"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Would you attend a Yonge Adults group if you are old?

Aristippus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
578
Reaction score
141
I just got this email from a local church who is having a Yonge Adults meet-up this Friday. Social circle games have not worked with me in the past and I'm not sure why I would care about trying something out as I'm older, if it never worked when I was younger.

Would you attend a Yonge Adults group with the hopes of meeting young single women or would it likely be a sausage fest/waste of time in that regard?

My mother thinks I look more mature and even with a haircut can barely pass for under 40 with my own looks. This is not like a number of years ago when I could have passed for under 20. But even then, say in 2013 (when my hair was greyed and not cut), I was booted out of one church Young Adults group for looking too old.

But then again, you could lie about your age and falsely claim you have a genetic disorder that makes you look older (ie if there is someone policing your age, but don't say that lie to the women, etc....)
I don't think going is a good idea. And don't lie about your age. Only women do that. Don't be self-conscious about your age but also don't be an unwelcome party crasher just because you accidentally received an invitation. Go to something where age isn't a requirement.

Going would be kind of like going to a spiritual retreat for women only. Your presence won't be welcomed because in that situation you don't meet the criteria. Context is everything and the same people who would welcome you in one situation (a general gathering for example), would not welcome you in another (age or gender-specific gatherings).
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Top