"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What Topics do you bring up to get her horny? Aka sexy talk

Marvin Gaye

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What do the experienced DJs here do when they bring up the topic of sex? It's pretty common knowledge that talking about kinky shyt get's a female aroused extremely quickly.

When I bring up the subject it sounds stale though. When girls bring it up, and I chime in, they couldn't be more interested and I comepletely dominate the conversation. WTF?

I saw the thread about critizing girl's performance during sex, saying they just lie there and make you do all the work or something. This of course gets them to validate themseves.


What are your specifics though guys? All I really ever do is bring up aphrodisiacs or talk about spanking or something. Double entrendres are cool too.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Razor Sharp

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FOREPLAY is what gets em revved up. Too many guys jump to the chase without realizing that getting from point A to point B is a gradual process.

First I like to talk about kissing, what works, what doesn't. Good kissers I've had, lousy ones. Some funny stories there for sure, but it gets the motor running.

I also like to recapitulate on first experiences, the excitement mixed with fear. The feeling of the world spinning around you out of existence - the fireworks. The days when you could spend a whole night just kissing a girl and that was more than enough.

I use my own anecdotes to make sure they understand how much I enjoy foreplay. And that's no lie. As someone who has studied tantra I have learned to derive supreme pleasure from the most basic intimacy. More than half of my lays have come from going back to my place just to "snuggle and nothing else". Only 3 of those girls actually just wanted to stay at first/second base that night, but on Day 2 they got smashed.

Then I like to talk about sensual massage. The areas of a woman's body that most men neglect (head, neck, stomach, back, inner thighs, etc) I talk about the parts that excite me the most, and what I do to them. A fun game at this point - I like to write them messages on their forearms, wrists and palms with my finger to see if they can decipher. I'm also well versed in some forms of chick crack and this one comes in really handy: Erogenous Zones of the Zodiac

The real trick to this kind of talk is COMFORT. You have to feel 100% non-chalant about the convo as if you were discussing the weather. Sure your tone goes down a bit, your voice gets deeper and a bit more raspy, but overall the vibe is that this is a typical topic of discussion, you have no taboos nor do you judge.

See, the true art of seduction is giving women the security to let their inner freak out. When they feel safe with you, like they can be "themselves" AND you know what turns them on - then all their incentive for resisting goes away because most of that comes from the fear of being labeled a sl*t, or being played for a fool.

Last piece of advice, don't focus on the sex talk the whole time - it sends the wrong message. Sprinkle it throughout your conversation when relevant and only dive in when she is giving up some juicy tidbits.
 

Marvin Gaye

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Razor Sharp said:
FOREPLAY is what gets em revved up. Too many guys jump to the chase without realizing that getting from point A to point B is a gradual process.

First I like to talk about kissing, what works, what doesn't. Good kissers I've had, lousy ones. Some funny stories there for sure, but it gets the motor running.

I also like to recapitulate on first experiences, the excitement mixed with fear. The feeling of the world spinning around you out of existence - the fireworks. The days when you could spend a whole night just kissing a girl and that was more than enough.

I use my own anecdotes to make sure they understand how much I enjoy foreplay. And that's no lie. As someone who has studied tantra I have learned to derive supreme pleasure from the most basic intimacy. More than half of my lays have come from going back to my place just to "snuggle and nothing else". Only 3 of those girls actually just wanted to stay at first/second base that night, but on Day 2 they got smashed.

Then I like to talk about sensual massage. The areas of a woman's body that most men neglect (head, neck, stomach, back, inner thighs, etc) I talk about the parts that excite me the most, and what I do to them. A fun game at this point - I like to write them messages on their forearms, wrists and palms with my finger to see if they can decipher. I'm also well versed in some forms of chick crack and this one comes in really handy: Erogenous Zones of the Zodiac

The real trick to this kind of talk is COMFORT. You have to feel 100% non-chalant about the convo as if you were discussing the weather. Sure your tone goes down a bit, your voice gets deeper and a bit more raspy, but overall the vibe is that this is a typical topic of discussion, you have no taboos nor do you judge.

See, the true art of seduction is giving women the security to let their inner freak out. When they feel safe with you, like they can be "themselves" AND you know what turns them on - then all their incentive for resisting goes away because most of that comes from the fear of being labeled a sl*t, or being played for a fool.

Last piece of advice, don't focus on the sex talk the whole time - it sends the wrong message. Sprinkle it throughout your conversation when relevant and only dive in when she is giving up some juicy tidbits.

Awesome advice. Thanks Razor
 

handle

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If she initiates TALKING about it, then I get descriptive... quickly.

But I generally don't talk about it, I just get her horny without my words
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Razor Sharp

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squirrels said:
You think TALKING about sex is the way to get women revved up? :rolleyes:
You gotta start somewhere, unless you are instantly sexing women as soon as you see them, in which case I tip my hat in reverence.

I find that sensual conversation gets the kettle heated and makes for less resistance later on. Women are turned on at a different pace than men. We are like light switches, they are like dials. Turn up the volume from 1 to 10 and it seems abrupt/rude, but gradually twist that knob every so often and she won't even hear herself scream if you play your cards right. The more gradual you learn to ramp things up, the wetter they get in anticipation. That means less work for you to get those panties off.

I mean sure you could caveman her right on the spot, but then (unless she's a total sl*t) you have to deal with that moment where her logical mind engages, she realizes what she is doing and gives you the old LMR blue balls.
 

handle

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I have to disagree with the notion of sensual conversation as part of "warming up" a girl. It's always worked out better for me to make physical moves rather than bringing up the topic of sex. This doesn't have to be going from a meter apart to grabbing her chest, I mean more like subtle touches, moving in closer to her, etc. You can talk about whatever you want, but let the conversation trail off into making out or whatever. Hard to describe what I'm saying, but I've never needed to actually talk about sex. You know how a lot girls say "it just kind of happened?" Just make a smooth transition and it'll "just happen".
 

Razor Sharp

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It's always worked out better for me to make physical moves rather than bringing up the topic of sex.
Most times it's the girl that will start talking about love, relationships, men. etc. In that context it's a natural transition, but I agree with this point here - to pull the sex card out of thin air can come off forced. Unless you are really good at steering conversations you should let things progress naturally.

Also worth noting, after you do this for a while you can make ANYTHING sound sexy. 90% of the game is tonality, body language and what is read "between the lines". And yes, all that talk without any touching won't get you far either (see previous post).

That said, there are plenty of instances when our first conversation about sex is after we've done the deed. There is no formula that always works for me, but I do find that having a healthy, casual attitude about sex is FUNDAMENTAL to my game, and reflecting that via conversation, posture and touch goes a long way towards getting me where I want to be.
 

handle

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Cool, I getcha. We have different styles but I see where you're coming from with that.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

BigJimbo

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Shopping. That will turn on any real girl.

Sorry, but girls just do not get into the sex talk like horny young American boys wish they did. You know all those chat rooms you guys go to? Those are guys posing as females you are chatting dirty with. Quit being sleazy and perverted. Why did I throw in the word "American". Because Americans LOVE sex talk. Much like oral sex to an American girl comes BEFORE intercourse (most non-Anglo types find that VERY odd). Romance is totally dead in America these days.

P.S. This does not apply to 35 year old women who have two eggs left.
 

Razor Sharp

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BigJimbo said:
Shopping. That will turn on any real girl.
Especially gold-diggers :)

For real though - I can't speak for women in your country, but here and all over Europe/Asia women love dirty talk just as much as we do. If you have any doubt just pluck one of those torrid novels they favor out of their hands and read a few passages. All kinds of sex happening there, but the painting of it is different. To wit:

Her Version
He had dark somber eyes, like the soul of someone lost and hidden behind tinted windows of a limousine. His skin was rough and ravaged by god knows how many perils. His thick, callous hands stroked her tenderly as they kissed and the fire within her grew, only to be quenched by the floodgates opening as he slipped a finger inside her and she reached for his throbbing, purple-headed manhood...<snip..this sh*t seriously goes on like this for pages before they even f*ck>
His Version
I took this fine piece of ass home and f*cked the sh*t out of her. She sucked my d*ck and let me do all kinds of dirty things to her. It was awesome.
Men want the money shot. Put the b*tch face down, ass up and let me bust a nut in her mouth and call it a night. Women are more interested in the process leading up to that encounter, especially the moments of anticipation before it all happens and also the feelings afterwards. The whole process their money shot.

Judging from your post you probably don't know this but it's totally possible to bring a woman very close to orgasm with words alone. I discovered this for myself recently with my current LTR - I can talk her to orgasm, there is a lot of buildup but no touching from me or her. When things have gotten really heated and I can tell she is lost in the moment I finally touch her p*ssy and she c*ms instantly. We also have a secret codeword that lets her know I'm ready for sex. It doesn't matter where we are or what's goin on, I can drop that phrase and she instantly gets moist. All it takes is a trip to a nearby bathroom/closet/utilityroom and she's ready to go. Pavlov would be proud.

Women also LOVE dirty talk in the sack. I discovered this firsthand when my first girl complained that I didn't say anything. It took time but I figured out that she and pretty much every other woman I have f*cked loves to be manhandled, treated like a wh*re and verbally degraded/dominated. You can convey this best with a few choice words whispered tenderly in her ear as you grab a fistful of her hair and use it as leverage to pound that ass.

Of course talking is not the only way to turn 'em on, or even the most effective. For example I find that doing anything new or exciting is way more foolproof. I've taken a few dates tandem jumping and that's guaranteed ass, even on a Day 1. Sometimes they have no idea where I'm taking them till we are there, other times I take them to classy swing/tango dance clubs and literally sweep them off their feet. Uncertainty, wonder, anticipation - any possible way that you can instill these emotions (spoken or not) or just LEAD as a man, will serve you well on the field.

Now BigJimbo, let's see you step up here and spit something comparable. You know, some actual life-proven advice on game to corroborate your success. That would be a welcome change from your usual repertoire of potshots against America. Surely there is more to your game than that.. or is there?

BJ: Excuse me I just saw you from across the room and wanted to tell you that America sucks!
HB: Oh.. kay
BJ: I hate America
HER: Uhh, have we met?
BJ: No, but I have met a lot of stupid, ugly Americans.
HER: ...
BJ: Seriously, I can't believe these dumb assh*les living in the US. F*CK THEM! *pounds fist on table*
HER: Allllright.. I'm gonna go over there now
BJ: You see? F*ckin Americans c*ckblockin me again! AARRRGGGHHH!!! *shakes fist at the west*

:D
 

Jariel

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Men want the money shot. Put the b*tch face down, ass up and let me bust a nut in her mouth and call it a night. Women are more interested in the process leading up to that encounter, especially the moments of anticipation before it all happens and also the feelings afterwards. The whole process their money shot.

Judging from your post you probably don't know this but it's totally possible to bring a woman very close to orgasm with words alone.
Absolutely spot on! Women have told me this many times before, it's in all sorts of sex guides and erotic fiction. Women get aroused mentally, which is why traits such as confidence, power and alike can be such a turn on for women.

I started paying attention to this more as I got older and the results spoke for themselves. I've sent erotic text messages to women and they've admitted to masturbating over them, while thinking of me. I also had a woman invite me straight over for sex after reading a sexual text message like this. I'd never so much as kissed her before, just flirted, but because I'd got her so aroused she let her guard drop and we just gave in to our instincts.
 

Mike32ct

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Razor Sharp and Jariel TOTALLY get it when it comes to sexy talk.

It is more challenging to pull off with young women because they get more self-conscious and are easily distracted. I'm working on improving my game in that area.

However, 30+ women absolutely love it. Like Jariel mentioned, I have also had some invite me over their place just from text/im s*x or phone s*x.

One "routine" I have used to good success is to play the "scary movie" angle:

Mike: What kind of movies do you like?
HB: Comedys, romantic, blah blah blah.
Mike: How about scary movies?
HB: I don't know. I don't sleep well afterwards.
Mike: But what if you watched it with the right person?
HB: Maybe.
Mike: Someone that would hold your hand during it.
HB: Yeah.
Mike: Someone to cuddle with during the scary parts.
HB: I would like that.
Mike: Then you'd feel all warm and safe as we enjoyed the movie.
HB: Mmm yeah.
Mike: Of course at some point, I might look over at you and brush your hair aside.
HB: go on...
Mike: Then lean in to kiss you softly.
HB: I like that.
Mike: Are you a good kisser?
HB: Of course.
Mike: We'll see.

Anyway I won't type forever. You can see how I started talking about movies, then cuddling, then kissing. It can easily flow to talk about foreplay and sex and get her really wet.

The trick is to pay attention to her response. If she gets uncomfortable, you will know and can change the subject. Otherwise, if you sense she is enjoying it or at least being neutral but listening, you can continue.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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