Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

When to stop hunting

Murk

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Ok so I’m a little burned out with chasing tail. Had a successful 2018 season and started 2019 with drama and upheaval of circumstances. I now have a new job (potentially already leaving next week to secure a leadership role jumping 2 years minimum ahead in career with more challenge and responsibility/ownership). Sara moves out and I’m back to living alone and I’m 5 days no contact - I refuse to engage with her.

I just want to work on myself this year with gym and saving money (the more I’ve earned the more I spent) while getting a handle on my alcohol and drug consumption (I’ve been drug free over a month but still drink but I haven’t been hammered in over a month).

I have 2 plates, Sophie and Spanish Maria, both nice and do things for me, give me the affection/love that I’ve craved for 6 months living with Sara. Both pay 50/50 and both give good sex, bj, hugs, kisses etc.

Shall I just settled with this for now and get off OLD and spend more nights in?

Past 2 fridays I stayed home sober which I haven’t done in a long time and I’m getting used to staying home and not needing to go out drink/drugging and spending **** loss of cash.

I’m 30 now and I have issues to work through, time for some peace and reflection while having sex at least 1-2 times a week without needing to spend money?
 

Murk

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seems like you are needy for emotional support

i suggest therapist
I will be seeking another one, although I think taking constant substance abuse out of my life and a healthy lifestyle will be enough.

According to my friends who are very stable/sane I just need to work on substance abuse and anger management
 

sosousage

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I will be seeking another one, although I think taking constant substance abuse out of my life and a healthy lifestyle will be enough.

According to my friends who are very stable/sane I just need to work on substance abuse and anger management
if therapists asks about ur job and how much u earn maybe she will be impresed and u will bang her
 

backseatjuan

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Sara moves out and I’m back to living alone and I’m 5 days no contact - I refuse to engage with her.
I remember a thread from about a month ago, she was moving out. Then from couple of days ago I remember how you brought her australian driver license. With you man, it's all about Sara.

I just want to work on myself this year while getting a handle on my alcohol and drug consumption
There you go, here is the reason you got Sara in your life. Got you!

Past 2 fridays I stayed home sober
Good start man, you still have the other 6 days out of week to do cocaine and get fcked up and call Sara telling how much you love her.

sex at least 1-2 times a week
How much sex do you get per week between Sara, Sophie, and Maria? Did you mean at most instead of at least?
 

mrgoodstuff

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I will be seeking another one, although I think taking constant substance abuse out of my life and a healthy lifestyle will be enough.

According to my friends who are very stable/sane I just need to work on substance abuse and anger management
Substance abuse and partying can be replaced with fulfilling new habits and hobbies.
 

Dr.Suave

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I would concentrate on Sophie and Maria. Start valuating if they are good LTR or wife material. If you marry the spanish girl you get a bonus nationality.
 

Murk

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I’m learning Spanish too which Maria is helping me with, I can speak and understand it now and I feel like I’m actually benefiting myself.

Neither are wife material though, just something to fill a gap for now, is that selfish? I’ve not strung either girl along they both know I’m not commiting. Both are not hot enough or intelligent enough, I need mental stimulation and great looks, both are poor compared to me too.

I’m also throwing a party at my place on Saturday for close friends, I need some love/strength, it’s been a long month.

I am going to accept the new job which means 20% jump in salary within 4 weeks, plus I have commission rolling in immediately as part of my terms and 2 direct reports. This new responsibility is exactly what I need. I now have a purpose, people looking to me and a reason to be alive. As sad/weak as it sounds that’s my reality. My old therapist said I didn’t care enough about myself and since my mum died I honestly haven’t cared about living or consequences which I think many people go though after grief/trauma.

Anyway, this will be my best year, I’m 30, I’m strong.
 

Dr.Suave

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I’m learning Spanish too which Maria is helping me with, I can speak and understand it now and I feel like I’m actually benefiting myself.

Neither are wife material though, just something to fill a gap for now, is that selfish? I’ve not strung either girl along they both know I’m not commiting. Both are not hot enough or intelligent enough, I need mental stimulation and great looks, both are poor compared to me too.

I’m also throwing a party at my place on Saturday for close friends, I need some love/strength, it’s been a long month.

I am going to accept the new job which means 20% jump in salary within 4 weeks, plus I have commission rolling in immediately as part of my terms and 2 direct reports. This new responsibility is exactly what I need. I now have a purpose, people looking to me and a reason to be alive. As sad/weak as it sounds that’s my reality. My old therapist said I didn’t care enough about myself and since my mum died I honestly haven’t cared about living or consequences which I think many people go though after grief/trauma.

Anyway, this will be my best year, I’m 30, I’m strong.
Pues que chingon que estes aprendiendo espanol compi. Yo tmb te voy a ayudar a practicar.
 

LiveYourDream

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Anyway, this will be my best year, I’m 30, I’m strong.
Congrats on the new job! I encourage you to switch up your life, and spend some time and focus on what is most meaningful to you. Take time to take care of you first. Some time and space to heal. Reconnect with yourself, at your core. Get clear. Get clear about who you are, what you truly value, and what will truly most fulfill you. From there, then you can design the life you most want for yourself moving forward. Wishing you your best year yet!
 
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Murk

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At least take a break from manwhoring so you can focus on your new job.

If you want to go back to the game a little later, fine. You still have two plates for now.
Yeah agreed, I was only manwhoring this past year as my gf ended it with me and it felt like grief/loss all over again and I dealt with my loss by obtaining affection and a rush from sex and female company.

I already feel stabilised, actually more like “been there done that”, time to think long term.

Has anyone made a major step up in career responsibility/prospect wise and just taken the bull by the horn and propelled the self into the unknown but also greatness? That’s what I feel I’m embarking upon.

Congrats on the new job! I encourage you to switch up your life, and spend some time and focus on what is most meaningful to you. Take time to take care of you first. Some time and space to heal. Reconnect with yourself, at your core. Get clear. Get clear about who you are, what you truly value, and what what will truly most fulfill you. From there, then you can design the life you most want for yourself moving forward. Wishing you your best year yet!
Thanks for your continued support and positivity in PMs too! Means a lot xx!
 

LiveYourDream

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Keeping it simple with the two women sounds like a good set up for now. Stay aware and should you find yourself starting to get attached, to either one, best to change it up right away! You don't want to risk letting yourself get too attached to any woman who you know is not a great LTR fit for you.

I suspect you will meet another one soon who lights you up. Take care of you first and foremost.
 

GrowingPains

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Neither are wife material though, just something to fill a gap for now, is that selfish?
Nah man. Because:
I’ve not strung either girl along they both know I’m not commiting
Has anyone made a major step up in career responsibility/prospect wise and just taken the bull by the horn and propelled the self into the unknown but also greatness? That’s what I feel I’m embarking upon.

Conquer that sh!t brother. It's go time. I suggest thinking about why it is you feel so empowered by this opportunity. That way if things get tough you can remember the 'why' and use it to power through and stay the course.
 
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SoSuave666

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Bro you're depressed. Like severely. You self medicate with drugs and alcohol, depend on women for your validation...

You may also have some other mental health problems due to your mother's death which totally sucks. My novice recommendation is to take time away from women for a few months. Don't game at all. If they are willing to come over to yours late at night for sex when you need it go ahead. But otherwise just focus on getting your MIND right. The human brain is so powerful what you think you CAN become. Just re-focus, there's absolutely no shame in admitting you have faults and things you need to take care of.
 
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