After five years ,Things had been not good for a while had been long distance for three years. recentley my girlfriend said she wanted to split up wanted to move on etc im not sure if there is another guy she denies this obviousley. i was pretty selfish for last year, i can admit this and see i killed her love for me i put no effort in the relationship at all. I called her last week to say i wanted it to work in which she was polite but basically said she sees no future and is ready to move on and that she will call me three days later because she had gone to a different city to see her friend.she did call exactley when she said not a minute before and said again she does not want to get back so i said fair enough goodbye . She calls me next night to see how i am i answer and acted fine and not needy she was asking me questions about some girls iv added on the internet in which i said i had to go. I deleted her number. I have not called her for three days decided on no contact. well today she calls me seven times i dont answer then she texts me she had a bad dream and wants to know if im ok and that im obviousley ignoring her. im so confused right now dont know what to do for best should i reply? ignore . im not ready to be friends but at same time i would like to get back even tho i know i could not get over this. she is a very pretty girl and has been going out a lot recentley and hanging with other guys any more i dont know but im not stupid.
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Girlfriend broke up with me.
- Thread starter exscall
- Start date
Julius_Seizeher
Master Don Juan
*new recruit gets off the bus, heartbroken and confused
DonS: "You god damn disgusting AFC heathen, why are you polluting my beloved forum with your emasculated presence!?!?! What the fvck makes you think you can hack it?!?!?"
Jophil28: "...in this day and age, a man will forget his truest identity and create a media caricature that he thinks will please the females, only to be left penniless and profoundly confused when his princess rides off on a kangaroo..."
Rollo Tomassi: "In essence, this situation is a direct result of the feminized social conventions failure to comply with the 48 Laws of Power. Men, whose minds are wired for logic and reason, admittedly are slow to accept that there is no 'principle of indemnity' at play in relationships, nor in life itself. It is the perpetuation of these pro-feminist ideals that are the bane of man's existence today.
Scaramouche: "Aye, a tomb now suffices him for whom the whole world was not enough...when I was a pup there was this old bag of bones who sat downtown with a bottle...he helped build the pyramids and his feet were very sore...he would say "'Tis the pain of death I suffer now, to have so avoided it in my youth"...
AlphaRomeo: "Run up to a GIRL and SAY HEY do you like CHOCOLATE?
www.spasticguy.com
*I'm not hating on you guys, cept maybe AlphaRomeo, hell he's ok he just posts a bunch of weird sh!t...
TO THE OP
You remind me much of myself, when I found this site a year ago. I had just gotten out of a 5 year LTR and was somewhat confused and hurt, with some AFC tendencies to get rid of. First things first, do not contact your ex AT ALL. You have a ton of work to do! You have to read the DJ Bible, the Archives, everything on this site, then you have to engage in dialogue with the guys here to aid your mental journey.
Once again, you have a ton of work to do. I see an AFC mind conditioned by society behind your post. Get to work!
DonS: "You god damn disgusting AFC heathen, why are you polluting my beloved forum with your emasculated presence!?!?! What the fvck makes you think you can hack it?!?!?"
Jophil28: "...in this day and age, a man will forget his truest identity and create a media caricature that he thinks will please the females, only to be left penniless and profoundly confused when his princess rides off on a kangaroo..."
Rollo Tomassi: "In essence, this situation is a direct result of the feminized social conventions failure to comply with the 48 Laws of Power. Men, whose minds are wired for logic and reason, admittedly are slow to accept that there is no 'principle of indemnity' at play in relationships, nor in life itself. It is the perpetuation of these pro-feminist ideals that are the bane of man's existence today.
Scaramouche: "Aye, a tomb now suffices him for whom the whole world was not enough...when I was a pup there was this old bag of bones who sat downtown with a bottle...he helped build the pyramids and his feet were very sore...he would say "'Tis the pain of death I suffer now, to have so avoided it in my youth"...
AlphaRomeo: "Run up to a GIRL and SAY HEY do you like CHOCOLATE?
www.spasticguy.com
*I'm not hating on you guys, cept maybe AlphaRomeo, hell he's ok he just posts a bunch of weird sh!t...
TO THE OP
You remind me much of myself, when I found this site a year ago. I had just gotten out of a 5 year LTR and was somewhat confused and hurt, with some AFC tendencies to get rid of. First things first, do not contact your ex AT ALL. You have a ton of work to do! You have to read the DJ Bible, the Archives, everything on this site, then you have to engage in dialogue with the guys here to aid your mental journey.
Once again, you have a ton of work to do. I see an AFC mind conditioned by society behind your post. Get to work!
jophil28
Master Don Juan
She has told you several times that she wants to finish the relationship. THat is enough to remove her from your life permanently.exscall said:
She is contacting you to mitigate her guilt, OR to line you up to sign an "Orbiter Agreement" in which she extracts the benefits of casually seeing you, when it suits her.
Either way, her motivation in continuing to call you is entirely selfish, even though she would claim differently. Take that to the bank.
There is NO benefit to you in replying - is there ? So don't do it.
PlaysToWin
Don Juan
What jophil said. She probably thinks, in her mind, that she is doing you a favour by keeping in touch and checking up on you. But in reality, she want's to alleviate her own guilt and asking about those girls you added was just plain nosy. Cut her off. Permanently. No friendship. No more contact for any reason whatsoever. Do not call her. Do not answer her calls. Delete her texts without replying to them. In fact don't even read them. Don't look her up on facebook or whatever. Don't ask friends about her. NO CONTACT.
sodbuster
Master Don Juan
It makes her crazy that you didnt BEG her to stay. Now she's not so sure about the break[either that or your replacement didn't work out]. ANother possibility is she wanted to get you to beg to marry her and thought this will do it[Go ahead and pop the question-IF you want to be her B!TCH for the rest of your life. She'll OWN your ba11s]
Like the other posters already said. NO CONTACT. IF she wants to get back together,date other women at the same time. Since it was her idea to break up now she has to EARN the right to date you again.
Like the other posters already said. NO CONTACT. IF she wants to get back together,date other women at the same time. Since it was her idea to break up now she has to EARN the right to date you again.
Well i sent a text back saying im fine like a fool did not wait for replys of you guys i know very stupid, listened to that little voice in my head. she rang me straight away i answered again i know silly, I played it cool she asked me if we could still meet up in future to watch football i said no, we support the same team, then i made excuses and hung up.
My emotions got best of me and i called her back, we talked for ages to cut a long story she still wants to be friends says she still cares and loves me but does not see a future.at one point she said she wanted sex with me and that people would say she was such a ***** for saying this but she cant help it and wanted phone sex During the convo she also said she would like to see me next week for sex. i did not control my emotions and said i think it could work between us etc then i said thers no chance of us been friends. she said she feels guilty for leading me on etc at end of convo.
Then i sent a message telling her not to feel guilty im in control of myself and that i know us splitting up is for best and deep down i dont want to get back and to ignore what i said speak soon she replyed thanks for nice text etc i know i sound like the biggest AFC .
The reason i take a lot of blame is for last year she has bailed me out many time financially i made no effort and i cheated on her regulary which im not proud of she never found out. except when i tryed to break up with her once and told her i kissed another girl very very stupid it hit her hard which i am not proud of there was many signs that i chose to ignore that she was not happy and i was generally the worst boyfriend possible , i know there is only so much anybody can take i killed the love, i also realise she was not perfect at all and played a part.
I feel like iv been somebody im not for a long long time, very unhappy in myself lost my drive life going no where and was very negative i feel like a different person like the real me is back not because of her just that this made me take a good long look at myself. I feel this has given me a massive wake up call im 26 and need to get my life in order and make it as great as it should be in which nothing will stop me.
I dont know why iv acted like this i have no problem getting the ladys without sounding big headed im a good lucking guy in great shape not scared of rejection and feel confident just dont seem to see any that are as nice as my ex, i feel like i wont make these relationship mistakes again in the future wont cheat etc. its been two weeks since we split writing this and reading your advice helps a lot .
I will not get in contact at all from now on and will ignore calls texts have deleted her facebook.really appreciate you guys giving me advice it is spot on will make sure i take it, sorry for rambling thanks guys
My emotions got best of me and i called her back, we talked for ages to cut a long story she still wants to be friends says she still cares and loves me but does not see a future.at one point she said she wanted sex with me and that people would say she was such a ***** for saying this but she cant help it and wanted phone sex During the convo she also said she would like to see me next week for sex. i did not control my emotions and said i think it could work between us etc then i said thers no chance of us been friends. she said she feels guilty for leading me on etc at end of convo.
Then i sent a message telling her not to feel guilty im in control of myself and that i know us splitting up is for best and deep down i dont want to get back and to ignore what i said speak soon she replyed thanks for nice text etc i know i sound like the biggest AFC .
The reason i take a lot of blame is for last year she has bailed me out many time financially i made no effort and i cheated on her regulary which im not proud of she never found out. except when i tryed to break up with her once and told her i kissed another girl very very stupid it hit her hard which i am not proud of there was many signs that i chose to ignore that she was not happy and i was generally the worst boyfriend possible , i know there is only so much anybody can take i killed the love, i also realise she was not perfect at all and played a part.
I feel like iv been somebody im not for a long long time, very unhappy in myself lost my drive life going no where and was very negative i feel like a different person like the real me is back not because of her just that this made me take a good long look at myself. I feel this has given me a massive wake up call im 26 and need to get my life in order and make it as great as it should be in which nothing will stop me.
I dont know why iv acted like this i have no problem getting the ladys without sounding big headed im a good lucking guy in great shape not scared of rejection and feel confident just dont seem to see any that are as nice as my ex, i feel like i wont make these relationship mistakes again in the future wont cheat etc. its been two weeks since we split writing this and reading your advice helps a lot .
I will not get in contact at all from now on and will ignore calls texts have deleted her facebook.really appreciate you guys giving me advice it is spot on will make sure i take it, sorry for rambling thanks guys
realsmoothie
Master Don Juan
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LO frickin LJulius_Seizeher said:
BlackJackal
Master Don Juan
Dont fvck around and call that girl. No contact man. She dont care about you. 5 yrs dont mean nothin. It's all about today. She wants out, let her go. Learn your lessons and move on.exscall said:
BlackJackal
Master Don Juan
Damn...never mind.exscall said:
Don't beat yourself up too much...I got out of a relationship a few months back and I knew better than to beg and plead, yet I still did it because I allowed my emotions to control me.
Just chalk it up as a lesson learned and try not to repeat it in the future.
Just chalk it up as a lesson learned and try not to repeat it in the future.
bish0p said:
yeah i will learn for def, i knew not to do what i did myself, did not think a split would hit me like it did . iv pulled myself togeother she has been trying to get in touch with me but iv learned there can be only one way no contact and move on. maybe when im over this totally and moved on, We could one day be friends when im ready tho.
Dude I've seen a lot of these threads and watched a lot of dudes get dumped by their girls and I have to say that even though you did f*ck up a few times, they weren't that bad, and that you've probably dealt with this the best out of every case I've seen. Congrats! Keep it up!
i could do some with some more advice guys again, after last convo last night i sent a message saying how some of things that have happened were not acceptable and basically that thats it for me after this i made decision to not put myself thru this. anyway first thing in morning get a text explaining herself. basically she started ringing me and has basically rang me all day and night sent texts pleading with me to call her, if you have read my last post you will know were i am now. i do feel sorry for her its like she is going mad, i dont get pleasure out of her ringing me like this but at same time after last night everything was made clear to me. we did go out for 5 years and she is a good person. she is texting me why wont you answer your phone i just wanna talk for a minute etc and has started non stop ringing advice would be appreciated.
"When was the last time a guy on this site broke up with a girl?! Damn, we're getting dumped all over the place"
this is a biased statement
the guys that break up with their girls are in control, and they are a bit busy spinning other plates and getting their lives fixed, they don't post to this forum hoping to create a solution to their desperate situation...
they end the problem and move on to create new oportunities....
the guys that post about their relationships problems most of the times get a deserved answer:
DUMP HER, NEXT HER, move on....... they are confused, they can't control the relationship.... they keep posting, and not following advice... so they come back asking us for advice on how to do NO CONTACT because they have just been DUMPED!!!!
this is a biased statement
the guys that break up with their girls are in control, and they are a bit busy spinning other plates and getting their lives fixed, they don't post to this forum hoping to create a solution to their desperate situation...
they end the problem and move on to create new oportunities....
the guys that post about their relationships problems most of the times get a deserved answer:
DUMP HER, NEXT HER, move on....... they are confused, they can't control the relationship.... they keep posting, and not following advice... so they come back asking us for advice on how to do NO CONTACT because they have just been DUMPED!!!!
pipe007 said:"When was the last time a guy on this site broke up with a girl?! Damn, we're getting dumped all over the place"
this is a biased statement
the guys that break up with their girls are in control, and they are a bit busy spinning other plates and getting their lives fixed, they don't post to this forum hoping to create a solution to their desperate situation...
they end the problem and move on to create new oportunities....
the guys that post about their relationships problems most of the times get a deserved answer:
DUMP HER, NEXT HER, move on....... they are confused, they can't control the relationship.... they keep posting, and not following advice... so they come back asking us for advice on how to do NO CONTACT because they have just been DUMPED!!!!
well i have followed the advice i have been given, i made the choice to move on in my head im not contacting her she is contacting me. and i am getting on with my life. iv read a lot of posts on this site were guys are really, struggling to get women, and finding it hard to keep interest short term, i do not have this problem at all,and can understand these peeps asking for advice. so i am going to ask for advice on my situation and listen to peoples opinions not because im sad or desperate or an afc and of course im going to be a bit confused it was not a two week fling or a ons.
