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Number ----> 1st Date

TheException

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There are two goals when it comes to setting the 1st date with a woman.

1)Secure a SPECIFIC CONFIRMED date with an interested woman

2)Root out uninterested women and discard them


Keep these two things in mind as we move forward.






So you were able to snatch a hot woman's phone number...NICE! But the game is just beginning. This little transition from turning numbers into dates is probably one of the most troubled areas for most men. There are a variety of reasons from being too needy all the way to being too distant.

THIS IS A REAL "ROUGH SKETCH" MENTALITY of how I set up 1st dates with ease. What do I mean by real? I mean this is something I ACTUALLY DO. This is not some "theory" thread or a "I think you should do this because I think it would work" thread...NO.....this is actually tested and approved. This is not some KJ thread.


A)THE WAIT
So you just got the girl's phone number Saturday night at the bar....well how long should you wait? No longer than 2-3 days. So in this example I would contact her either Tuesday or Wednesday. Any sooner and you risk showing way too much interest way too soon. Wait any longer and you either tend to run into the whole "who is this again" or come off as uninterested and are only looking for sex.(which actually may in fact be the case;either way its best the girl not feel this is true).

B)THE TEXT
I'm not going to sit here and explain to you why texting is superior to calling by phone. The list is endless. If you are dead set on being a "phone call" guy you can still proceed. The key when making first contact is to bring up something relevant to the conversation when you first met. It's the best icebreaker especially if you can make it "witty". Also vaporizes the whole "who is this again" obstacle.

*conversation was about midgets in clown suits*

Exception: Got any "small" friends? I know someone hiring clowns.

HB: Hahaha omfg no! Your too funnyyy



And your off....

Doesn't even need to be that funny to be honest. A woman will make it funny in her head if she truly finds your attractive.

After the initial text, stay on this topic for only 2-3 exchanges and then move into setting up a date. You actually have to have one in mind before you initiate. Even though it gets a bad rep....I love dinner and a movie for first dates. Just a personal preference, so you don't have to set this up as a date if you abhor dinner+movies. Regardless of what you decide it should be smooth and confident....as if she already has said yes.

Exception: So I was recommended this restaurant called "xyz" by a friend. Lets go Thursday night(or whatever weeknight would be about 2-3 days away) and catch a movie after.

HB: Omg that place is so good. Youll love it. Im game :)

Exception: Cool. 7pm.



Very direct....confident....and you must leave zero room for "wiggle". What's wiggle? Wiggle is any time a girl can use a detail(or lack thereof) to slip out of the date. A time, day, and place MUST BE CLEAR AND ESTABLISHED and SHE MUST ACCEPT. Saying "that place is awesome" is not confirmed. She must say

"Im in"
"Im game"
"Sounds good"
etc


C)Time Up To 1st Date

NEVER INIATE CONTACT!!!!!

That's right. Once you set the confirmed date, you do not text her AGAIN. None of this "but what if she forgets" or "What about a confirmation text?". Trust me....NEVER....has an interested woman "forgot" about a date with me. They bookmark that sh1t 1,000 times and set up countdowns and all other things when they have a date with an attractive man(exaggeration obviously). Attractive men are far and few. And you are one of them! She is truly lucky that you wish to be in her presence.

What if she texts you?

Text back. Its a huge mistake to ignore or "pretend to be busy" here. Don't make it super awkward either. Exchange some texts, be ****y funny, be witty, be charming and this actually will INCREASE your attractiveness before a date! Don't be short on purpose. Im not saying sit there and text all night, but don't force an exit from the conversation. As soon as you are bored or the conversation ends....DONT SEEK TO CONTINUE IT.....LET IT DIE NATURALLY.

Never force the conversation to continue. That is her job if she wants. Even then....I will shut the conversation down if shes going entirely too long.(this is only time). But there is nothing wrong with exchanging 8-10 texts here.

D) JUST SHOW UP
Nervous, anxious, "what ifs", fear.....I know. A multitude of feelings as you get ready for your date. Just show up....everything will take care of itself. Don't send a confirmation text like

Exception: On my way!!!

NEVER DO THIS. Just show up....


QUICK HITTERS
1)What if she counteroffers a different day because she is busy?
Take it if you are available. Don't force yourself or change your schedule. A counteroffer is a good sign and I will believe a woman if she says she is busy.

2)She doesn't send a confirmation text?
So what....just show up.

3)She flakes last minute.
95% this is disinterest. It is very rare for me to grant a woman a second chance if she does this. In the rare event that she apologizes profusely and counteroffers....I will accept....only if I am free. If not I may give her a different day and time, but I will not sit here and play 20 counteroffers.

4)She doesn't show up.
*deletes phone number; proceeds into venue and strikes up conversation with a different woman*

5)She shows hesitation about accepting date offer
Will keep number....but won't contact. I think its actually a huge mistake to prematurely delete phone numbers. I reserve this for extremely disrespectful women. Can't tell you how many times I will receive a text MONTHS LATER from a woman, and then proceeded to have sex with her. Had I replied with a "who is this" because I had deleted her number....it would be game over.

6)She blows up your phone with texts
Probably just a needy or insecure girl. After the first exchange post date setup...I would then keep things short on purpose. Looking for an early exit often. Constant texting will kill attraction.



Just remember the two goals. If you accomplish either one...you succeed. I tried to answer as many questions as possible under the "quick hitters" section. If you guys have additional scenarios just ask in comments and I will try to answer.
 

Greasy Pig

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There's a lot of gold here for the aspiring DJ. Maybe even some of the older ones too!
 

TheException

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Social_Leper said:
Aren't you in a committed LTR?
Yes
PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
Pretty non controversial except considering showing up to a date with zero day-of confirmation...no thanks haha maybe in college where the date is at the dining hall.
I used to be like you are....I always wanted to make sure because I didnt want to be "no showed" on. What I found actually is high interested women will confim text ME. It just seems to work better and set the right frame for the date that she is the chasee.
Agree with it in theory though particularly to avoid dependency on daily communication from them. the only real benefit to continue contact with them is that it does reduce the likelihood of a flake to increase rapport, for example I am meeting a girl 2 hours away on Saturday and I am 100% sure she will show up because of our rapport.
Yes :up:

Texting is ok. I think its actually a huge mistake to avoid texting conversation and just try to get a date and avoid all contact until then. I don't subscribe to the whole "texting kills attraction"....I subscribe to "pathetic/needy texting kills attraction".
I also like dinner (read:disguised drinks) and a movie(read: cheap hotel room) for a date even though women generally do not like it on paper. Comedy clubs are your best bet for the easy lay but bill will be $100. either way you are hedging your bets because you get to do something that you wanted to do anyway
Ya I think women expect dinner and a movie because it's what society has projected as a first date. So, worst case scenario she is neutral to it. The gamble with picking something like a comedy club on a first date is what if she hates comedy? Or whichever activity you pick? (ie rock climbing, golfing, bowling etc). Rarely do women hate food(drinks) and a movie.
Greasy Pig said:
There's a lot of gold here for the aspiring DJ. Maybe even some of the older ones too!
:up: You never know who can gain wisdom from a thread.
 

TheException

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Social_Leper said:
So either you're cheating on your gf or this is another "hypothetical" scenario that hasn't actually happened to you in real life - a la keyboard jockeying?
It's called an example.

I didn't memorize every text exchange from every woman I've ever dated.

Whenever Ive ever set up a date, its gone just like I've stated. So I guess it's not "real" enough for you in this exact example. I'll post my text exchange when I set up the next date with my girlfriend, just for you Social. :rolleyes:
dk1990S111 said:
thanks for this, definitely applies to where I am at this morning haha
:up:

Update me. I'd love to hear how it goes.
 

BrainDamage92

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Ye I like to keep it short:

1. Meet a girl you like.

2. Tell her you like her and make an appointment. She will 100 % try to change the appointment date\time, dont fall for it. Be a man. Make the plan.

3. Go to the date, act all gentleman and well mannered, then go physical. This creates cogniative dissonanse and she will be hones because it ****s her brain. If she is not interested an playing for attention or is in a relationship and planned to cheat\get attention she will be all like "nononononon",

if she really likes you she will be happy and wont get enough of you.

This what I do, keep a nice conversation and then BAM. Always makes them go honest.

Ofc you can still **** "commited" or "playing for attention" hoes but its really not worth it. I lately go for girls who have embraced their sexuality, the ones who play saints are always the worst *****s imo, and dont know jack **** about life. Met 2 girls so far following that rule, both perverted as me, both very intelligent and managing their own lives. The good kind of women. You need people who think like you around you man, dont look at looks, look at brains.

But ye, Im a handsome mother****er so that helps.
 

dk1990S111

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TheException said:
Update me. I'd love to hear how it goes.
so far texting has gone ok, not exactly what I was hoping for but I am not worried about it. If you saw my thread the last thing I heard from her is that she is busy with work and moving right now. A few guys here dont seem to believe that she could be busy but I would say that she probably really doesnt have time to be thinking about dating right now between her busy work schedule and moving out from her/her exs place.

"1)What if she counteroffers a different day because she is busy?
Take it if you are available. Don't force yourself or change your schedule. A counteroffer is a good sign and I will believe a woman if she says she is busy. "

I do think that a lot of times that saying shes busy is bs and a sign that her interest in you isnt high enough but when I know that she is moving this week then ya I will take her word for it that she is really busy.
 

Peña

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
if you use online dating you will see that women do not like dinner and movies
Dinner and movie is boring, too expensive for online date. Get a drink for cheap.
 
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