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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

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How many of you would stand up for your chick?

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The Truth said:
It's called standing up for yourself, not letting people push you around and take advantage of you, and that DOES make me more of a man!
You seem to be obsessed with the idea of being a man. Not only that but you are throwing this around freely and bragging about it. Like "I'm mor of a MAN than YOU ARE"

If you really were, then you would be able to show us with your knowledge and wisdom, not by literally saying it.

You're just a little twerp.


Hipocrite.
 

PRMoon

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You should be a diplomat first. My father served two tours in Vietnam where he has literally killed several people. His point of advice when it comes to fighting is ONLY WHEN NECESSARY. If you can solve problems with words and brains first then you should try this by anymeans possible.

Having said that, this situation is definately not one that needed to be solved with fist. First your friend should have consoled his girlfriend but made it seem like it was more important then he did. Ask her if she's okay, have her explain the situation, reassured her that he was happy she wasn't hurt, then said that he'll talk to his co workers the next day when they wern't drunk. The following day he could take which ever culprit aside and say that manhandling his g/f was not cool and he should be careful not to do something like that in the future because it's disrespectful to her and by default to him. If his co workers do indeed respect him they'll apologize to him and everything will be cool again. If he's a chump then he's S.O.L. still but he dug that grave on his own.

The bottom line is that situation could be handled like a REAL man with words rather then a rash man and jumping resorting to violence when it wasn't necessary. Case closed
 

The Truth

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PRMoon said:
The bottom line is that situation could be handled like a REAL man with words rather then a rash man and jumping resorting to violence when it wasn't necessary. Case closed
i completely agree. There is no need for violence unless it's in self defence.

Confronting these guys is not about proving your manhood, its about letting them know their actions were out of line and that you wont allow them to walk over you or someone you care about.
 

The Truth

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brucevangeorge said:
You seem to be obsessed with the idea of being a man. Not only that but you are throwing this around freely and bragging about it. Like "I'm mor of a MAN than YOU ARE"

If you really were, then you would be able to show us with your knowledge and wisdom, not by literally saying it.

You're just a little twerp.


Hipocrite.
Hey kid, why are you throwing insults around? I notice you did this in another thread too. Don't you think that is childish?

If you have an opinion to argue then argue the opinion and I'll read what you have to say. There's no need to be throwing insults at people just because you disagree with them.

It's hard to take offence at someone insulting you over an internet forum but it just means I cant take you seriously.
 

izza

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Ultimately, after a certain age, we are all responsable for taking care of ourselves. It is nobody's job but ours. The problem is, we all secretly wish it were someone else's job - we secretly wish our parents could still take care of everything!

If you have a girlfriend, it is not your job to protect her. You can, and you might be a good person to do so, but it is not your job. But she has no right to lose respect for you... what is a bf, the police? A bodyguard? And I suppose you're paid in the money of sexual favors?

I know all of you fear that a woman will respect you less if you don't act tough, and don't protect her. So you disagree with what I'm saying, not because it's wrong, but because you believe women will not go for you if you don't protect her.

I agree this pact our caveman ancestors made with women, it might be practical and profitable. But profit has nothing to do with love or sacrifice. Protecting a woman for most of you becomes a paid service, a commercial agreement. This is very common amongst we humans today, don't get me wrong, and I've been there. I just think you can do better. Either protect a woman because it makes you happy to do it (keeping in mind that it's really her job), or don't do it.

This girl in the office was just angry that she was treated that way. But do you see how she secretly wished someone else would take care of the problem? Do you not see that she expected to be protected the second a man entered her life? And alone, what would she do... wither and die? I am far from a feminist, but does this girl have no independence, no spirit, no warrior left inside?

Izza
 

diplomatic_lies

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I dont know what the problem is. If a friend of yours gets bullied by some other guys, you help out, right? Whether your friend is male or female makes no difference.

If you're dating a girl, and some guys are groping her right in front of you, that's like some dude p!ssing on your car. What do you do to guys who p!ss on your car? Stand there and take it?
 

Jariel

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I'll share an experience here that I am very ashamed to admit...

When I was about 16 I went with my sister and a group of friends to a swimming pool. A group of guys started pushing my sister and her friends into the pool. They started pushing them back and it was all very playful until my sister pushed one of the guys and he slipped. I saw it first hand and it was an accident with no one to blame.

The guy then ended up shouting at my sister and she just apologised, stood there and took it. Then all of a sudden he slapped her across the face! She started crying and ran off.

Do you know what I did? I pretended not to notice. Sure I could try to excuse myself by claiming my sister should stand up for herself or that she provoked it or whatever, but the actual TRUTH was that I was a coward. I was scared to stand up for her in case the guys beat me up.

To this day I am ashamed of myself. I let a bully hurt my little sister and make her cry. Like all you guys say, she not my responsibility, I didn't have to get involved, but the guy was bigger, stronger and more aggressive than her and it's ridiculous to think she could have stood upto him.

If a girl is fighting with another girl or a guy who is weaker than herself, then yes, she can stand up for herself and should not expect me to get involved. If she causes the trouble and expects me to fight her battles, she can forget about it. But when it's a bigger guy or a group of guys preying on someone weaker and innocent, then I'd be ashamed to let it happen. I know how I felt when it happened to my sister and I felt like a coward and a pitiful excuse for a man.
 

Jariel

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Another thing I want to point out is that those of you who argue against standing up for women, must surely oppose the military, the police force and firefighters too.

Afterall, why should they put themselves in danger for someone else? Obviously not for the money, because there are safer, easier and better paid careers they could get.

Is every firefighter who rescues a woman from a burning building just another "captain save a ho"?
 

TheLazy

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agreed, at the end of the day, i'd rather be proud knowing i have a spine, dignity and a sense of justice, even if i am laying in hospital(which i wont because im so buff rofl), than to live like a spineless coward.
 
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TheLazy said:
agreed, at the end of the day, i'd rather be proud knowing i have a spine, dignity and a sense of justice, even if i am laying in hospital(which i wont because im so buff rofl), than to live like a spineless coward.
True. But you have to watch your own back also. You have to gauge the situation and figure out whether or not its worth it. Example: Would you risk your life to save a crack ho from getting abused by her pimp for not paying money on time?

Or Would you go out of your way to rescue some random chick that gets assaulted by some gangsters on the street? Unprokoved.


There's a difference and you have to see that.
 

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It's fraught with danger. Look at Tom Grant (R.I.P). Guy was abusing his g/f on a train, Tom stepped in and got stabbed.

Yeah, he had the right sense of right and wrong, but his death could have been avoided.

Would I do anything? Probably. It's just what I feel is right.
 
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The Truth said:
Hey kid, why are you throwing insults around? I notice you did this in another thread too. Don't you think that is childish?

If you have an opinion to argue then argue the opinion and I'll read what you have to say. There's no need to be throwing insults at people just because you disagree with them.

It's hard to take offence at someone insulting you over an internet forum but it just means I cant take you seriously.
I just find your arguments very irritating.
 
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WesCottII said:
It's fraught with danger. Look at Tom Grant (R.I.P). Guy was abusing his g/f on a train, Tom stepped in and got stabbed.

Yeah, he had the right sense of right and wrong, but his death could have been avoided.

Would I do anything? Probably. It's just what I feel is right.
Good point. In a case like that, you cannot just jump in. If the chick asks for help then he's fair game. But you do not jump into **** like that uninvited because its a relationship. And who knows? Maybe the chick's a psycho and when you attack her man she'll jump in and kick your ass too.
 
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diplomatic_lies said:
I dont know what the problem is. If a friend of yours gets bullied by some other guys, you help out, right? Whether your friend is male or female makes no difference.

If you're dating a girl, and some guys are groping her right in front of you, that's like some dude p!ssing on your car. What do you do to guys who p!ss on your car? Stand there and take it?
Depends on the car.

Is it a one-night rental?
 

diplomatic_lies

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Well even if it was a rental car, you still need to pay the rental company for cleaning up the pee stains.
 

manbearpig

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TheLazy said:
agreed, at the end of the day, i'd rather be proud knowing i have a spine, dignity and a sense of justice, even if i am laying in hospital(which i wont because im so buff rofl), than to live like a spineless coward.
I'm sorry, but I'm not going to endure an ass kicking. I've never been in a real fight in my life, and I don't plan to start.

If there is some way I can help the woman that doesn't involve violence I'm all open to that, but I just don't fight. Sorry.
 

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I've been going to clubs, parties, and the like all my life. I've never seen a group of dudes looking for trouble so bad that they just start groping a girl with her boyfriend right in front of her. Either the girl did something or there were other circumstances. I've had a guy walk by and slap my gf's ass and then run off. What can you honestly do? Go run him down and beat his ass? Whatever....

I've never been in a situation where I've had to fight because a girl I was with got groped. Contrary to popular belief, most guys take the hint, "Fukk off!!!" to heart and will leave a girl alone. The girl can take care of it in most instances.

If the OP's situation did happen, I would assess the situation and react. If fighting skills and physical strength defined the man, then no small or skinny guy would ever get laid...
 

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manbearpig said:
I'm sorry, but I'm not going to endure an ass kicking. I've never been in a real fight in my life, and I don't plan to start.

If there is some way I can help the woman that doesn't involve violence I'm all open to that, but I just don't fight. Sorry.
I agree in a sense. I fight when I have to. I really don't get disrespected that much. All the fights I've ever been in have never even involved a girl.
 

PRMoon

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diplomatic_lies said:
I dont know what the problem is. If a friend of yours gets bullied by some other guys, you help out, right? Whether your friend is male or female makes no difference.

If you're dating a girl, and some guys are groping her right in front of you, that's like some dude p!ssing on your car. What do you do to guys who p!ss on your car? Stand there and take it?
From the sounds of things, the events in question didn't happen in front of the subject in the discussion. Obviously if he were watching hs girlfriend get molested by drunken guys, then he be competely in the wrong not to step in. The same goes for your boy or your car or what have you. But since the situation was removed and he only has second hand knoledge of the events, and his girfriend wasn't physically harmed (maybe a little shocked) I don't see any reason to go into a crowd of guys who may or may not be guilty of the acts "guns a blazin". A typical man might do something like that but a great man uses his head first, thus assuring it stays on his shoulders longer.

Discression is the better part of valor.
 

Jariel

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I definitely agree with using your head first and whenever I've been in situations like this, I've always been civil, and yet stood my ground.

On one occasion, my friend was grabbed by this big guy as she tried to leave a bar. He was there with a gang of rough looking guys, she was terrified and I was scared to intervene. But I went over to them and without being confrontational, just said "she's with me, we're just leaving". The guys all backed down, apologised to us and even shook my hand. They showed me respect, because even though I was outnumbered, I stood my ground and they knew I was not going to be a pushover.

On the other hand, another friend was slapped on the ass by a guy in a gang of your typical aggressive gangsta types. We were in a bad part of town and I did not fancy my chances so I left it and suggested we get out of there. She was p1ssed at them, but she agreed we did the wisest thing.

In the case of the original poster, these guys were just guys from the office. My guess is that they only did this because they knew guy was a pushover, and if he'd stood upto them (now, if not before hand) they would have shown him respect and not taken it any further.

Regardless of strength, size or numbers, guys who don't stand up for themselves make the easiest victims.
 
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