Where is the Bull's Eye?

[The Comeback Kid]

About a month ago, I made a thread about girls and how they can act a bit b!tchy, snobby, ignorant or pretentious in class: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=157706 (refer to my posts 1 and 8 on that thread. I made that post because in a couple of my classes over the past year, I seemed to be getting a bad rap among my girl classmates (these were small, discussion-sized classes)). The consensus from you guys was that girls secretly resent males who are superior to them (in class atleast).

That brings me to a public speaking class I am in this semester. For the first couple weeks, I thought things were going to take this familiar route. I've had plenty of experience speaking in front of others, so the speeches we were presenting were nothing new for me (and thus I'm doing very well). I couldn't really get anyone to converse before class or during breaks; I just brought a newspaper in and waited for class to start, the other guys in the class were getting positive feedback from the girls while I didn't hear much of anything, and the girls would roll their eyes whenever the Professor lauded my speech. But very lately, things have changed.

This past week, we delivered our most recent speeches. I believe I presented my best speech of the semester so far (used a lot of props, had some good jokes/audience participation, no hitches or stutters, timing was perfect) and felt really good about it. To my surprise, the girls were giving me constant praise and saying I did a "fantastic job." In fact, a few people were using speech tactics I was using in their speeches after me! Over the past couple of classes, it seems the girls who I sit close to or interact with the most are beginning to open up a bit and we'll even stop for a short convo outside of the classroom. This phenomenon has just started, so my next step will be seeing if anyone is available outside of class (I don't know them real well yet, but things are improving).

I'm trying to figure this one out...what could have caused this quick turnaround? Is it just people all-of-a-sudden being more familiar with one another, as we're halfway through the semester? Did something I do or something I have done lately in the class change the balance of our relations for the better? My conspiracy side suggests they're trying to make me feel comfortable so I don't go 100% the rest of the way, but that's crazy talk...I hope. :crazy:

 

[Mr. Bond]

I took a public speaking class and noticed something similar. I didn't have the initial negative reactions, but they were neutral if not at least being pleasant/polite.

I had given a couple speeches that stuck to the script of what the teacher wanted and they were technically very good, but I treated them like work.

About halfway through the semester, I decided to have some fun with our next one. So I threw in some jokes, made up some characters, and made sure to keep it informative as well. After giving this speech, the girls in the class always reacted VERY positively and took the time to initiate conversation with me for the rest of the semester.

Why the turnaround? Here's my theory. First, it shows you know how to have fun. Second, it shows that you aren't afraid to be in the spotlight and you don't care what people think of you. Third, it shows that you're a good potential leader (alpha). Girls love alphas.

Sounds to me like you're getting that reaction from your recent speech, and the negative reaction they've given you is from how you act normally. Don't act like such a know-it-all and keep that fun attitude from your speech.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

I took a public speaking class and noticed something similar. I didn't have the initial negative reactions, but they were neutral if not at least being pleasant/polite.

I had given a couple speeches that stuck to the script of what the teacher wanted and they were technically very good, but I treated them like work.

About halfway through the semester, I decided to have some fun with our next one. So I threw in some jokes, made up some characters, and made sure to keep it informative as well. After giving this speech, the girls in the class always reacted VERY positively and took the time to initiate conversation with me for the rest of the semester.

Why the turnaround? Here's my theory. First, it shows you know how to have fun. Second, it shows that you aren't afraid to be in the spotlight and you don't care what people think of you. Third, it shows that you're a good potential leader (alpha). Girls love alphas.

Sounds to me like you're getting that reaction from your recent speech, and the negative reaction they've given you is from how you act normally. Don't act like such a know-it-all and keep that fun attitude from your speech.

I may have made things sound a little bit worse than they were, but the main point was nothing good was coming out of these interactions. While I've done very well on all of my graded speeches so far this semester (technically I'm "in the spotlight" during all of my speeches), I did enjoy presenting this one the most. The having fun and showing alpha qualities definitely could be a great point. I don't feel I act like a "know-it-all," rather I just went about my business in the class.

So ONE really great speech can turn me from being somewhat irrelevant to everybody's favorite? The only fallacy here is that I have FANS...does this mean if my next speech isn't quite as good, I'm going to lose the positivity from all these girls?

 

[Interceptor]

CK, this is ALL about needing ego validation.
You're treading very dangerous territory here.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

CK, this is ALL about needing ego validation.
You're treading very dangerous territory here.

Definitely a valid point. However, there's a little more to this. The area I attend school very much favors the 21+ crowds, atleast this year (many bars and also dwindling house parties). Soon this won't be a problem for me, but for the meantime it is.

Back to the topic, if these parties are a virtual no-go, where is the best place to frequently run into and meet people? IN CLASS! From these classes I can find people I click with well and go from there. If I can't make new friends in the classroom or through my extra-curricular things, I don't know where I will.

As I mentioned at the start of this thread, I've experienced some negative vibes from groups of girls in some of my classes. This one class hasn't been terribly bad, but as I said I usually read the newspaper before class since no one was really open to starting a conversation with me. Now, I present this one brilliant speech, and some of these girls want to talk to me and are cool now? I'm still confused how one in-class speech changed these people's perspectives.