"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Wife resents early retiree husband even though they easily have enough $

MatureDJ

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http://www.slate.com/articles/life/...band_retired_young_and_goofs_off_all_day.html

My husband achieved professional success and wealth early in life. His work involved long hours and lots of stress, and by his 30s he decided that he wanted out. His accumulated wealth could easily support our lifestyle indefinitely, so he retired about 18 months ago, shortly after the birth of our first child. He has not found anything to do in that time! We have an excellent nanny 40 hours a week, and outside those hours my husband is an extremely involved father. We split the domestic duties roughly 50–50, as before, but now I am the only one working and he says he shouldn’t be "penalized" by having extra domestic responsibilities. So he spends the week ****ing around (gym, squash, books, movies, etc.). It's making me crazy with resentment, especially when I come home from a hard day at work. He tells me I should just quit if I don’t like it, and that I shouldn’t worry about being dependent because he’s set up a trust fund for me and our son. But I also think it sets a bad example for our son to see a father who doesn't have some productive purpose in life. My husband disagrees and says he will be "an excellent corrective to the productionist propaganda schools inflict on kids to make them the unquestioning worker bees the economy demands." He says he doesn't care if our son grows up to work hard and that work is a lamentable necessity and it is only “false consciousness” to think otherwise. I'm tired of this devolving into a sociological debate! How can we resolve this?
My opinion of the wife: :down:

My advice for the husband: Take the division of property hit and get the hell out! :woo:
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Greasy Pig

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Reminds me of the "man store" joke where a woman gets to choose a man of increasing worth with each level she ascends.
The only catch is they can't go back a level once they proceed up.
On level 5 are seemingly perfect men but still the woman in the story goes to see what's on level 6 where a sign reads: Congratulations, you are the 10,345,456th woman to come to this level. There are no men here. Fvck off back to the ground floor.
Moral of the story is: No matter how good a man is, or how good a woman has it, she still has the capacity to think there's something better.
 

The Duke

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The second moral of the story: Women will always bitsch.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear MDJ,
Seems a very unlikely scenario to me...probably the product of the imagination,of a Cub Reporter who once studied Sociology.
Just loved GP's story,it has a lot of truth in it....I think it can go on for a life time,perhaps once many,many years ago a good looking bloke was very hard up and took her out for a few weeks...from then on that is her metier...it gets worse,sometimes that Man becomes chrystallised in her head space,right into later life,and she will be unhappy with anyone inferior...this is her dream Man and she will prefer the Company of Cats and Goldfish to the sort of Guy who might find her attractive!
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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