've been a starved wife looking to cheat. BUT, he too is a dumbass because he actually went after it. He too climbed a tree to bypass the low-hanging fruit for something at the treetop that wasn't even there if you looked from the ground.

She ends the post by saying she doesn't understand how guys' experiences can be different from hers, but clearly makes no attempt at understanding after that. Instead she basically implies that their experience is wrong because that's not how she feels.


Then along comes some dumbass poster who says these guys are led around by their p3nises. But she doesn't see the elephant in the room that her pvssy drying up around them into not having s3x is ALSO being led around by your genitals.

 

[Huffman]

For everyone, a point comes where it's YOU who will LJBF the girl. Suddenly you understand how and why it happens. I've done it and it sucks.

But if, after that, I see her still trying then I'll just break off the friendship and push her away. I'm just too nice... nobody should be an orbiter.

 

[backbreaker]

This is why I always tell guys who come here for advise saying:

"There's this girl I'm seeing we text 24/7 and now she's gone distant..."

There is only ONE of three things you can be to a woman.

Friend, lover or b!tch.

If you're her FRIEND, you can't be her lover. If you're her LOVER, you can't be her friend and if you're stupid enough to attempt both...then you're her B!TCH.

Just look at this section of her post:

Despite what she says...friends DON'T flirt with each other.

I GUARANTEE those guys that she friend-zoned DIDN'T flirt with her.

Here's proof:

You CAN'T go from this, to being sexual with a woman...it just doesn't work.

Anyway, going back to the guy who flirted with her and whom she was supposedly "friends" with, I find it ironic that she can't take it when SHE is friend-zoned.

Kind of DESTROYS the whole point of her thread.

Friend, lover or b!tch.

this is so much bullsh!t

my wife is easily the best friend I've ever had. I had 2 best friends growing up and we were like blood brothers and my wife is on an entirely different level as far as ust being a friend.



but this is what I REALLY take offense to

I GUARANTEE those guys that she friend-zoned DIDN'T flirt with her.

Here's proof:

What the FCUK is he supposed to do? "hey girl, damn that sucks you got broken up with. I hope you're okay? now can you give me a blow job lol?"


That's what hte **** normal ass people do when people break up with people they are there for comfort.


Attraction, has nothing whatsoever to do with how you console a woman after she breaks upw ith a boyfriend. This is an attempt to manufacturer attraction and you can't do that. she not looking at you like that not because you aren't making a move on her she's not looking at like that because she just isn't attracted to you.


you know how many women i've befriended that end up trying to date me? quite a few, at least 4-5 off the top of my head where i Made not ONE SEXUAL move whatsoever where they came at me and confessed they wanted to be with me in one way or the other.

I've even dated a chick that basically AFCed me. I didn't think she was ugly but I didn't think she was hot or anything. And I just got out of a rough breakup and she was really chil and we hung out all the time and one thing led to another and we started kissing and fooling around and next thing you know she was my GF. now, she was a hoe lol, but still.



men, need to come to grips with the fact that you can't win every girl. Women aren't calculations. There are going to be some women that, just aren't into you. In retrospect, the girl that brought me to this site, just wans't into me. nothing I can do about it. Im' glad she wasn't into me in retrospect, but still. I have a female friend now that I'm sure if i were single and she were single, there is nothing whatsoever I could do, to make her into me. She thinks i'm handsome, but we just don't click like that. it would be like kissing my sister or something lol.


All the game in the world, you can't account for chemistry. Either a woman feels it or she doesn't. And **** sometimes I don't feel it. I've had female firends that weren't ugly that i could tell liked me that I just weren't interested in like that.

 

[Zapp Brannigan]

The OP to that thread sounds like the egotistical type that'd be almost impossible to get, that wouldn't be worth the ****. Women tend to seek out guy friends for the ego boost, and so many guys think becoming friends first will help. It's a trap too many fall into these days. Movies and Television show guys becoming friends with women they eventually get with, and they believe they'll win over women this way. It almost never works. The guy thinks he'll be everything the woman wants, and she just plays him.

Most of the women with friendzone orbiters don't care all about their feelings. They're typically the types like the OP, who attention ***** on social media, think they're perfect 10s, and that no guy is good enough for them. The guy gets used for c**kblocking in public settings, and emotional support. Then if they finally say how they feel she breaks their heart, and acts like it's their fault eventhough she's the one who lead them on.

The only way I think friends of the opposite sex can work is if you both seem to have interest in one another, talk/flirt with them but also maintain some level of mysteriousness, and never take them out like you're dating when you're not. Even texting/talking on the phone can lead you to the friendzone, so it's best to tread lightly on that, or avoid it all together.

 

[3agle 3yes]

this is so much bullsh!t....my wife is easily the best friend I've ever had...

Yes, that's because it's your WIFE.

When you first met her were you friends first? I doubt it.

I'm not married, but I'm smart enough to know wives are entirely different to girlfriends.

What the FCUK is he supposed to do? "hey girl, damn that sucks you got broken up with. I hope you're okay? now can you give me a blow job lol?"

Nope. He should STAY AWAY from her and give her time to recover, she has FEMALE friends that will comfort her.

The whole reason why he did it was to get some, or at least that's how she saw it...that's almost always how women see it.

Attraction, has nothing whatsoever to do with how you console a woman after she breaks upw ith a boyfriend. This is an attempt to manufacturer attraction and you can't do that. she not looking at you like that not because you aren't making a move on her she's not looking at like that because she just isn't attracted to you.

Then you don't understand attraction AT ALL.

Where do you think attraction comes from? Thin air?

A woman ISN'T going to be attracted to man that comforts her after a break-up.

you know how many women i've befriended that end up trying to date me? quite a few, at least 4-5 off the top of my head where i Made not ONE SEXUAL move whatsoever where they came at me and confessed they wanted to be with me in one way or the other.

Who said it was impossible to f*ck girls who you are friends with?

It's possible but unlikely...and if it does happen it almost always ends up bad.

Also how decent were those girls?

men, need to come to grips with the fact that you can't win every girl.

Yet, you seem to be disregarding the fact that there are ways to make women more likely to be attracted to you.

All the game in the world, you can't account for chemistry. Either a woman feels it or she doesn't.

Do you even know what "chemistry" means?

Do you think it comes from thin air?

Why do you think people are on this forum?

 

[backbreaker]

dude i've banged more girls that you have hair on your nuts lol. you want to sit here and talk to me about attraction and chemistry. there is nothing you can do or not do to a woman who is breaking up with someone else, that is going to maek her think any differently about you than she already thought, either way.


if a woman thinks your are dating material = "OMG he's so sweet look at how he comforted me when I needed him that's exactly what I want out of a man"


if a woman thinks you are not dating material = "OMG he's so sweet look at how he comforted me when I needed him i could never date you and ruin our friendship look at how nice you are to me! I need you around"


the mistake in your **** logic is thinking that there is anything that you can do to make guy number 2, go to guy number 1 and there is not. I'm not saying it's impossible to go from guy number 2 to guy number 1. I'm saying that there is absolutely nothing in the aspect of how to handle her breakup with her boyfriend lol that's going to get you there.


if a woman thinks you are dating material and she you are standoffish when she has a breakup = "OMG i wonder what he's doing i always thought he was cute and he's so mysterious i like that about him"


if a woman thinks you are not dating material and you are standoffish when she has a breakup = "OMG i he's such a jerk, he didn't even call me and see how i was doing. why would I want to date anyone like that all he wants to do is get in my pants he doesn't even care about my feelings"

 

[3agle 3yes]

First of all BB attraction CAN be manufactured.

To say it can't is like saying you can't make someone laugh.

Or you can't make someone upset.

If you know the TRIGGERS you can make anyone feel anything.

Attraction is simply making a woman have the urge to have sex with you.

there is nothing you can do or not do to a woman who is breaking up with someone else, that is going to maek her think any differently about you than she already thought, either way.

There seems to be a misunderstanding.

I never said there was something they could do to change the way she thought about them.

What I said was if you're a friend to a woman you can't be her lover and if you're her lover you can't be her friend.

if a woman thinks your are dating material = "OMG he's so sweet look at how he comforted me when I needed him that's exactly what I want out of a man"

If the man behaves like a friend, this won't happen.

Friendly behaviour ISN'T attractive.

BB, you need to consider what makes a man attractive? Women don't find men attractive for no reason.

Some women date men they aren't attracted to because they are confused and don't know what they want.

However, a man a woman considers attractive NEVER behaves in a normal way towards that woman.

And second, NO decent looking woman says "OMG he's so sweet look at how he comforted me when I needed him that's exactly what I want out of a man".

Has it happened to you?

Women have and ALWAYS will be attracted to men they want to have sex with.

Comforting women when they are down does NOTHING towards this.

OMG he's so sweet look at how he comforted me when I needed him i could never date you and ruin our friendship look at how nice you are to me! I need you around"

95% of the time that would be the response a man gets when he comforts a woman and doesn't behave sexual towards her.

ASSUMING the woman is desirable.

 

[TheBossman]

I think someone from here went over and posted.

Sally_pants