The Karate Kid
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2010
- Messages
- 60
- Reaction score
- 1
Hey guys, im bumming hardcore right now, and wicked depressed and i cant seem to get out of it. I could really use some inspiration if y'all could help..
Backstory as to why im depressed:
In the summer of 2010, i was on top of the world, I had my money in order, i was moving into my own place in Boston, and going back to school to earn my degree, I was getting ready for my first mma fight(didnt happen, got injured). I basically just had **** going for me. everyone could tell, women were all over me, it was great
Just before i moved down there, i met this chick, G, we hit it off pretty well and she instantly fell for me the day we met(what she claimed after we ended). I didnt think much of it, as i had no desire for a relationship, figuring i was going to get to Boston and make the city my *****.
Well i kept seeing G, and she would literally drive an hour and a half down to boston to see me for a night, only to have to drive an hour away for school, it didnt matter to her, since she was nuts about me.
And then something happened, and everything changed. I for some reason, whether it was school, loneliness from a new city, or some deep personal issues, fell apart, and quickly, my entire life started to come undone. I questioned everything and lost all the confidence i had built up.
Somehow in my head i justified that if i got the girl back who i was dating before G, i would be able to find my magic again. I now know that I irrationally thought that if i dated the girl who I saw when i was on top of the world, i would get that feeling back. ****ing Ridiculous. And blew up in my face.
Anyway, G kept being there for me, trying her heart out to save me from whatever had come over me, while i continued to push her away, until at one point, she jsut stopped. And all of her love and passion for me turned to anger and annoyance. She said she "finally got hurt." I ended up losing a girl who i had the potential to have a great thing with...
And since all this happened, I left school(tentatively going back this fall), got my life completely off track, worked **** jobs, pushed G totally away(i couldnt forgive myself for my mistakes and kept bringing up the past and the old us...for a year). I also started dating another girl, but it was only a matter of time before my baggage made me push her away as well.
G now wont talk to me because she thinks i need to get my act together, and that im no good for her or anyone until i do(this also just happened to be when she met someone whom she is really into). I know that no man should value someone this much, I just cant seem to let go of her because of all the good she brought to my life. I dont have attachment issues with any other girl, either.
End of Story
I just cant seem to get it together. Im so mired in my mistakes, and regrets over ****ing my life up, and losing probably the only person who has been there for me whenever i needed her(even up until 3 weeks ago, she was always there if i needed her). It's literally torturing me. Eveyrthing that i had going has gone to hell
Ive hit rock bottom, and I just dont feel like i cant get out of this. Any advice you guys have would help a lot. I just dont know what to do to get my mind right. Its been a year and a half, and nothings changed.
Backstory as to why im depressed:
In the summer of 2010, i was on top of the world, I had my money in order, i was moving into my own place in Boston, and going back to school to earn my degree, I was getting ready for my first mma fight(didnt happen, got injured). I basically just had **** going for me. everyone could tell, women were all over me, it was great
Just before i moved down there, i met this chick, G, we hit it off pretty well and she instantly fell for me the day we met(what she claimed after we ended). I didnt think much of it, as i had no desire for a relationship, figuring i was going to get to Boston and make the city my *****.
Well i kept seeing G, and she would literally drive an hour and a half down to boston to see me for a night, only to have to drive an hour away for school, it didnt matter to her, since she was nuts about me.
And then something happened, and everything changed. I for some reason, whether it was school, loneliness from a new city, or some deep personal issues, fell apart, and quickly, my entire life started to come undone. I questioned everything and lost all the confidence i had built up.
Somehow in my head i justified that if i got the girl back who i was dating before G, i would be able to find my magic again. I now know that I irrationally thought that if i dated the girl who I saw when i was on top of the world, i would get that feeling back. ****ing Ridiculous. And blew up in my face.
Anyway, G kept being there for me, trying her heart out to save me from whatever had come over me, while i continued to push her away, until at one point, she jsut stopped. And all of her love and passion for me turned to anger and annoyance. She said she "finally got hurt." I ended up losing a girl who i had the potential to have a great thing with...
And since all this happened, I left school(tentatively going back this fall), got my life completely off track, worked **** jobs, pushed G totally away(i couldnt forgive myself for my mistakes and kept bringing up the past and the old us...for a year). I also started dating another girl, but it was only a matter of time before my baggage made me push her away as well.
G now wont talk to me because she thinks i need to get my act together, and that im no good for her or anyone until i do(this also just happened to be when she met someone whom she is really into). I know that no man should value someone this much, I just cant seem to let go of her because of all the good she brought to my life. I dont have attachment issues with any other girl, either.
End of Story
I just cant seem to get it together. Im so mired in my mistakes, and regrets over ****ing my life up, and losing probably the only person who has been there for me whenever i needed her(even up until 3 weeks ago, she was always there if i needed her). It's literally torturing me. Eveyrthing that i had going has gone to hell
Ive hit rock bottom, and I just dont feel like i cant get out of this. Any advice you guys have would help a lot. I just dont know what to do to get my mind right. Its been a year and a half, and nothings changed.