When a girl goes cold, can you call her out on it?

[Meisterman]

If a girl you were dating for months suddenly goes cold and starts ignoring you out of nowhere, pretending you don't exist and doesn't confront you about it. Before you go NC for good do you call her out on her bull****? Even if it's just a text since you may not see her face to face. I agree with that going no contact is the best solution for when a girl flakes on you/loses interest. But the problem with no contact is a lot of it still seems about her. I see dudes posting "Oh ya I've been 46 days and 3 hours without contacting so and so" but really it's just fukin pathetic that he's even still thinking about that or it's on his mind at all. Ideally no contact should just make it so she doesn't exist in your universe anymore. Like you're not even thinking about her at all and you don't hold grudges. But my question is... When a girl flakes like this. Mind you after she said she wants to visit you in college, says she's your girlfriend, wants you to be exclusive, talks to you almost every day, etc. then she goes cold with NO explanation, by flaking on a scheduled hangout and never initiating convo again. Like what the fuk? I know girls are flakey, I know you gotta move on and just let it be. I know there's probably another dude in the picture also. And I know many guys think it's beta to try and get the last word or break NC and text her. But what about all this sh*t I just wanna get off my chest. Like I want to put her in her place and let her know I'm not mad, but I'm also not fukin stupid. And what she did was incredibly rude and disrespectful. And I'll probably leave it at that. There are more details I'll leave out for times sake but trust me when I say it's pretty bad. I'm not interested in getting back together, but I feel like I got the weight of the world on my back from this. I just wanna get it off my chest and move on. By going 'no contact' I feel like I'm in some sort of relationship purgatory, waiting for closure and not knowing or expecting to get it. So basically if a girl really does flake hard after leading you on, is it okay to set her straight once more before stopping contact? Not in an angry way but just in a "I'm not gonna take your **** and I'm not falling for your stupid games" type of way. I don't care if it's perceived as desperate or beta, etc. because ultimately it's about helping me move on and getting these words off my chest. Right now she probably thinks I still want to get back together with her and I'm sure it boasts her ego to feel like she has control over the situation, since I've last contacted her about hanging out when she blew me off cold. I just feel like once I tell her straight up it will help me move forward, because right now I still have some unsaid words and thoughts that I'd like to set straight before I move on entirely.

 

[Poop1337]

I would call them out in a detached way. Fine I'm done with you. Thanks for pissing me off. We're over. Then go NC

 

[Sino Zane]

If you have numerous other girls in your life, why would you call out a girl or even care if she "went cold"? She's ignoring you? So the **** what? Stop contacting her unless she contacts you first, and focus on other, hotter women.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Dude...

When I'm not on here giving advice or working on videos at home, I also do rideshare driving (i.e. Uber, Lyft). And, on Friday and Saturday nights, I have girls that get into my car with their girlfriends and have very interesting conversations. A couple of weeks ago, I was driving these 2 girls to a night spot, and their conversation went something like this:

GIRL A: So, you wanna go with me to the museum?
GIRL B: Sure! But wait, weren't you going to go with (name of guy)?
GIRL A: No, I don't think so... we've been out on 3 dates so far, and on the last one he acted kinda weird. I'm not ready to dump him yet, but I don't wanna ruin a good trip to the museum by taking him!
GIRL B: When's the last time you talked to him?
GIRL A: Ugh, I've been avoiding his phone calls and he's been texting me like crazy asking me when we can go out again. I just told him I've been sick, and I'll let him know when I'm better...

What's the point of sharing this convo with you? To point out that WOMEN ARE VERY, VERY CONSCIOUS OF WHEN THEY'RE IGNORING YOU, and when they do it, it's because they NO LONGER WANT TO BE AROUND YOU.

In short: there's no point in calling her out because she already knows she's ignoring you and she's doing it on PURPOSE. All you're going to end up doing is telling her a bunch of stuff she already knows. Yes, your ego will think it has the upper hand by saying the final words, but she's still going to end up getting what she wants, i.e. not having to be around you. Furthermore, by doing what you're wanting to do, it's going to let her know you still feel some kind of way about her, which will ultimately end up stroking HER ego. Remember: girls get off on emotion, so even if you feel like the emotions you'll be giving her are negative ones, a part of her will still be happy to know that she was able to make you feel such strong things about her.

Hope this helps!

 

[Thundernuts]

Hey man. Been in your shoes before and all i can say is Harry Wilmington is spot on with his advice. I had a chick pull this crap on me after two months and to make a long story short, there was just that point where i realised it doesnt matter how cruel or how nice or how indifferent you are. Once a woman feels that she is all you think about, there is nothing you can do to change that.

Except improve yourself.

Thats it, only way she will feel any kind of remorse for what she did to you is you improve yourself, work out, get a better chick, stuff like that. Then she will realise how stupid she was.

I know everyone says "Improve yourself" "Go NC" but they say this because(with very few situational exceptions) that is what you need to do. I know how you feel, and I know what you want to do, but I also know that it is an entirely wasted effort on your part and I strongly advise not sending her anything.

Never know how long women will go around showing off txt messages to people. Food for thought.

 

[hudpes]

Well, my view of the matter differs slightly. Men and women can have a change of heart and the other party shouldn't be angry about it, in a way, it's not personal, so any vendettas are pointless.

Men are direct and women come up with excuses and lies to avoid confrontation. It's how they are, guys, can't blame them for that... I definitely would not send them anything angry or confrontational or passive aggressive, her silence speaks volumes, and if you are who you want to be (alpha) you absolutely have no problem with it, just take the next in line. What peaks their interest later on is how easy you took it, even if they're with another guy they're wondering what was going on, did they mean so little to you? Were you banging someone on the side??

But you shouldn't even be thinking about how they feel once this happens, it's not your business -you should be indifferent to whether or not they feel any remorse.

 

[Poop1337]

I've had the old I'm mad at you for ignoring me work out though. They're all like I'm not ignoring you, are you really mad at me? It doesn't hurt to just outcome independently call them out then move on.