what's a good example of putting her in her place?

[TheFlyingMan]

I know now that when a woman gives you ****, you have to let her know it's unacceptable. Say for example, she does stuff that's rude. Say she flakes on you with some bull**** excuse 2 MINUTES before we're supposed to meet up.

What's a good thing to say without sounding like an arsehole? I tend to either let things slide too easily or go overboard.

Also, some things, some people think is rude, but I don't. For example, a chick I drove to a club, she disappeared without telling me. She went home without telling me. She said she couldn't find me (bull****, I'm a head taller then almost everyone at the club). I had to call her after running around the club looking for her when I wanted to leave, only to find that she was already home.

I thought that was OK, nothing wrong with that, but some of my boys thought she was very rude for doing so. I let it slide, but what should I have done?

 

[Fash]

It depends on the situation. How long you have known her, if you really like her.... etc...

If a girl you haven't known for a while does that, then she deserves to get the boot. She could have texted you or left a message saying she can't find you and she is going home. That would have been somewhat acceptable.

The way I deal with these situations is by turning it around on them. I would ask them in a very soft way with a smile about how they would feel if "I" had done the same to them. For example, here is something that happened recently.

I was at a house party with a girl I had just started seeing. She got talking to a friend of mine at the dinner table and it turned out that they had the same taste in vinyl and collected old ones. He then suggested that they keep in touch incase he finds any of the vinyls that she likes. So he asked for her number, and she just gave it to him, in front of me and my other friends. I acted completely cool and didn't say anything.

The next day... I just asked her:

Me: Tell me... If i came to a party at your friend's house with you, got talking to one of your friends and gave her my number..... how would you feel?
Her: I'd be upset. ofcourse!
Me: (smiling) interesting

That is all I had to say! She spent the rest of the day trying to make it up to me and explaining her self.

I hope you get what I'm trying to say. Just make them understand that their actions are wrong by asking them how they would feel if somone did the same to them.

 

[TheFlyingMan]

thanks mate!

 

[TheFlyingMan]

thanks

 

[smoke city]

when it comes to dealing with a woman you'd like to keep around a little longer, i think fash has it mostly right. i go as far as saying something like "don't apologize -- just don't do it again." A firm, but calmly delivered statement of that nature lets her know that yr keeping tabs on her behavior. and it helps to convey something very important -- that she can LOSE you if she doesn't shape up...