"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What's the mindframe to have?

iluvfemales

Don Juan
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Lately I've been very nervous around girls that I like because I start to think too much about every minute detail.
I also have been having trouble coming up with ideas for a first date. I believe the problem is that I'm not sure how much of myself I should be and where to incorporate the don juan parts. The worse part is that for some reason once I know the girl likes me (by her body lanugage and conversation) then I start to worry that I might screw things up which seems to make me get even more nervous. I know that im over analysing too prevent myself from getting hurt but logicly I know its wrong. It's the emotional part that im trying to work past.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can work past this?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Delta Male

Don Juan
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The only way to overcome your nervousness is to get out there and do it. Drop all techniques until you can talk to a girl confidently and without a hint of nervousness. This will stop you from overanalyzing. Go up to a girl and:

1. Tell her she's cute, and you want to meet her.
2. Talk about whatever comes to mind for five or ten minutes.
3. Ask for her number.

But don't you need routines, or slick verbal tactics? For now, NO. Just practice the above. Yes you will get rejected many, many times. But, after you do about a hundred sets of girls like this, you will begin to get good at it and start to get numbers consistently.

PM me later to update me on how this worked for you, or if you're interested in meeting up with guys in real life who can motivate you to approach.

-Dan
 

iluvfemales

Don Juan
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See the problem is that I never had trouble getting the girls number. Everytime I pushed myself to do it then it worked. But I feel like I've just been getting lucky. Also the point after getting the number, when I set up a date, Im not sure how aggresive I should be with her. Because I dont want to seem fake but I dont want to seem like "nice guy" either.
 
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