Contending life: The Struggles of One Man overcoming Extreme Hardship.

[Contender]

Table of Contents

-Introduction
-Contender's Flaws; and a list of Grievances
-Contender's Solution to each, and every problem
-Conclusion
-Credits​

Author's Preface: I am going to be completely straightforward with you.
Why?

So I can help myself by letting it all out, and clearly thinking through a successful plan with the help of fellow members. I would love to hear your helpful suggestions. Furthermore, hopefully through my thread, I will inspire others to push for a change; it’s not easy; it’s an epic battle.

Please assist me through this major transition in any way possible.

Read on.

INTRODUCTION

I am an insecure kid. I am a pushover. I am easily offended. Peers tease me.

They call me "Ribba" (fish in Russian) for my agile speed in the water.

At first I believed it was a compliment.
You know, Fish are very fast in the water; yes, they have a smell, but I thought nothing of it. But, I was delusional; I wasn’t that good to be given such a flattering title.

That revelation didn’t just hit me like that; I overheard it. Then it hit me like a ton of brinks. I suck.
My ego was my downfall, like Napoleon’s downfall.

I love to be complimented. I thrived off of it like a parasite. I tend to block out the negative undertones of anyone’s comments at me when receiving a complement – a form of denial, I suppose.

I recently befriended a girl in one of my classes. I discovered how charming I could really be; and funny, too. She replied, while giggling, “Wow, “Contender”, you’re so funny… I’m glad I got to know you. Everyone was wrong about you.” It was something to that effect. Basically, everyone was talking s’hit about me, behind my back. This girl, after getting to know me, realized it was all false. I didn’t bother asking her what they said; however I’m very curious now. I think I’ll ask when she signs online tomorrow; but it’s going to be very negative.

I’ve been pushed around in High School; befriended by others with agendas to do well on exams, to get to know my “friends” and the like.

Like, today was my High School Prom and no one told me about the After-Party. I didn't know where it was, and how to get there. My friends KNEW, and didn't tell me...

I’ve accepted the fact that I have flaws. I’ve acknowledged that I am in need of some serious work!

My Flaws

I am infested with problems.

- I do not take care of my body.
- I do not eat “right.”
- I do not take care of my appearance; I let myself be “ugly.”
- I’m a pushover.
- I’m shy.
- I am gullible.
- I am lazy.
- I am not in shape (or at least, I’m not lean and muscular enough to my liking)
- Did I mention I’m lazy? I through my entire High School career down the drain. I had no social life; and my academic achievements suck with only one exception – with my leadership, I carried my school to win its very first Mock Trial competition, ever. I was the Captain; but believe, me I had “bad” moments. I held back. I was timid. I did EVERYTHING WRONG!
- You name it and it’s most likely my flaw.... need I continue?

I'm a complete "AFC" and worse.

I'm a Contender!

I am not going to let them win. I am not going to LET anyone win. I'm not taking "NO" for an answer anymore.

I will FIND a way to solve MY problems. No more excuses; I am the PROBLEM, but not for long!!!

PLEASE RECOMMEND ME USEFUL PRODUCTS!!!!!PLEASE RECOMMEND ME USEFUL PRODUCTS!!!!!PLEASE RECOMMEND ME USEFUL PRODUCTS!!!!!

1) The Hygiene Problem

I WILL TAKE CARE OF MY PERSONAL HYGIENE.

Let's start with my body, holistically...

I will Eat healthy meals; "clean, and lean" food like chicken without the fatty skin, rice, veggies, and so on. I will not consume JUNK FOOD anymore! Today was my last day for that crap.

"You are what you eat." I am not Junk - not anymore.

No more soda, and ****; only water, and SKIM milk (after I finish my last gallon of 1% milk).

I will buy healthy supplements. I will buy Fish Oil, Multivitamins, Whey Protein, Green Tea extracts... what else do I need (I will be working out)?

I will maintain a strong body! A strong mind is nothing without a strong body! I will exersise regularly (three days per week until college, when it will be four to five days per week). I will swim five to six days a week. I will earn myself the right to be called a SHARK... not a fish!

I will become so FAST, and burn so much fat!

I will eat right and eat regularly. I will workout. I will swim. I will participate in physical activities - it's fun, and it's a great way to get in shape!

Now, the nitty gritty details of hygiene.

I just spoke to my mother and I am going to visit my dentist this weekend and get my teeth cleaned. He will remove all the crap in my teeth -- the plaque and ****.

At the Dentist's I will purchase whiting strips for my teeth! Once I finish them, I'll buy more when needed.

I vow to take excellent care of my teeth from now on. I will floss, and brush, after each meal, respectviely; in addition, I will use Listeraine to liquidate the harmful bacteria.

I will shower regularly - twice a day; once in the morning, and once before calling it a night. I will clean myself thouroughly, and shave when needed.

I will buy effective, and good smelling soap and body wash. I will buy effective, and good smelling shampoo and conditioner for my hair.

I will clip my nails when needed, and clean my ears.

I don't like too much bodily hair. How can I control it? I hate chest hair, and ****... how can I maintain a hairless body? I want to be a swimmer, so I need to be hairless.

2) I'm weak willed

I'm going to maintain the nice personaility I had. I won't let myself degrade into an ******* due to my bitter experiences. I am better than that.

I will learn from it. What doesn't kill me, WILL make me stronger! I will approach everything with guarded cautious. I will take everything with a grain of salt.

Everyone lies to advance their personal agendas. I will not BELIEVE ANYTHING unless I see it with my OWN eyes. I will not believe anything until I do my OWN invesitagation/research.

I will be independent. I won't take people's word as the ultimate truth. It's my life; it's my little world. I rule it. I will be self-sufficent, and check things out for myself!

I will not be a fool. I will not be gullible. I will not be a pushover. I am NOT a fool. I am NOT GULLIBlE. I AM NOT A PUSHOVER.

If I want to do something, I will let it be known. I will not be a "yes" boy. I will think for myself, and act on my own accord.

3) everything else...

You can insult me, degrade me, do whatever you want, but I shall hold my ground and my honor. I shall hold my head up high and if you cross my path, I will go RIGHT through YOU!

I am tough. I can do whatever I set my mind on. I USED to be lazy, but not anymore.

I will challenege myself mentallity and physically. I will read books daily. I will study. I will do well in college. I will transfer to an Ivy League. I will reieve my SAT score in a few weeks - I've studied my ass off for it; hopefully it paid off. If I did really well, than Ivy League is within reach.

I will be successful. I will not revolve my world around girls. My world revolves around me and my needs. I will meet those needs.

I will not be a selfish pr'ick.

I will get out of my financially crippling situation! I will be free from the pressure to bring a check to the table to help my family. I will be so rich, that my family will well off without a worry.

I will help poor nations like Bill Gates. I will Change the world for good... maybe run for President and help improve our economy, international relations, domestic policies, etc.

I will give back to the needy, and help the general public through my prospective company. I will be an ideal corporate citizien. I will be a good guy.

I will be a man. A charming, good smelling man who dresses well. I will be HONEST, straightfoward, sweet, funny, playful, flirtatous, etc.

I will be ME! I will unleash this man within me that has been bottled up for years, and years.

P.S. What products do you recommend for me? What cologne, deoterant?

As a matter of fact... what stores do you recommend I look into as well?

 

[Contender]

This goes into effect on June 10, 2006 at 9:00 AM (around the time I wake up).

I will update this thread with the immediate progress. I am going to Costco to buy some good foods, to the dentist to clean myself up, and to the gym for my first real day!

I've been familiarizing myself with the equipment... not it's time to "hit the gym."

I'll post later tomorrow in regards to my progress in this thread, so stay tuned! I'll need some help to getting all of this done.

Motivation, advice, etc

 

[crumpiteer]

while the intent & resolve of your manifesto & action plan is good, i think you are trying to achieve too many things and fixing more than one can handle..

a goal should be SMART, that is:

Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic & Time

so, better concentrate on just one or two goals at a time that's the priority.

 

[Contender]

I can do it.

 

[Dogfish]

that's great dude!
good luck with that, it's gonna be awesome.

not an insult: if you're intelligent (reading!) you are not gullible anymore because you are smarter and know it better.

just a hint

 

[adit]

I think it's really good you want to change.

I think the hygiene part is basic stuff,you really should clip your nails when they're long and stuff.

The idea to start working out is a good one.I started last year and it changed my whole personality.I became more confident,I became more of an extrovert than an introvert,I learnt to stand up for myself,I learnt that I didn't need any 'gang' of friends to enjoy.I became amiable with everyone I knew.Yes,I did get into fights a few times,but a lot of it was related to me boxing against some other kid and his friends didn't like it.

Now those are only a few of the things I gained from working out,there are a ton more.Just make sure you remain motivated;measure your biceps and chest and waist once a month and see them growing,arm-wrestle once in a while at random with anyone,take up boxing etc.

A lot of your 'hardship' had to do with lack of confidence because people would talk behind your back and stuff.Get that self-confidence and see yourself bloom.

 

[Contender]

Status Report

I just came back from the dentist and Costco. My teeth are cleeeean! :woo:

They look great, and I got retainters to keep 'em straight. I only have to wear it at night!!

I bought teeth whiting, too. I'm going to start to use them at night - that's when I'll apply it.

I bought a lot of sh't at Costco - all the good stuff. No more junk! (I just ate chicken and rice... now I'm sitting here, snacking on blueberries!)

I FEELLLL GOOD already.

I'm going out to play Football ("Soccer") and then I'm going to hit the gym with my new routine.

I bought some new clothes... I've received like 5 compliments on it already! :yes:

I'll buy more when I get the $$$.

I'll going to take my motorcycle permit test!

Also, I bought hair gel and wax.

That's all for now... To be continued! I'll get there ASAP

 

[Fitch]

Keep us posted! Glad I could help out.

As for the products... I'm not exactly sure what the best stuff is... hopefully others can answer your question.

 

[Contender]

Keep us posted! Glad I could help out.

As for the products... I'm not exactly sure what the best stuff is... hopefully others can answer your question.

Thanks.

By the way, I've decided for my birthday present that I want cash, for clothes. I'm going to go on shopping spree and get all of the stuff that I want; and save some of the "dough" for my bike.

I'm going to get fitted jeans, and tight tees; tight classic shirts (button downs), nice belt, and shoes.... :-D

And some "beach-style" clothing!

 

[True Wolf]

Best of luck man. THIS is what people ought to be doing. Instead of *****ing like a little c*nt about your problems you are going out of your way to FIX them and you're tough and determined enough that you don't need our help to do it. Although we are here to help you outa jams if need be. Stick with it man, it's all worth it in the end.

 

[supajsilver2]

The simple fact that you've taken the time to go over your flaws and take steps to correct them, come onto this site and show so much confidence gives you more of an advantage over those fvckers at your school than you could imagine. Good luck dog.

_J_

 

[Potbelly]

Contender dude you are the man. You just reminded me I haven't gotten a bday gift yet!! time to get it

 

[cubed]

Good luck Contender! Just by doing something you're automatically leagues ahead of pretty much everybody on this board!

The most important thing is to not give up when things start getting difficult. I don't want to sound pessimist, but there will be times later on when you feel overwhelmed and feel like quitting. At those times, I want you to remember how far you've gotten and how better things will be if you keep on trying. Never give up!

Please keep everyone here posted!

 

[Contender]

Thanks for the support, guys. When the going gets tough, you'll be there to push me along, right?

Status Report

Okay, well today has been one of the best days in my life. I felt like a ship heading toward an iceburg. Now, I feel like a shipping steering clear of the iceberg.

I feel fuc'king great.

I successfully completed my first workout! I drank my shakes, and ate the right food! I had chicken, salad, fruits, sushi, etc. I at well! Usually, I skip meals because I was too lazy and such. I never did ANYTHING productive... until NOW... until TODAY. And, it started today, and this positive progression will continue through the rest of my life!

I shaved. My teeth are clean and white - wow, they are actually white! I flossed today, and brushed thoroughly. I'm clean!!! I smell great - i got some good colonge (polo blue) and some nice clothes.

I tried approaching today, even. I approached two girls at the same time, and it went well - somewhat. They were smiling and very "into it" you know... but I felt a little intimidated and I just said I had to go.

I went to a relative's party today at a resturant. This resturant is huge; it hosted more than one party.

I saw this really beautiful girl. She had a face of a top-notch model. She had a great body, and a beautiful complexion. I've never felt so horny before!:cheer:

She gave me this short glance, and continued to walk away. A little bit of "old" self creeped in, and I failed to say "Hi" or anything. She went into this gaming room... I'm sure I could have done something, but I was too f'ucking scared.

Now, I really, really regret it.


You know.. CLOTHES really do change a person. I feel like a new person! I feel soooo goood.

I still have a lot to complete on this list, but I shall get it all done before the summer ends. I'll have all my supplies to ensure that I remain in good physical and mental health.

I read today. I exercised my mind.

But, I'm still bummed out about that girl. I geled my hair for the first time in like... idk. And, damn, I look fine! I made it into a messy look. It looked nice.

I went out with some "friends." I handled them well. They noticed a change.

I drove my car; they drove their car and we playfully raced down the street.

We ate some Sushi, and I shared my experiences - they laughed, but they DON'T have the BALLS to ask a girl. They never have. I did. In a matter of days, I became a better man then they were.

I benched a lot of weight. I lifted a lot. I feel accomplished. today was a great day.

My thoughts are all over the place. I'm writing to you in a state of europhia.

<3<3<3<3<3<3


EDIT: I did have my bad moments, but I'm not going to dwell on them. I'm going to LIVE a life of NO regrets. F'uck dwelling on the past -- on the what if. I will learn from the bad. i will learn from the mistakes, and MOVE ON.

What does not kill me WILL make me stronger!

WOoOoOoHOo!

 

[PRiSM92289]

listen I dont want to kill your enthusiasm but remember that once your'e off the initial 2 day high, you may revert to some of your older tedencies

see if you can keep these good habits going for 21 days..it takes 21 days to make or break a habit

 

[Buck Rogers]

you are a shark

 

[Bvbidd]

What were the bad things though?

If you block out the bad things then are you really improving yourself? Why didn't you just block out all the original bad stuff then?

Tell us the bad things and you can take a look at it. Dwell on it a bit and see what you did wrong if you don't your just pushing yourself into insanity.

What I mean was were you so "high with happiness and security" or whatever **** your talking about that you did something stupid? And then blocked out the fact you did something stupid and told yourself you had a good day?

 

[Contender]

you are a shark

Yes! :rockon:

Thanks,

listen I dont want to kill your enthusiasm but remember that once your'e off the initial 2 day high, you may revert to some of your older tedencies

see if you can keep these good habits going for 21 days..it takes 21 days to make or break a habit

I'll make it a habit! If it's the last thing I will do; I will change myself for the better! You wait and see!

What were the bad things though?

If you block out the bad things then are you really improving yourself? Why didn't you just block out all the original bad stuff then?

Tell us the bad things and you can take a look at it. Dwell on it a bit and see what you did wrong if you don't your just pushing yourself into insanity.

What I mean was were you so "high with happiness and security" or whatever **** your talking about that you did something stupid? And then blocked out the fact you did something stupid and told yourself you had a good day?

The bad things of my day are mentioned, not in its entirity, but the significant things are aforementioned - failing to act when a beautiful girl crossed my path, retreating from a conversation because I wasn't comfortable - I felt a bit shy - and so on.

Believe me, I'm not blocking them out of my memory. I'm not going to let anything faze me anymore. We all f'uck up, right? I'm going to learn from my mistakes, AND move on!!! I will move on! I will improve in the future, since I have learned from my mistakes - I become wiser, as a result.

 

[True Wolf]

Dude, you rock. You're gonna win this. Pretty soon you'll be putting these other guys to utter shame at your school. Trust me, it's an awsome feeling.

 

[Dante3214]

just a little advice, you might get an emotional relapse and want to quit.

And it's gonna be hard to convince yourself.


Just because you feel like it's hopeless doesn't mean it is ya know...? Anyway.. just had to make sure.

Good Luck Buddy.