I fukked up. I admit it. I'm laying it out on the line and if you want to take shots feel free, but I would rather get some constructive input, por favor....
So based upon my face to face interaction with the 22yo, and my "other" contact with her over the last couple of months, I now know that she is officially trying to use me. Not blatantly of course, but I can see through it.
The lesson here- past attraction sometimes has little bearing on future attraction.
This chick was SMITTEN by my presence in the past, so I took for granted that when she said she was still interested that it would mean that I could have my cake and eat it too by "dating" a college chick for awhile.
Last week she invited me to come visit her for a weekend at school. But there was something about her saying "It will be great! On Friday night we can go out to dinner and on Saturday we can do this and that and yadayada" that didn't sit well with me, and i made the decision to put an end to the little fantasy charade.
Now I don't have a problem with doing this, but since she has no cell and lives a great distance away, our communication was limited to AIM for the most part. That's another thing....I got tired of talking to her on there when I knew she was talking to three other people at the same time. One of those annoying traits a multi-tasking college chick has that doesn't sit well with me.
So I basically shut down my AIM.
She's used to seeing me on there every day, since I still use my AOL email for a few things and I just let it run all day.
So what's going to happen is she is going to contact me asking whats up, where I have been, etc.
I don't have any desire to go into the details with her, as it will fall on deaf ears and only serve to make me look weak and pu$$ified. If it were up to me I would let the whole thing fade away quietly and forget about it, but I know that within a few days she will try to hit me up on myspace, and if I don't respond she will start calling. There is no doubt that I mean "something" to her, but not in the came way as in the past.
So how do I handle this without burning bridges and looking like a chump?
My initial thoughts are to simply state that I'm busy and I don't have time to communicate with her on AIM, and that I am in the process of re-prioritizing my life and unfortunately some things are going to have to give, but I know that this sounds WEAK to a woman.
What's the best way to explain to her that I have no desire to continue to pretend that we might "have something", and that I don't really care to be in contact with her in the capacity that I have been for awhile now?
Keep in mind that my new policy is to NOT burn bridges. Also, I am planning to meet up with a friend of hers in a few weeks when I am going to be in her city for a convention, so I don't want to stir up too much sh!t cause honestly this other chick is HOT and sweet and I'm looking forward to hanging out with her.
Is there any way to bow out gracefully?
So based upon my face to face interaction with the 22yo, and my "other" contact with her over the last couple of months, I now know that she is officially trying to use me. Not blatantly of course, but I can see through it.
The lesson here- past attraction sometimes has little bearing on future attraction.
This chick was SMITTEN by my presence in the past, so I took for granted that when she said she was still interested that it would mean that I could have my cake and eat it too by "dating" a college chick for awhile.
Last week she invited me to come visit her for a weekend at school. But there was something about her saying "It will be great! On Friday night we can go out to dinner and on Saturday we can do this and that and yadayada" that didn't sit well with me, and i made the decision to put an end to the little fantasy charade.
Now I don't have a problem with doing this, but since she has no cell and lives a great distance away, our communication was limited to AIM for the most part. That's another thing....I got tired of talking to her on there when I knew she was talking to three other people at the same time. One of those annoying traits a multi-tasking college chick has that doesn't sit well with me.
So I basically shut down my AIM.
She's used to seeing me on there every day, since I still use my AOL email for a few things and I just let it run all day.
So what's going to happen is she is going to contact me asking whats up, where I have been, etc.
I don't have any desire to go into the details with her, as it will fall on deaf ears and only serve to make me look weak and pu$$ified. If it were up to me I would let the whole thing fade away quietly and forget about it, but I know that within a few days she will try to hit me up on myspace, and if I don't respond she will start calling. There is no doubt that I mean "something" to her, but not in the came way as in the past.
So how do I handle this without burning bridges and looking like a chump?
My initial thoughts are to simply state that I'm busy and I don't have time to communicate with her on AIM, and that I am in the process of re-prioritizing my life and unfortunately some things are going to have to give, but I know that this sounds WEAK to a woman.
What's the best way to explain to her that I have no desire to continue to pretend that we might "have something", and that I don't really care to be in contact with her in the capacity that I have been for awhile now?
Keep in mind that my new policy is to NOT burn bridges. Also, I am planning to meet up with a friend of hers in a few weeks when I am going to be in her city for a convention, so I don't want to stir up too much sh!t cause honestly this other chick is HOT and sweet and I'm looking forward to hanging out with her.
Is there any way to bow out gracefully?