Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Pluto's 'Step-by-Step' Progress Journal

Plutoman

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This is weird to look back and think on how short a time this has been.

I've also stopped noting any success, and only noting the more important successes I've had. Approaching and getting a number doesn't matter much.. good thing, I'm growing pretty nicely in what I do. I'm not caring much at all, which is appealing; first time I've had a girl offer her number to me and ask me out (apparently, she got a divorce, so I'm definitely going for it). I'm busy as heck, barely any free time, but loving life and I'm confident in what I can do when I need it.

Also considering dating L more seriously, which is supporting my lack of motivation to approach more lately, I didn't even get any numbers last weekend.
 

sageproduct

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Hey, cool stuff man.

You and Demon are around my age right? Do you like older chicks? (By that I just mean older than us lol..so 21+) I've found myself more successful w/~23 year olds than girls my age
 

Plutoman

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The girl that gave me her number is 29; the girl I'm considering dating is 29. The other, higher interest girls are 22/23.

Honestly, I'd love to nab a few 17/18 y/o's... but I've had way more luck with older gals. I think my 1 on 1 approach works better with the older girls. The younger ones, at college, are more concerned with popularity, social power, than the older girls who are more concerned with how a 1 on 1 interaction goes. I'm changing my approach a bit with the younger girls. They don't seem interested in 'dating' as it would be, more so, parties.

Demonpenz is older, but yeah, I'm 21. I like your stuff, you're working it as much as we are, it's nice for both of us to be local though. Having a wing to boost you up, that understands the failures, that motivates you towards the girls when you hesitate, is a fantastic thing (plus he's a good friend).
 

Plutoman

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Let's toss an update in here. I'll keep it fairly brief, but then open a section looking for an honest opinion.

Jenny, the 29 y/o who asked me out, flaked out on our first plans, rather rudely, claiming her kid was sick. Yep, she's a mom. No relationship potential here. I kept it cool, didn't say much and made her wait a day and a half for my reply. She's responded by (on tuesday) asking if I was free that evening, or the night after.. I said no, but I'm free Thursday, and she was excited and said she was free then, too. Hmm. May/may not go, it's ridiculously snowy outside, got a good foot of snow or more + ice.

Approach competition started, did a few, and number closed a university swimmer girl who's pretty cute with a nice body, 18 y/o. Did it in front of a buddy, his reaction was funny. He was impressed though.

Last weekend, had a girl ask me for my number, the Friday was awful, crazy snow coming down as we drove out, Saturday was mixed, I was on a roll but Demonpenz was just worn out. Not all that interested in the girl who asked for my number, though, so.. meh.

I'm feeling confident as **** now that I've had girls asking me out/for my number. It reverberates through my demeanor, too.

Anyways, onto a more serious question.
 

Plutoman

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L, the other gal I've been dating for a little while, had a small rough patch with her, smoothed it over quickly, another patch has popped up.

The reason the rough patches are coming up are because she's looking for more signs of commitment before she gets attached. I know she likes me a heck of a lot, her actions match her words. The question is, should I seriously date her? I'm leaning towards this. Don't get me wrong when you read this, I'm not considering marrying the girl (I'd need to know her way better than I do now). But I know where she's headed, so if I enter a LTR with her it'd be on the table at some point, and if I was clearly considering not even touching the subject, I wouldn't want to waste her time. Thus, it needs to be considered.

I'll summarize;
  • She has a master's degree, very nice career, makes very good money.
  • She's a fun girl, enjoys drinking casually but has enough sense to not get trashed. Enjoys all kinds of fun games, good taste in movies.
  • Mostly female friends, her career is very female dominated. She has only, eh, once or twice made a disparaging comment about a female friend. In other words, rare.
  • She's very pretty. Picture is worth many words. https://dl.dropbox.com/u/56852942/l.png Perfect waist/hip ratio.
  • Very few slut tells. I got a sense of a couple, namely with reference to how she used to be in the past and now she's not so carefree, but I've also seen tells that her carefree lifestyle was more of 'she dated people she wasn't interested in marrying', not 'she had lots of one night bar stands'. Not positive though, I'm about 75% sure of this.
  • Independent, but believes in a christian marriage and is willing to set aside her independence for a more traditional relationship of male dominance. Plus, she's very obviously tired of first date's with beta's that don't know how to lead. I've clearly expressed my views.
  • She understands my humor. Good lord, this is key. She keeps up with the banter, and is able to have fun back.
  • She's very feminine. She acts it and lives it. She's liberal, but moderately conservative in male/female relations and is not a feminist (biblical relations do not agree with a chunk of feminism).
  • She's very kind. She volunteers at clinics, she's environmentally conscious, she helps people in general. It's part of her personality. She's currently taken in a few animals while also volunteering at a vet clinic at least once a week. She recently took in a girl to stay at her house that had some issues and needed a place to stay for a couple weeks, a fellow church-goer (she's out by now, but it happened just a month ago).

In other words, pretty/smart/fun/funny/traditionally inclined/eats healthy/stays in shape.

Cons;
  • She wants to settle down. Her timeframe is much shorter than I'd anticipate. She'll want kids fairly soon. I'm not an *******; I don't want to date her, dump her in a year, and waste her time, which means I'd be tacitly agreeing to at least some of her timetable in dating her.
  • She's religious. She wants me on the same page as her religiously. On one side, this is a good thing - if she believes in biblical marriage, I'm at much less risk for issues. On the other, I have to deal with religion when I've never been all that religious. It's a dealbreaker for her, she wants that as part of her life. Current decisions revolve around this.
  • She's 8 years older than I am.

Am I a fool for even considering this? I'm sure it's fairly evident that I like her, I've not met someone I've had so much fun with (more so than my BPD ex, without the numerous issues), I enjoy being around, who can keep up with my banter (in a fun way, without resorting to insults/rudeness). I've got enough options that I'm willing to talk away if I have something bad. She knows I have options, she thinks I'm a player.

I'm very much leaning towards seriously dating her. I like her, and for good reasons. Have to decide when to get back to her. I told her I'll consider the religious aspect, and if I ask her out again, she'll know my decision, if not.. she'll also know my decision. She expressed that if I don't want to deal with that now, to please get in touch with her later.. she's leaving the door open. It's only been a couple days.. but when I decide, I make a decision. Not gonna diddle around the bush. I'd prefer not to play so many games with her, either.
 
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Darth

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Plutoman said:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showpost.php?p=2008316&postcount=65

Yeah, she's a sweet girl. I'm pausing because me, I'm 21, I've gotten into the game fairly recently, so it's like.. if I find a girl that's great so fast, am I cashing out early? Or did I just luck out? Am I missing part of the picture?
You know this reminds me of Christmastime when I was a kid. One year we went into the Christmas tree farm to find a tree and after 2 minutes, we found the perfect tree. But we couldn't believe that it was that easy because we found it so fast, so we left the tree and went out looking for another one.

We wandered around for a couple of hours and eventually wound up settling for a lesser tree because we lost the one that we found originally. But the point is, it was all because we thought the hunt was too easy/over too quickly. However it had nothing to do with the quality of the tree.

Just 1. be real and 2. always dominate her whether you are dating/engaged/married, whatever, and you will do fine:)

And hey, becoming more religious (believing in God and etc.) can only be a good thing IMO. Of course I already am religious. But the choice is up to you, just make sure it's what you want to do and you're not being manipulated, not that that would happen.
 

Plutoman

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Very good perspective & analogy. It's a good point. It's like winning a small lottery, and then spending all the winnings on trying to win the bigger lottery. It's still a gamble. Risk vs reward; is the potential reward I could get by another girl worth the risk of losing this one? Why would someone gamble $800 for a 50% chance of winning $1000?

I'd rather have a single relationship; it's more stable, I don't have the time to consistently take other girls on dates and I'd rather take a girl on a date that I really enjoy being around, versus one that I just want to sleep with.

I'm still finishing the approach competition, regardless, but I think I do want to pursue this and see where it takes me. And considering the age, it works in my favor.. it's easy to keep that in mind. I'm not going to hurt by walking away at 24, I'd still be making the same gamble I am now. And if she's really not all that great in the end, I'm not going to feel as bad for walking away (I'd still feel, but I'd walk away for a good reason) - and if she is a great girl, then there's no reason to walk away. In other words, it'll be easier to not put up with tests. Taking the lead isn't a problem at all, anyways.

Thanks for the opinion, it's very helpful.
 

Plutoman

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Decision made.

Plans made for saturday night.

It's interesting to see the script flipped. I've never had so much direct control over how the relationship works and goes. She's set a couple boundaries, but otherwise, the control in every aspect has been mine.
 

Plutoman

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Date with Leah was fantastic, went to a small hole in the wall for some light dinner, then went home and watched a movie. She was a bit sick, so she fell asleep a few times in my arms. Kind of adorable. Got plenty of physical action goin', no description needed. Lots of solid talking.

Girl chased me all over today. Went over to Jason's Deli, cashier there was flirting with me.. then she made an excuse to come over to my table and talk to me.. then brought food over when she got off work to sit down with me.. Then went over to the Starbucks I work at, and then talked to me there.. She was so enamored with me. Gave her my number. She texted me a little later with a bunch of stuff, and closed it off with "I think you are really sweet, and I want to see you more! Lolol. (And cute)". 17 y/o high school girl. Bam.

Yep, age of consent is 16 here, I'm 21.. fair game. Did a bit of text flirting, she's pretty into me, asking if I was single/etc.
 

Plutoman

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17 y/o won't leave me alone. I'm putting up with it for now, as I'd like to land her, but it's seriously annoying. I don't think I should tell her where I live.. and she knows where I work already.

Went out with Leah again for lunch Monday, and the evening Tuesday. Had a good time, as usual. Growing to appreciate her more and more, leaning more and more towards exclusivity. Gonna see where things lead with the young'n, and probably close things off pretty quick, I don't want her getting attached, she already seems way too intent, and continue on with Leah and see where life takes the two of us.

Never transitioned off the dating scene to a relationship, so it's a bit odd. My major relationship, we never really dated.
 

Plutoman

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So, just a little update after talking to bradd.. gonna summarize my time here. I've skipped on a few interesting reports, because it gets annoying writing up full descriptions of everything, especially if I was drinking and don't remember it all in vivid detail.

All in all: 22 numbers, dates with a few girls, countless approaches (in the hundreds, 300+ easy at an estimate, I've definitely played a numbers game, but this counts all approaches - only 50-60 were longer than a minute or two), 3 girls blatantly approaching me and asking me out.

Cold approach -> steady semi-girlfriend right now, the confidence I've built has translated into several plates. Any girl I find interesting, I talk too. I approach, I don't care. Doesn't mean I approach every girl, but every girl that sparks some bit of interest, I find a way to approach her. I've got the general attitude that - I don't care. Simple enough. I've got enough girls interested, I can get numbers with ease, that if I get **** from a girl, I just move on to another. If she's boring, I don't care, I just move on. Maybe it's too early for that attitude, who knows? I'm not banging girls left and right, I'm not pulling girl after girl from the bar (but I know I can - maybe that helps, was easy as heck to pull a girl home, but I didn't care - was too drunk to **** her). 7/8 numbers go absolutely nowhere. So is my confidence unwarranted? Got no idea. I still feel it.

I really need to focus on uni more, and I'm really more of a relationship person. I just don't care for random hookups, unless I'm drunk, in which case all bets are off. I can't do a one-nighter while sober off a girl I just met in a bar. I just feel awkward. I'd rather have a girl I appreciate in multiple facets, and go out with her. Don't get me wrong; I'm an extraordinarily physical guy, and I damn well love sex, but I also just prefer to have my own level of comfort with a girl before I sleep with her.

Not only that, I'm operating out of my parents house with a broken '96 sedan for a vehicle and a part-time starbucks salary while still in uni. And most of my game is on girls outside of college. Man, I'm doing pretty good I think. No wonder I'm confident. It only gets easier from here, I'd say. With all that though I'm liking the idea of just having a steady girlfriend and dropping the rest of my plates. I'm not sure what the future holds, but I'm pretty damn sure that if things go south, I'll be right there for getting new ones, and if things go well, it's because I'm with a good girl that warrants it. Actually, not 'pretty sure', I'm quite positive I can pull more girls whenever I need. I'm not desperate for it, which I think is a pretty big key, I'm just relaxed because I know I'll get them if I need them.

Tonight: Went out with a buddy after meeting Demonpenz at Perkins, said **** it to classes and had a couple glasses of Bailey's, ended up making out with a model. She's 10 years my senior, has kids (single mom), pretty much a total *****, though, so I didn't pursue.. just don't care all that much. Hell, this is her pic on facebook: link not really safe for work. My friend's known her for a while, she's liked him. I've been pulling girls from guys a lot lately, I came real close to that Friday night (we partied till 7:30am, nearly pulled a girl from a guy, but.. he had home field advantage, he was the only guy she knew, they were out together in the first place, if he was a bit more of a chump it would have happened. As it was, I think I only managed to ****-block him. <_<).

She likes her orbiters, too, here's a snippet of our chat.
"Wait, are you friends with [common friend] on facebook? Why aren't you friends with me!"
"I don't add girls to facebook until I get to know them well."
"You should add me on facebook!"
"Do you remember my name?"
"Umm... [awkward silence]. No, but you can look me up!"
"You can add me on facebook when you can remember my name."

She later turned towards my friend, said "Damn, I like this guy, I can't believe he said that."
 

Plutoman

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Rocked out this evening. Game was good.

Photobombed a group of girls, birthday party. Had some long chats, dragged the birthday girl over to play basketball with me on a machine, stole one of her birthday cupcakes. Had a friend take a picture of us and her send the picture to my phone, told her we should grab a drink in lawrence (my college town).

Another girl, just seemed to be digging me.. either that or she was just being more social than I expected with her group of friends. After chatting for a while, about to leave, I went to her and said "Hey, we've got a problem.. you forgot to give me your number, so we can hang out sometime." So she said we'd better fix that, told her I'll get in touch sometime and we'll grab a drink.

Could've pulled several other numbers, but.. got lazy, said **** it, didn't want to put in the work. The latter one was the hottest, too, superb blonde girl, at least an 8, if not higher; I'd have to see her in a different light to see that. The prior was about a 7. Very nice rack, nice body, only a decent face (but still quite decent, it just wasn't 'hot').

Didn't care for anything more, so we all bounced out of the area before midnight or so. Lots of birthdays and girl's nights out, I like it, I can get it, impress them all, number grab, and move out. And I'm more likely to hear back, as they are less likely to bang some random dude when they are out having fun with their girlfriends (logistics and all), and not many guys can get in and impress/befriend the whole group.
 

Plutoman

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Took Nite out to the plaza, sat down with a girl at the starbucks there. She was really closed up, but after a good 10 minutes of steady prompting, and dropping hints, she started opening up and talking. She's a bit more.. odd than I usually go for, she's got the lip stud, dark hair, some dark eyeliner, ever so slight goth look, but she seemed pretty cool anyways. Got her number, seems promising. Talked for quite a while for sure.

On the other note, I was out with L for the evening, had a great time. Was supposed to go out to a bar, but ended up not even making it out of her apartment. Watched a movie and got tipsy and well, the rest of the evening needs no explanation.
 

Plutoman

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Saw L last Thursday.. the intended hour and a half visit turned quickly into 6 hours... morning text = "Hey, I had a good time with you last night. Thanks for coming over. Of course, I am tired and my body hurts pretty much everywhere, but I am still glad you were here."

Such a sweetie.

Anyways. Tried to game a stripper last Friday, ended up unsuccessful. Sucked a bit, as I had passed on a decent girl to game the stripper (the other girl was a smart girl, cute, microbiology major, more interesting). Ah well, you win some, you lose some. Still doing the AA competition, got my first complete rejection (ie, no boyfriend/etc reason) to a number close from a model at a car show, felt pretty good. She lived like 2 hours out anyways. I dropped the 17 y/o, too weird, and the other older gal was just annoying, she'd flake and then try to arrange another meet. Then she'd flake again. Since I never made committed plans and had other options, it was cool, but really, it wasn't worth the time to even set something up.

Cutting back on it all as I'm entering exclusive territory with L, and I don't mind that really as she's a great, fun, pretty girl, and I'm not going to cheat on her. So for now any practice will come from approaches, number closes, and not any follow ups.

Yep, I'll be a **** and number close a girl and never call. Sounds fine to me. I'll get numbers occasionally, though, just to keep me on my toes, and keep options open, even while I'm not dating other girls.

And on another note, seeing L Friday night and doing a hike with her Saturday morning. Might stay the night there.
 

Plutoman

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Spontaneous lunch meet with L, had a good time. Text discussion later, I told her she has to earn her compliments and that they'll be on my terms. So she's been sending me all kinds of pictures, both sexy, generally good, and the embarrassing ones in order to earn her compliments.

Transitioned into a conversation about training and training her just as I would a dog. I made note of commonly needing to show dominance - but don't worry, that comes naturally to me. She agreed, but pointed out if I was being dominant I wouldn't let her in bed with me.. I told her that's the reward, and I put her there. I don't 'let her in the bed'. Which is true, I think every time we've gone there I picked her up and carried her.

Anyways, miscellaneous thoughts floating around my head, all the fun stuff, for my little internal blog here.
 

Plutoman

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And back to square one with Madison. Ran into her at the library (I've had it happen several times on occasion, maybe once every week and a half). Talked for a bit, I'm always courteous and friendly. Then she asked me if I'd like to grab lunch with her. Lunch was nice, just interesting. Told her to text me. Still not sure if that'll happen, but it's ironic as I'm going into a more committed relationship. Pretty sure she was impressed at my newer lifestyle, which is more high-rolling, more interesting by far, I have lists of things I do each week and new experiences.

She was one of the cooler girls I'd met. Very bright girl, short cute dirty blonde, thin build but solid D-cups, introverted girl. She's also religious, just less so than L. On the flip side she's only 20. A bit annoyed as I was put in the backburner while she settled things with her ex, but meh. I'll just see what happens, I'm seeing L tonight anyways.

I guess I'll see just where it goes before jumping to conclusions or thinking on decisions.
 

Plutoman

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Yep, M here asked to hang out. Considering the circumstances in which I cut it off with her, that definitely means interest. For the first time I'm going to have two girls that I actually both like. Odd situation to be in, wasn't really expecting it. Though I should, I knew she liked me. I hate any idea of having to choose though, but L isn't going to be down for other girls past a certain point ( she's not saying anything on it now, but I know it'd bother her if I brought up other girls). M is definitely a girl that will want a relationship and not a temporary boyfriend. Too much choice. Hah!
 

Plutoman

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Met L's friends last night. Apparently I was a hit, don't know any more than that at the moment though as Demonpenz and I let them have their girls night out.

Plans for Tuesday. M's wanting to hang out, texting, very suggestive/flirty.. won't get back till the 24th or so though. Plan is to go on a date or two with her, see how it goes, and see which girl I like more.. though my gut says I'll go with Leah, she's just been more steady and reliable.
 
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