When you both go no contact.

[LostAndConfused]

Dating this cute girl, she's one of two plates currently, and she's extremely interested in me. A friend of mine overheard her and her friends saying really good things about me when I wasn't around. Some of her friends practically worship me, so there's some preselection in my favor.

Got a lay last Friday, didn't talk to her much afterwards until later that night when she sent me a text and we flirted a little.

Then Sunday we talked a little more, mainly about me and my buddies plans for an underground weekly party. I grew tired of her texts so I left her last one unresponded.

Still haven't talked to her since Sunday, but part of me thinks that we're in some stupid little game over who will break and reinitiate first.

Should I reinitiate? Has she met another guy, or should I continue going NC until she either breaks or nexts?

This is definitely the horny time of the month for her, so part of me wants to just say fvck it and leave her pre-emptively before I get the flakiness, assuming she leaped seats on the carousel. I haven't been in a situation like this before because most of the time the NCs are from the ONS

 

[bigneil]

This is exactly what happened to me. Many pretend this means getting dumped (even when we didn't have a commitment to begin with, an impossibility). When you had sex with the girl last time you saw her and you never called her again, you didn't get dumped.

No, in my opinion it comes down to who has the upper hand. Often in a relationship you will come down to a choice: you can have HER, or you can have her RESPECT. I always choose the latter. I walked away 19 days ago and if she doesn't contact me again then it's over, so you know what I recommend.

Remember: whoever has the power to walk away controls the relationship. That's what this comes down to.

Control or Bust.

 

[JoelyBoy]

The thing is, you didn't reply to her last text, so she may be waiting for you to make the first contact after that! otherwise, from my point of view, not getting a reply and then texting again would be totally afc so she might be in the same mind set. I'd text her, what will you lose? if you do text you might get more of the good stuff

 

[LostAndConfused]

She's not low quality, relative to other girls. But I think all women are low quality given the right time of the month, right circumstances, and rigt level of inebriation.

This is confusing because normally in this situation, I can assume low interest, not text for a while them get the "hey stranger, " reopen from the girl. This girl is less experienced with men though, she's a freshman.

Usually not responding to a text right away is alright, but once no answer has gone on for a couple days I think it becomes a competition. And I think I'd rather not send the first text because then I face the low interest texts, and I can always tell when texts are low interest.

Also I'm running on fumes when it comes to plates. Most potential newcomers have been less attractive though, only 5s and 6s. It's hard to spin at my uni.

Lostandconfused low on plates is like superman wearing a kryptonite condom. Shes not getting it superpowered.


Usually girls can somehow tell I'm spinning other plates, even if we only interact thru text.

 

[r0cky]

Why are you trying to keep no contact? whats your goal?

 

[LostAndConfused]

Bigneil said it best - to have control. And if having control means I don't end up talking to her again, so be it. I like this girl, she's fun but I don't want a relationship. My distrust in females combined with my player swagger makes me a horrifically bad boyfriend.

However I have talked to her since we last hooked up

I'm still under te impression that no contact is a **** test young girls do to see if you give her te upper hand, especially when she starts having feelings for you

 

[ArcBound]

Just restart the conversation. No need to mention or apologize that you dropped the last text. If you are worried about her trying to get hand over you and not responding to your subsequent texts then just call her and you won't have to worry.

2nd I don't think you look like a chump when you reinitiate a text especially when she was the one who texted last and you left her hanging. The only possible thing I can see happening is she getting mad or passive aggressive at you, but she'll just have to get over that.

 

[loveshogun]

Still haven't talked to her since Sunday, but part of me thinks that we're in some stupid little game over who will break and reinitiate first.

It feels like a stupid game, because it is a stupid game, and you're turning it into a stupider one by asking us whether you should contact the girl you're banging.

If you're playing all your cards right, who the hell cares who initiates first? Just get it done.

Though, given that you're being this analytical about something so unimportant, my guess is that this will end poorly.

Just a guess. No disrespect, but really - where is the problem here?

 

[MisterD]

I think most of us are guilty of this at one point or another.

Certain things irk me. I feel like we do so much in order to improve our value and open these girls, the least they can do from time to time is contact first.

So sometimes my stubborn ego gets in the way and i'll just let her walk away, just so i can have piece of mind.

however, sometimes piece of ass is better than piece of mind. if she really does dig you, and you heard she was saying good things about you, hit her up first. be the man. dont play these games. being stubborn rarely, if ever, gets you laid

 

[LostAndConfused]

You make a good point but I don't think its stubbornness. In this day in age you actually are giving up the power in contacting

"Being the man" sounds reasonable from a logical standpoint, no?

But these are very illogical minds we're working with. Especially young ones. Being a man gets twisted by young girls to "being desparate, needy, clingy." The same qualities they look for when they're 28 and ugly.

I know she's interested, or at least she was come Sunday, so think I'm going to stay no contact.

If she can get over her ego and reach out to me, I'll continue seeing her. If she hooks up with someone else during these mega-fertile days, then it's good that I didn't text her anyways. It's a win-win going no contact.

Thanks for the input guys. I still really don't understand the initiating contact part of game very well it seems, if you have any other thoughts or have favorite blogs that have commented on this subject please leave them here!!! thnx

 

[bigneil]

Has anyone ever tried to dump a girl who really likes them at the moment? She will freak out and get totally AFC and annoy the hell out of you. She'll text non-stop to the point where you want a restraining order.

Walking away is a pretty safe bet.

"Love never dies of starvation but often of indigestion." Ninon de Lenclos