Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

What's up with my new girl?!?

That's Me

New Member
Joined
Jun 17, 2006
Messages
2
Reaction score
0
Location
Germany.
Hey fellas,

about two weeks ago I regognized this sexy girl in my new school... we started to flirt immediately and last week she started to send me messages to my phone (she got the number from a friend of mine).

Well, last Friday we had our first date... and I had a beautiful time with her: nice conversations and the sex was good as well.

Now the problem is that she seems to be VERY insecure! To a certain degree this can be very cute, but she's extreme! Within the last week we saw each other every second day, we talked a lot on the phone, we are sending us messages like crazy, and, of course, we are meeting us every day in school. Even tho, I'm looking for LTR and a girl who admires me, this is a little bit too much... this week seems like a month to me and my own interest-level is going down, unfortunately.

Furthermore: she's extremely jealous, she already talked about marriage, and she's mad everytime I say or do something that could offend her. Therefore it's almost impossible to be '****y and funny' (and that's a part of my nature) and to play hard to get... she would overreact and go crazy!

What do you think... is such a sensitive and insecure girl a huge problem? I'm just scared that my relationship with her will end in chaos and destruction! Should I end it all up before the trouble (and my feelings for her) go up extremely?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Jariel

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2004
Messages
4,413
Reaction score
297
Location
UK
My girlfriend was a bit like this too to begin with and her interest was so high and she was getting so serious that it kinda scared me a little and I had a few doubts. It was just a case of too much too soon for me and I wasn't willing to alter my life and put off my friends at that stage.

However, I purposely created some distance and stuck to seeing her no more than 2 times per week. I occasionally put off seeing her a whole week and that time apart helped a LOT. It allowed me to see friends, get on top of everyday chores and do my own thing and made me look forward to seeing her a lot more!

My advice would be to see her only 2 times per week. Politely tell her you have things you need to do on those other days (work, study, family etc), but reassure her that you look forward to seeing her. I'm certain that both of you will benefit from this! Ease up on the calls and text messages too - maybe one or two texts per day at the very most!



Some insecure women are self destructive, they'll fool around with lots of guys for the attention and make your life a living nightmare. However, if she's into you and only you, then you are onto a great thing! There's nothing better than having a girlfriend who idolises you and as long as she's respectful to you, I'd say it's definitely worth giving her a chance!

My girlfriend is a very confident girl, very attractive and gets checked out and hit on a lot, but when it comes to ME, she gets very insecure, emotional and jealous. High interest brings out these traits sometimes.
 

flexion_

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2003
Messages
1,617
Reaction score
10
Age
56
Every woman is insecure - so get used to it.

Don't be so available and it will make the time you are together better. Hang out with her like once a week and and stop with the SMS stuff - your perception will drastically change.
 

WC2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 29, 2006
Messages
1,700
Reaction score
69
Location
New York City
flexion_ said:
Every woman is insecure - so get used to it.

Don't be so available and it will make the time you are together better. Hang out with her like once a week and and stop with the SMS stuff - your perception will drastically change.
It's true, but not every woman is the same. A girl is secure when she can live her life without questioning herself and coming to you every minute of the day. I mean sure, once in awhile they think their ass looks too big, but thats every woman. Look at your woman and tell me what you think she'll be doing in 10 years. That's a good way to gauge what you're dealing with.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Top