"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
What do I do for the second date? dont want to be boring
- Thread starter Soprano
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Soprano said:
Taking her ice skating is always a good idea. The key tip is to always remember to keep it interesting and fun for you and her. I always use some of these ideas for cheap, cost-effective dates:
- Walk around a mall together, look at interesting stores = free
- Rock Climbing, fun way to build trust and its exciting = $20
- Walk around a park, bring a camera or something and make up that you need to do some project where you have to take pictures = free
- Go Karting = Depends on where you go
- Go to a museum together, this one is definitely a lot of fun especially if you have cool museums (like the Children's Museum in Indianapolis or the city museum in Saint Louis) = $10-$20
- Go see a small concert or crappy indie band, nothing too crazy so you two can talk
Depending on the level of escalation, she might also be up for just "going to your place to watch a DVD/movie". And we all know what that means. So I suggest that a lot of the time.
This!shaunuk said:
"watch a movie" is the code word for sex. Hell anyone can watch a movie alone or at the theater or with their friends. So whats so special about coming over to watch a movie? The part that comes after the movie (or in my case half way through it).
A couple of glasses of wine, eating dinner together, watching a movie, nasty monkey sex. Sounds like a great second date to me.
If she's not down for that, then maybe she's not ready yet and find something else to do.
What is it that YOU want to do? You should be striving to bring her into your world.
What is it that is masculine and physical that you can take her to do? Something that gets her out of the realm of the feminine (dinner, coffee, movie theaters). Can you go rock climbing, or even just mini golf, or go cart racing or something that involves competition and activity and fun? I once took a girl to a shooting range for a date and taught her how to shoot my gun. Then later, I taught her how to shoot my gun. :yes:
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Bobby Rio
Don Juan
or to the mall with you to help you pick out shoes or something
Pretty much always aiming to get them round my place, or at least meet in a pub or bar pretty close to my house so I can invite them back after they're a bit popped up on the drink.The reason for getting them back to your place is obvious - you're more likely to get a shag in your bedroom than in starbucks.
A decent amount of drink, then find a reason to get back to yours. . . "Hey lets go back to mine for a bit, i'll play that song on my guitar that you like" . . ."I've got some more bottles of beer back at mine".
Preferable to bypass this whole step if you feel she'll be up for just going to your place straight away.
Capodeciña
Don Juan
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