"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Whooo, first rejection of the week (or at least I'm taking it as a rejection)

Kal0051

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So I met this chick a few weeks ago when she started at my work. Started talking to her at work, and thought I was building some decent comfort and rapport. So I asked her for her number a couple weeks ago. She gives it up freely and started initiating convos after that. We texted back and forth a few times since but nothing huge. Anyway, we're texted a bit tonight and I suggest we go for a drink sometime. That's when the texts stop from her, like not even a no. WTF!! And she texts other guys I work with to see if they want to grab a drink but won't even do me the courtesy of saying no.

Bah, just want to get it off my chest. This is getting frustrating.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Giles

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Sounds like a ***** to me. Which is good, I do like those. Just stop talking to her salvage your credibility. When she goes through every guy at work she'll prolly come onto you again. When that happens. Don't suggest a drink sometime. Do something in the immediate future. I like to find out what food a girl likes and then make it for myself and my roommates and have them help pay for it then when we're almost done txt a girl u got whatever it is if she'd like some. Eat almost all of it before she gets there, then be like it's pretty much all gone you were too slow. Then take her out to dinner and a few drinks to make it up. Don't talk sexually, and more often than not they'll give plenty of iois whether they want you or not. When the moments right don't hesitate to strike. Go with two strikes and if u fail drop her like a bad habit instantly.

* on a side note I don't suggest dating or casually sleeping with girls at work. It's hard to keep outta the workplace.
 

Kal0051

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Well, now got 2 rejections in 1 day. Gave a girl I know a call. Ask her if she wants to meet up sometime. She tells me she got back with her boyfriend that lives 5 hours away.

As for the other girl, I don't plan to talk to her anymore. I don't need to talk to her to do my job so won't be a problem. One of the other guys at my work will probably fvck her anyway (he's slept with most of the hot girls there). In fact I know that's what he's planning and he seems to be WAY a head of me.
 

Tyson420

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Observe what that guy is doing and use it to improve your own game.

Don't just swagger jack, just think about it. Really.
 

Kal0051

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Tyson420 said:
Observe what that guy is doing and use it to improve your own game.

Don't just swagger jack, just think about it. Really.
he doesn't seem to be doing anything different than me. He talks to them at work, and invites them to grab a drink with him. What he does after that I don't know.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Tyson420

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Damn, he's sick with it. Sorry man, you should chill with him and try to get some pointers off him.
 

Kal0051

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Tyson420 said:
Damn, he's sick with it. Sorry man, you should chill with him and try to get some pointers off him.
maybe, but I get the feeling the guy doesn't like me that much. There used to be this one girl that would ask me to come with them every time he asked her to grab a drink with him, and he seemed annoyed by it.
 

thecurtainfalls

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Kal, what exactly are you saying to these girls? You might be making it a little too obvious for them.

"Let's get drinks sometime" - if said un-smoothly or abruptly (i.e. not enough comfort/attraction yet) translates in her brain to Hey, let's go somewhere alone where it's dark enough and you might be drunk enough to accept my advances.

"Let's get dinner one time" - if the comfort level isn't there between you yet, this is basically saying Hey, let's start the antiquated and predictable courtship ritual that takes all the fun, mystery, and excitement out of the dating process!

Now, I'm obviously exaggerating a little here, but remember that girls like to have fun when they're flirting too. Think about the subtext of what you're saying -- not just what you're saying, but what it's ultimately sub-communicating. If it's too obvious, it comes off as pushy. Pushy = desperate = not a lot of options = not a good man for her to 'mate' with (evolutionarily speaking).

It's easy to go, 'oh, she's a b!tch, she rejected me' and not learn anything from a "rejection". I know because I had that mindset for a long time. But the reality is that there are always things that you can do or say better; work on calibrating this stuff a little bit, specifically maybe boosting your comfort/attraction level with these girls before trying to isolate them, and see where that gets ya.

Hope this helps a little. Good luck.
 
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