What Next?

[NewAndImproved]

Quick background...I've always been shy around girls...shy period to some extent. At its worst I had no friends...in HS 4 years ago. No need to dwell on it though. I've come a long way and it hasn't been easy. Had a short-lived relationship a while ago. A 20 and counting yr old virgin. Always had my chances. Supposedly I'm good-looking, though I know confidence and actually taking action trumps that. If you sit on your hands, you're never gonna get action. Period.

Anyway, last Sat at a party I was hanging out w/some friends when I saw this girl smile at me twice a few feet behind me while I was talking to a friend. Usually I wouldn't do anything but that night something inside me clicked. Luckily someone else I knew was talking to this girl's friend so I had an opening. We talked a bit...I have a funny game where I guess what school the girl's at and 9/10 I'm right...which I was here. Then we went to a nearby party and danced. When she waved her friend goodbye I knew I was in. We made out on the floor but rather than continue w/this (in the past I've danced too long w/a girl and the tension is lost) I just said let's get out of here. She gave a light objection "you're not gonna take advantage of me?" which in the past would've deterred me but not this time.

I've had a few girls back in my room before, but all we would do was make out. I guess my fear that my inexperience would be "found out" crippled me. I just went for it and we did everything except sex. Halfway through the night she asked if I wanted her to go or stay and I didn't say anything. Instead I climbed back into bed and she followed. The next morning she left, she said she had "fun," I got her # and that was that. She seemed to want me to say or do something else but I wasn't too sure on the etiquette.

So what next? I'm not as clueless as I seem. I know in the morning the girl probably wanted me to indicate to her that I valued her and didn't just use her. It's been a few days so I should call soon...I don't know what I want but it'd be nice to continue doing casual stuff. But how do I go from a random hookup to a casual conversation? Should we go to the cafe on campus or what?

 

[War Against Betaism]

You probably should have called her the next day. The popular vote around here is to wait a couple days, but I don't like that approach. Girls don't like it when they feel like you used them and how would they feel if you've never called them until after a few days later? The whole principle behind it is to appear busy, but it is just so artificially made it usually doesn't execute well.

It's not too late to call her again, just set up a meet time and have a date.

 

[NewAndImproved]

We hung out again. We were both going to the same party so I told her to text me when she got there. We danced and talked a little. It seemed like she wanted to go back so I'm like "I'll walk you back." She's like "I don't know you well enough for that." I immediately feigned innocence and was like "Huh?!I just wanted to walk you." She then apologized lol. We chilled another 20 minutes later at the party and then I saw some friends who wanted to chill. I acted like I was gonna go w/them and then she's like "want to come back?"

In hindsight, though, I think I screwed up next. I suggested a movie we watched part of it, "cuddling," but she fell asleep at some point. So did I. I woke up early in the AM and left. Later in the AM, Fri AM, she texts saying she had a fun time and we should hang out again. What's the problem, then? I don't want anything serious w/her now. I'm sure of it. It's too early in the semester. It feels like I'm going down the dating path when all I wanted was a hookup. How do I get it back to that?

 

[SharinganUser]

How do you get back to having a hook up with her? First ya gotta go down to the Science Department and have them transplant a set of testies for you. Then you call this girl up and invite her over to your place. You kino and escalate it until she is so rev'd up she pulls you into the bedroom. And if she doesn't, you take her hand and bring her into your room.

Right now you are treating her like your gf. DON'T DO THAT!!!!!!

Treat her like a casual hook up.



you know in Europe you just gotta be friends with a chick to hook up with her. You are not in Europe.

 

[70Deuce]

Brother, let me ask you one question.

would you pay 28 dollars for all the answers to your problems???

You know what my man.. I would. And i did. And it was the best 28 dollar investment i made this year.. Ive officially been pimped, ya dig??

Now youre next question is ok what exactly am i talking about and where do you get this magic pill?

http://www.change-yourself.com/index.html

Simple. Let the games begin brotha!

 

[DJVladdy]

Dan, with all due respect, enough.

 

[Warrior74]

Brother, let me ask you one question.

would you pay 28 dollars for all the answers to your problems???

You know what my man.. I would. And i did. And it was the best 28 dollar investment i made this year.. Ive officially been pimped, ya dig??

Now youre next question is ok what exactly am i talking about and where do you get this magic pill?

http://www.change-yourself.com/index.html

Simple. Let the games begin brotha!

wow...this is some lame ass marketing. seriously?

 

[get1]

from my experience if you don't want to go down the dating path, don't speak everyday, be busy catch up say once a week. At a party then back to yours escalate or say . it is sometimes hard to go back but in your situation I am sure its not too late. just be honest, say its early in the semester and i want to achieve this..so i don't want a gf at the moment but love hanging out. See her once a week and resist her advances in terms of seeing you more and becoming bf and gf. works for me.