"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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why the disappearance?

thebiglimp

Don Juan
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I had this happen twice now within a year, almost same scenario, both very frustrating.
This is the recent one. The other girl previous to it was way more flirty, with skinship, but rest are about the same.

Met this girl for a drink and there was a solid connection. She seemed like a down to earth girl so i didnt try anything physical but at the end she did initiate hugging, and right after we parted she messeges me that she's had wonderful time, would love to get together again.
So the next day we text back and forth setting up the next date, and at the end after i ask if the next weekend is ok, there is no reply. Almost 24 hrs later still no reply. I know not to be clingly, could be other factors blah blah, but these days and age, especially for people my city? Its already abnormal to not check the phone every 30 freakin min.

So, is it

A) did she play me to see how willing i was to see her again?

B) did i make her back off because i was too aggressive with setting up the date?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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pyros

Master Don Juan
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Well, may guys here would tell you that you fvcked it up because:
1 You did not try to kiss her
2 You texted her too soon after the first date.

Well, this is probably true but I guess the real reason is that: SHE DID NOT REALLY LIKED YOU. Simple as that.

She hasn't replied to your text? fine, forget about her and if she has some interest she will text you, but do not text her again unless you want to look like a complete beta.
 

ThePasses

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Well, may guys here would tell you that you fvcked it up because:
1 You did not try to kiss her
2 You texted her too soon after the first date.

Well, this is probably true but I guess the real reason is that: SHE DID NOT REALLY LIKED YOU. Simple as that.

She hasn't replied to your text? fine, forget about her and if she has some interest she will text you, but do not text her again unless you want to look like a complete beta.
Did you read his second post in the thread? It read: "n/m.. she replied. its a go :)."

I can see how one would be of the opinion that he is coming off a little beta but since homegirl is going to meet up with him soon let's ease up for now because he's winning for the time being.
 

Serenity

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Sometimes they do take some time to reply for various reasons. Sending more messages will most definitely come off as desperate. There's only one correct course of action after sending a message.

This is very very simple and yet many guys fail at it. If there is no reply, then do nothing about it. Many guys send more messages, call or contact with other means, don't do it. I would say if there's been no reply within a week you can send one more message, but only after a week. If there's still no reply within a day, consider it dead. In the case she does contact after some time, then do not comment on the time and proceed as you normally would.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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