If there is one thing I have never been good at, it's getting hooked up through friends. I'm always told it's this marvelous strategy and even the most dreadful AFCs seem to herald it with praise. But yet whenever I've tried I always receive the canned response "I don't know anybody," which may individually be true but, c'mon, there must be someone who knows someone. The best I ever heard was "All my friends are either taken or they don't date." They don't go out on dates? Bullsh*t!
It always perplexed me as to why. Maybe they really didn't know anyone. Maybe they didn't know me well enough. Guy friends are horrible sources of hook-ups because if they are single they won't give up any quality ass and if they have a girlfriend they probably don't know any ladies outside of their girlfriend's or wife's social circle. Receiving a glowing recommendation from a girl is extremely potent social proof, leading me to think my struggle has been I just hadn't won over their opinions. However, it occurred to me a few short months ago that I usually am friends with women who aren't attracted to me. This made me wonder the role sexual attraction plays in the selector. Obviously, sexual attraction matters to the two parties being hooked-up, but what about to the woman who's throwing her friends into the fire? Obviously, then, sexual attraction must be the difference between her telling her friends "Well, um, he's a really nice guy" and "OMG! He's really funny, really cute, and really nice!"
I have a roommate whose girlfriend seems to like me, maybe a little more than him. I keep my respectful distance. Two weeks ago there was a house party and I briefly noticed one of her friends is right up my very narrow alley. I didn't have a chance to talk but I asked through the grapevine for a hook-up. I was very skeptical but surprisingly enough two days later I receive a playful note from her with her phone number. I've called her twice, volleyed around some text messages, and things are going surprisingly well. (She's 21 yrs old and the shaming has already begun. ) My point is whatever the roommate's girlfriend said of me, it must have been golden.
I'd be interested in hearing your opinions of perhaps why, other than now, I could never get friendly assistance.
It always perplexed me as to why. Maybe they really didn't know anyone. Maybe they didn't know me well enough. Guy friends are horrible sources of hook-ups because if they are single they won't give up any quality ass and if they have a girlfriend they probably don't know any ladies outside of their girlfriend's or wife's social circle. Receiving a glowing recommendation from a girl is extremely potent social proof, leading me to think my struggle has been I just hadn't won over their opinions. However, it occurred to me a few short months ago that I usually am friends with women who aren't attracted to me. This made me wonder the role sexual attraction plays in the selector. Obviously, sexual attraction matters to the two parties being hooked-up, but what about to the woman who's throwing her friends into the fire? Obviously, then, sexual attraction must be the difference between her telling her friends "Well, um, he's a really nice guy" and "OMG! He's really funny, really cute, and really nice!"
I have a roommate whose girlfriend seems to like me, maybe a little more than him. I keep my respectful distance. Two weeks ago there was a house party and I briefly noticed one of her friends is right up my very narrow alley. I didn't have a chance to talk but I asked through the grapevine for a hook-up. I was very skeptical but surprisingly enough two days later I receive a playful note from her with her phone number. I've called her twice, volleyed around some text messages, and things are going surprisingly well. (She's 21 yrs old and the shaming has already begun. ) My point is whatever the roommate's girlfriend said of me, it must have been golden.
I'd be interested in hearing your opinions of perhaps why, other than now, I could never get friendly assistance.