"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Your advice on this hugging chick...

djinhell

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Ok, a chick in my class at uni is quite hot. I dont talk to her "that" much to be honest, because most of the people she hangs with I think are a bunch of retards.

But she hugs me quite a bit...Like she hugs me and says hey...then a bit later she'll be like "hug me 'djinhell' " and she'll say sh!t like "your my hugging partner". Its bcoz im quite tall, and shes tall'ish for a girl, so its a comfortable hug. But do you think there could be any more to it than that? She is friendly to other guys in the class though, and to be fair she does hug people quite a bit anyway..

Thing is, im quite reserved and not part of a major clique in my class...Do you think I should up the DJ'ness around this chick...or you think theres nothing to persue? (also, shes kinda dating a guy in the same class..which makes it more awkward for me to flirt, without feeling people eyeballing me)

Also, do you think its possible to start being more Don Juan'esque out of the blue, with people who you were formerly more quiet around, and pull it off convincingly? :crazy:

Cheers guys
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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chinwaggler

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The only way to find out if she's interested is to ask her to do something.

And if they are retards I doubt they are dons. And if you change for the better, people will like your change.
 

Ollie

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djinhell said:
Thing is, im quite reserved and not part of a major clique in my class...Do you think I should up the DJ'ness around this chick...or you think theres nothing to persue? (also, shes kinda dating a guy in the same class..which makes it more awkward for me to flirt, without feeling people eyeballing me)
You need to up your DJ'ness in general...it's like a lifestyle more than a way to act around certain girls. You should project your confident self at all times. Don't worry if people notice you've changed...it's not like you nicknamed yourelf T-Bone and started speaking with an accent or something. And if you like her and casually flirt with her in front of the guy that likes her than he'll probably get all possessive and if they're kinda dating like you said this will push her away a lot and as his value drops yours will go up. Flirt away
 
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thefonz

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Ollie said:
You need to up you DJ'ness in general...it's like a lifestyle more than a way to act around certain girls. You should project your confident self at all times. Don't worry if people notice you've changed...it's not like you nicknamed yourelf T-Bone and started speaking with an accent or something. And if you like her and casually flirt with her in front of the guy that likes her than he'll probably get all possessive and if they're kinda dating like you said this will push her away a lot and as his value drops yours will go up. Flirt away
End of thread. Well said ollie.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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dap

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Tell her your hugs aren't free (in a joking way). The fact that she hugs you probably means that she finds you to be a good guy. You have a lot of work to do if you want it to be more than that, but the hugs give you a green light to slowly try to escalate.
 

djinhell

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Thanks for the advice guys. Thats great advice Ollie...I will apply the general DJ'ness now :woo:
 
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