Yet another case of the ex-bf...

[Mr.Kennedy]

Long time lurker, first time poster.


Ok, so Im 30 years old, currently separated from my wife of 5 years (divorce on the way). So I met this girl from myspace (25 years old, HB8) and started talking to her quite a lot, got her number and got to meet her in person. She told me about how she was just out of a year relationship like 2-3 months ago with this guy that basically treated her like sh*t (usual story here...). So we continued talking and on Tuesday night we were talking on the phone and I told her that I was going to do some shopping on Saturday afternoon and that she was welcome to join me if she wanted to.... she said yes so a date was made. I didnt heard from her on Wednesday nor Thursday, and on Friday I talked to her on MSN, and she told me that she had a really big depression on the last two days (because of her ex-bf, no less). She also told me that she wanted to talk to me on the last 2 days but she didnt called me because I might've thought that she was a "clingy" woman. So I talked to her for a while and told her that I still planned to go to the shopping mall and that she was still invited. She told me as far as she was concerned, plans were still up.
So, Saturday comes, and I sent her a message like 2 hours before I was to leave and she didnt answer back right away. So I continued doing my stuff and as I was about to leave she called me on my cell and told me that she just woke up and that she was very sorry blah blah that she was not going to make it. So I said: cool, whatever, I will still go to do what I was supposed to do.... and that now she owed me. So later that night (yesterday), I sent her a txt message asking what was up? and she told me that she was depressive again. So I told her that she could call me anytime.. of course she didnt.

Shall I forget about her or what? I mean, I really like the girl, but she obviously has issues with her ex-bf that she needs to resolve before she can move on with her life.

 

[Vulpine]

Oooops, It's KaRma Sutra, not Kama. Being backwoods doesn't give one an excuse for poor spelling now. Also, when addressing a man, you should say Mr. as in Mr. KaRma Sutra.

Thank you, Pix

Mr. Vulpine, to you.

 

[woods]

I would consider her nexted, but if she happened to call, I wouldnt make dates. I'd just tell her straight up,(C+F style) if she wants to come over and make out with you, she can. Just dont forget she has baggage, and dont believe her when she says shes over it. Dont "talk" to her about it. Who knows, you might be able to snap her out of it, but dont plan on that happening. Move on and let her do the work if she wants to.

 

[Mr.Kennedy]

Thats what I was thinking about doing... even though Im attracted to her, just move on and let her come to me if she wants to... make myself less available, etc etc.

 

[2Cool]

I agree. She has issues that need to be resolved and you don't need to get involved in any of that. Let her know she can come by or whatever, but don't wait or waste your time. Continue your life. If she can overcome the blues good, if not, good also, this should have no real bearing on the quality of your life.

 

[Carpy]

Sounds like a flake to me. The thought was nice, the possibility was there but i sense more of the same if you try to continue with this girl. You can use her as someone to chat with when your on msn or whatever, but that looks to be about all the commitment you'll get from this girl.

I would say, in a few weeks she'll be totally available and want to meet with you for real. Right about the time the guy she's actually seeing right now is done with her games.
When women truly available, they will be around in my experience. Period. All women, no natter if they are HB4 or HB14, have a guy at the moment. May not be serious, but their time is focused on a guy. No matter what they say.

 

[edmond]

Long time lurker, first time poster.


Ok, so Im 30 years old, currently separated from my wife of 5 years (divorce on the way). So I met this girl from myspace (25 years old, HB8) and started talking to her quite a lot, got her number and got to meet her in person. She told me about how she was just out of a year relationship like 2-3 months ago with this guy that basically treated her like sh*t (usual story here...). So we continued talking and on Tuesday night we were talking on the phone and I told her that I was going to do some shopping on Saturday afternoon and that she was welcome to join me if she wanted to.... she said yes so a date was made. I didnt heard from her on Wednesday nor Thursday, and on Friday I talked to her on MSN, and she told me that she had a really big depression on the last two days (because of her ex-bf, no less). She also told me that she wanted to talk to me on the last 2 days but she didnt called me because I might've thought that she was a "clingy" woman. So I talked to her for a while and told her that I still planned to go to the shopping mall and that she was still invited. She told me as far as she was concerned, plans were still up.
So, Saturday comes, and I sent her a message like 2 hours before I was to leave and she didnt answer back right away. So I continued doing my stuff and as I was about to leave she called me on my cell and told me that she just woke up and that she was very sorry blah blah that she was not going to make it. So I said: cool, whatever, I will still go to do what I was supposed to do.... and that now she owed me. So later that night (yesterday), I sent her a txt message asking what was up? and she told me that she was depressive again. So I told her that she could call me anytime.. of course she didnt.

Shall I forget about her or what? I mean, I really like the girl, but she obviously has issues with her ex-bf that she needs to resolve before she can move on with her life.

Drop her ASAP, she sounds like a Fvck Head, if she still thinks of her Ex BF then the BS will NEVER end.

 

[Mr.Kennedy]

^ And this is what Ive come to realize.... and as stupid as it will sound.. I didnt called her or nothing since that day and this morning I talked to her on MSN and she was like: I would like to see you, blah blah.... so I didnt even acknowledge the comment and just went about my day like I normally do.

I cannot expect a LTR with her at all at this stage but thats cool with me because until I get a divorce I dont have jack sh*t to offer to nobody.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Beware of being the "rebound guy" :nono:

(Especially on MySpace.)

 

[Mr.Kennedy]

Beware of being the "rebound guy" :nono:

(Especially on MySpace.)

I know. This is why I have backed away from her since the day of the incident.... to prevent further contact with her and also to avoid falling into the "rebound guy" trap now that I have enough time to do so (not too involved,etc)