I have a huge problem which I am certain is not just limited to myself. I am beginning to wonder what a modern woman wants, and after reading your articles on such varied topics, I am convinced they honestly want everything, and then more. Perhaps I am wrong, but I am fast losing my sense of self worth as I am left wondering am I simply a dildo with an income? My wife of some 5 years my junior used to be proud of me, tell her friends how wonderful I was, shower me with affection, hugs, kisses etc and ensured I knew I was hers and she was proud of it. Fast forward, and she is now in her mid twenties, possessing a determination towards self achievement, ambition and drive. I am supportive of her in her achieving her goals, but to what degree does a man lose his place in a modern relationship?
I am now expected to clean, cook, tidy and do the washing around the house, plus earn the main income for the family while she studies on her courses. She no longer wants me speaking with her friends, nor does she want me associating much with her family. She says I simply am not good with communication skills. Due to work commitments, I have few friends of my own and my life is now becoming shallow and meaningless. She doesn’t like going out with me, says I am boring. She will stop me in mid sentence before I finish something, stating; “I know what you’re about to say”, or “you say the same thing all the time”.
For those asking do I love her, absolutely without question. For those asking does she clean and tidy and wash, yes – so in that respect the chores in the house are shared. But it’s the things like, she is too tired to make love after studying, or we make love only when she is excited which seems few and far between. I am not disheartened by the fact our income is solely derived from my work, but do feel lost when the overall picture is that I am trying to be part of her life and she is locking me out of so many doors except for the laundry and cleaning cupboards.
So I guess my problem is simply put, at what point does a guy actually stand up and put a foot down, and for the ladies out there, how would you want your guy to put his feelings across without hurting yours? I do not want to finish my relationship, I want it to bloom into a flower again, I just don’t know how.
Unhappy hubby