Her leaving for 2-3 months

[jaybeezi]

I've been seeing my GF for about 3 months (we've known eachother over a year) and the other day we had this conversation

GF: My sister asked me to come visit her in NY but I don't really like it there.
JB: Are you going to go?
GF: I don't know, I haven't decided.
JB: You should go, how long would you be gone for? 1 week, 2 weeks?
GF: A couple of months, 2-3, but maybe longer
JB: Ok you shouldn't go lol

We talked about it more 2 days later and she said she was going. It was obvious I didn't want her to go, not for that long anyway. And she said that if I didn't want her to go she wouldn't...

She hasn't seen most of them in years, and she's only been there once about 6 years ago. She acts like 3 months isn't a long time for her to be gone but it's about how long we've been together, just seems like a long break this early in a relationship, and I don't want anything to happen cause things are going really well.

I don't want her to go for 3 months... but I really don't want to be the guy that holds her back from doing the things she wants to do. I feel like saying "don't go" will stay around for awhile, and probably not be a good thing for us.

But she's got 6 months left of school that she's going to postpone to go... Which I don't think is a good idea, especially considering she REALLY wants to move A.S.A.P. and this would just delay it. We're in a LDR already and only see eachother on the weekends, this summer we were supposed to spend more time together.... I don't know.

 

[Macgyver]

You should break up with her soon then, in my experience when a girl plans to go on a long vacation or talks about being busy with school in the future is they are getting ready to dump your ass. Either way, 3 months is indeed a long time - just break up now then and then if she comes back and decides to hook up with you still being single then go for it. Reality speaking both of you haven't dated long enough to reach that serious point yet.

 

[Hurrican]

A few weeks OK. But 2-3 fukin months...HELL NO. She will loose attraction for you. It fukin Happened to me when my gf went to russia for 2 months. search threads I started and read.

 

[jaybeezi]

You should break up with her soon then, in my experience when a girl plans to go on a long vacation or talks about being busy with school in the future is they are getting ready to dump your ass. Either way, 3 months is indeed a long time - just break up now then and then if she comes back and decides to hook up with you still being single then go for it. Reality speaking both of you haven't dated long enough to reach that serious point yet.

I don't see that happening right now, she JUST (the day she told me) bought a couple of pillows, some towels, bathing supplies, etc... to use when she is here (to leave here) and bought me some cologne. That's not the only reason, things are going well. What I am worried about is

This

A few weeks OK. But 2-3 fukin months...HELL NO. She will loose attraction for you. It fukin Happened to me when my gf went to russia for 2 months. search threads I started and read.

This is what I'm worried about, just thinkin it'll be tough on a 3 (will be about 5 month by the time she goes) relationship

 

[Cruise]

Yup. I lost attraction for my ex after 2 weeks of not seeing her. And she just lives 10 miles away. ha ha. fart.

 

[jaybeezi]

Yup. I lost attraction for my ex after 2 weeks of not seeing her. And she just lives 10 miles away. ha ha. fart.

That sucks.

We've been apart for 1, 2, almost 3 weeks sometimes and when we're all over eachother when we finally see eachother again.

But that's when she's at home, at school, doing the same thing every day. When she's on the other side of the country doing something new every day it will be easier for her to get along without me.

She likes going to clubs, and she said she didn't like it last time she went to NY because she wasn't old enough to do anything (clubs) but this time she may like it more (she's 24 now).

 

[Cruise]

Ha. She'll definitely like it more.

j/p

Don't want to burst your bubble, really at this point you couldn't definitely conclude that if she leaves for 2-3 months, that the relationship would end.

If you really feel you're connecting with her, and you want to keep this relationship going, figure out a way to keep in contact. Here's a hint though: If she slowly stops expressing that she misses being with you, then chances are, she's finding her trip more attractive.

Let her know how much you've been up to while she's been away; keep busy, do something productive that you haven't had the chance to do while she was with you. It shows that you weren't a hermit that had a girlfriend as an excuse to why you aren't doing anything else.

 

[Hurrican]

my russian girl likes clubs also. Did u read my thread?

I was afrid of her not likeing me also before she left and that is exactly what happened.


But NY. wtf that is like a $300 plane ticket. She can't visit for a few weeks at the most?


If she goes......she is gone.


I had a 4 month relationship before she left.

 

[Weak_Game]

Was in a LTR with a girl. She had a pre planned trip to France for 2-3 months for a college trip. Our relationship was amazing well up till before she left. I knew 3 months apart and her partying it up in France would be the demise and end of us.


Guess what? It was.

Break up with her now. Shes going to meet new boys in nyc. You will be a mere after thought. Anything more then a few weeks. And if you arent married or been with the girl for several years. Attraction fades. Out of sight, out of mind. sh_it happens. Like some di-ck falling into her vagina.

 

[Hurrican]

Was in a LTR with a girl. She had a pre planned trip to France for 2-3 months for a college trip. Our relationship was amazing well up till before she left. I knew 3 months apart and her partying it up in France would be the demise and end of us.


Guess what? It was.

Break up with her now. Shes going to meet new boys in nyc. You will be a mere after thought. Anything more then a few weeks. And if you arent married or been with the girl for several years. Attraction fades. Out of sight, out of mind. sh_it happens. Like some di-ck falling into her vagina.

damn bro you too. It sucks....how did you feel about her while she was gone? DId you cheat? How did you feel when she came back all quite and ****?

 

[MacAvoy]

Spin more plates

You'll become more valuable to her if your the prize. Start to see other women, use this as your advantage. Just don't tell her, she'll notice the difference in you once you see other women. She'll be impressed.

 

[Weak_Game]

damn bro you too. It sucks....how did you feel about her while she was gone? DId you cheat? How did you feel when she came back all quite and ****?

It hurt, but time heals. If she never went we would probably still be together. 3 months without a girlfriend whos out of town will destroy the relationship. We even called each other for a half hour twice a week. Sent post cards. They slowly started to fade as the months went on. She was just having too much fun over there. We broke up before she even got back. When she got back we talked a little, but never got back together. The trip really killed the spark. I was faithful just in my nature. But as i saw the decline of the relationship before my eyes. The inevitablity of her slipping from my hands. I started to explore my options.

So again to the original poster, break up now. Move on. Maby when she gets back or a few months after that she will get in contact with you. In fact break up with her wish her well and cut off all contact. Period till a month or 2 after shes back. Then she should chase you, thats if a penis or two didnt fall into her while on the trip. It happens.