"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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What does plates mean?

IHeartTrance

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I've seen you guys been using this term a lot. Ive been away for a while and just gotten back into the game. I'm sorry for being a noob but please explain.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Fireballs

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Plates = girls.

Spinning plates = Having 2, 3, even 4+ girls on the go at one time.
 

gravityeyelids

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The idea of spinning plates is important for a number of reasons. It's not simply to look like a bada$$ by having several girls that you're talking to/sleeping with at once.

It's almost a defensive move in that it fends off feelings of one-itis and desperation. When you have a number of options you become less dependent on one girl and it doesnt hit you as hard when you get rejected by a girl, because you have a couple of others you can hit up.

If you only have one girl you're chasing, you tend to become somewhat needy and dependent on the outsome of your relationship with that one girl. You end up shooting yourself in the foot because this neediness shows through and she can subconsciously tell that you're not a guy with options.

Especially if you're just starting out, spinning plates is very important. You can fake it with one girl and have some success but you're not going to gain the core confidence needed to become great with women until you see through experience that you are a man capable of having multiple options at once.

What happens when you start spinning plates is you naturally learn to NOT text girls back immediately, NOT jump on every opportunity to hang out with them, NOT to hang on their every word. You don't put up with any bullsvit or let them toy with you because you're aware that you can just bail on her and hang out with a higher quality woman.

In addition, we all know how much of a numbers game this is and how flakey women are. You could pull 8 numbers in a weekend, hit them up, get a response from maybe 6 of them, get 3 of them to agree to meeting up for a "date", and then have 2 of them flake out for various reasons. You still end up meeting up and potentially banging that one. For comparison, let's say you have only one girl that you've been really stressing over for weeks and nervous and really want to hang out with her. You invite her for coffee, but since she's your only option, you come off as needy and then when the time comes for the date, she ends up bailing because she can tell that you're not a high quality guy. Now you're pissed because you put all your eggs in one basket and you end up feeling sh!tty. (im talking about the hypothetical "you", i'm not calling you a chode or anything)

When we say to "spin more plates", typically we are saying you are becoming too obsessed with one girl and you need to get your mind off her by lining up other options. Hope this helped.
 

El Payaso

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gravityeyelids said:
The idea of spinning plates is important for a number of reasons. It's not simply to look like a bada$$ by having several girls that you're talking to/sleeping with at once.

It's almost a defensive move in that it fends off feelings of one-itis and desperation. When you have a number of options you become less dependent on one girl and it doesnt hit you as hard when you get rejected by a girl, because you have a couple of others you can hit up.

If you only have one girl you're chasing, you tend to become somewhat needy and dependent on the outsome of your relationship with that one girl. You end up shooting yourself in the foot because this neediness shows through and she can subconsciously tell that you're not a guy with options.

Especially if you're just starting out, spinning plates is very important. You can fake it with one girl and have some success but you're not going to gain the core confidence needed to become great with women until you see through experience that you are a man capable of having multiple options at once.

What happens when you start spinning plates is you naturally learn to NOT text girls back immediately, NOT jump on every opportunity to hang out with them, NOT to hang on their every word. You don't put up with any bullsvit or let them toy with you because you're aware that you can just bail on her and hang out with a higher quality woman.

In addition, we all know how much of a numbers game this is and how flakey women are. You could pull 8 numbers in a weekend, hit them up, get a response from maybe 6 of them, get 3 of them to agree to meeting up for a "date", and then have 2 of them flake out for various reasons. You still end up meeting up and potentially banging that one. For comparison, let's say you have only one girl that you've been really stressing over for weeks and nervous and really want to hang out with her. You invite her for coffee, but since she's your only option, you come off as needy and then when the time comes for the date, she ends up bailing because she can tell that you're not a high quality guy. Now you're pissed because you put all your eggs in one basket and you end up feeling sh!tty. (im talking about the hypothetical "you", i'm not calling you a chode or anything)

When we say to "spin more plates", typically we are saying you are becoming too obsessed with one girl and you need to get your mind off her by lining up other options. Hope this helped.
You can't get a better explanation anywhere else. Wow.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ovoxo

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Fireballs said:
Plates = girls.

Spinning plates = Having 2, 3, even 4+ girls on the go at one time.
Plates can also be hobbies your extremely passionate about.
 

ChemGod

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gravityeyelids said:
The idea of spinning plates is important for a number of reasons. It's not simply to look like a bada$$ by having several girls that you're talking to/sleeping with at once.

It's almost a defensive move in that it fends off feelings of one-itis and desperation. When you have a number of options you become less dependent on one girl and it doesnt hit you as hard when you get rejected by a girl, because you have a couple of others you can hit up.

If you only have one girl you're chasing, you tend to become somewhat needy and dependent on the outsome of your relationship with that one girl. You end up shooting yourself in the foot because this neediness shows through and she can subconsciously tell that you're not a guy with options.

Especially if you're just starting out, spinning plates is very important. You can fake it with one girl and have some success but you're not going to gain the core confidence needed to become great with women until you see through experience that you are a man capable of having multiple options at once.

What happens when you start spinning plates is you naturally learn to NOT text girls back immediately, NOT jump on every opportunity to hang out with them, NOT to hang on their every word. You don't put up with any bullsvit or let them toy with you because you're aware that you can just bail on her and hang out with a higher quality woman.

In addition, we all know how much of a numbers game this is and how flakey women are. You could pull 8 numbers in a weekend, hit them up, get a response from maybe 6 of them, get 3 of them to agree to meeting up for a "date", and then have 2 of them flake out for various reasons. You still end up meeting up and potentially banging that one. For comparison, let's say you have only one girl that you've been really stressing over for weeks and nervous and really want to hang out with her. You invite her for coffee, but since she's your only option, you come off as needy and then when the time comes for the date, she ends up bailing because she can tell that you're not a high quality guy. Now you're pissed because you put all your eggs in one basket and you end up feeling sh!tty. (im talking about the hypothetical "you", i'm not calling you a chode or anything)

When we say to "spin more plates", typically we are saying you are becoming too obsessed with one girl and you need to get your mind off her by lining up other options. Hope this helped.
Was wondering this myself. Great explanation, I didnt realize the importance of spinning plates until I read this.
 
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