what are my odds with this new approach?

[blueline]

Over the past year and a few months, I've been going out 3 times a week almost every week. Over this time period, I've gotten a whole ton of rejections for dates after getting the number (at least over twenty), I've been on dates with several girls, I've made out with a bunch of girls, I've had sex with 6 girls, had a couple ****buddies, and I had a 4 month long exclusive relationship. The number of rejections (a rejection to me is when there just isn't that non-verbal vibe) I've gotten before even thinking about getting a number is probably in the hundreds now. It's been a pretty wild trip and I've learned a lot about women.

However, in the end, I do not feel like I've gained anything really all that great from this lifestyle. All of the attractive girls I've hooked up with have been either sluts or mentally damaged (the girl I was in a relationship with was bipolar). I've tried working "quality" girls, but it usually fails (I wouldn't be posting here right now if I had one of these, right?) and I end up getting rejected. Oftentimes these quality girls are not quite as physically attractive as the girl I dated or the ones I've hooked up with. I'm starting to think that if a girl is hot, knows it, and has some grasp of sanity/isn't a slut, she isn't going to have sex with me or enter a relationship with me. I'm aware that I'm somewhat stunted financially for a 24 y/o, but I'm about to move out of my parent's house to start a great job and begin a very lucrative master's degree at penn state. I don't think most chicks, especially college chicks, care about money as much as society would lead you to believe.

Also, I'm starting to notice that I never really get along with the girls I pickup through going out constantly and hanging out with edgy party crew. I've never been friends with any of them except one (even the girl I dated!) and all she wanted to do was use me for sex until something better came along.

I feel like I'm not going to meet anybody that's actually good for me by going out constantly like this. I mean, think about the crew that goes to bars every weekend and parties where there are typically tons of drugs. Unless he's extremely good looking, the so-called quality girls do not want to meet their future boyfriend at these things.

I just feel like I'm wasting my time with this ****. I want a meaningful relationship that has some potential to last longer than a few months. I know this is difficult to find, but my standards for a girl to have this kind of relationship with are not all that high. All she needs to be is cute (a 6.5 or 7), not be a slut, be capable of relating to me in some way, and not be mentally unstable. I don't think I'm going to meet that girl at a party or bar.

I know what to do now with girls and I know what a girl that's into me acts like. I'm not like some virgin waiting around to meet the perfect girl that's going to do all the work for him, I'll still approach girls. I just don't feel like partying anymore. I also don't feel like collecting tons and tons of numbers from random chicks in hopes to find the slutty/desperate one. It takes so much time and effort to get into all of those social circles (don't even get me started on the cold approach, that probably has an 11% likelihood of ending in sex even if you're good looking like Paul Janka). I think abandoning the party/hookup lifestyle and concentrating on myself rather than meeting some skank/crazy chick is gonna be a lot better for me.

What are the odds of meeting this kind of chick without going out constantly? Do you really have to go out to bars and parties to meet girls? I haven't had much luck outside of it. Hell, I'll still bang a slut/desperate girl if she crosses paths with me, but I'm not going to spend countless hours 2-3 nights a week trying to find her.

Until I started giving every girl I'm attracted to the vibe and got out constantly, I never got laid. There were most definitely girls that wanted to hook up with me before this period, but I didn't have the experience to know what to do. You can see why I'd be nervous about dropping the party lifestyle, though. It's the only way I've gotten laid in the past.

 

[xdreamz]

your observations are correct for the most part. i can confrim from my experience that the longer, more quality relationships come mostly to me. so it would be wise to focus on putting together a decent lifestyle for yourself. lately i've been doing a bit of some charm, gotten a lot of numbers, but i can't seem to make a committment to winning anyone over because it takes up an effort that i can't seem to conjure up at this point of my life. you have that dedication and took the effort, you saw where the road leads. so it's a matter of having the right one come to you.

 

[blueline]

Yeah, I'm finally comfortable with not going out and chasing sluts 2-3 days a week. I wanted to end this kind of lifestyle last fall after I broke up with my first girlfriend, but no matter how much I wanted to stop doing it, there was this kind of emptiness and loneliness inside of me that always compelled me to go out 2-3 nights a week to meet women. Perhaps it was this night that I was going to get lucky as they say it. It really is just luck; it's all about meeting the girl with the right combination of promiscuity, physical attraction to you, and physical attractiveness. After that, all you need to do is plant your feet and talk to her about whatever you can.

After banging a bunch of sluts and neurotic girls, I've realized that what I want to do is be in a secure, loving relationship. In the apartment that I'll be living in, there might be these massive college parties next door to me, but at the same time, I'm going to know exactly where that leads to now. Maybe you'll meet some slut looking for a banging or some broken girl using sex to keep your attention. If you partake in the drug and alcohol abuse that I have done in the past, you're definitely going to kill some brain cells on some nights regardless of the outcome with women.

Is it all worth it just to get some ass that isn't even going to stick around or that you might not even want to stick around? The answer to that question from my perspective is that it isn't.

This process of going out 2-3 nights a week and getting used by hot sluts has been so damaging to my psyche. Whenever some hot chick shows interest in me now, I mentally label her as either A.) a slut that's going to use me for sex or B.) a damaged girl not really that into me that is going to use sex to keep me around as her therapist. Fuck all of that.

The 6 girls I've had sex with in this last year fell perfectly under those categories. I've gotten the numbers of scores and scores of attractive girls, and the ones that want to have sex with me fall neatly into those categories. It has nothing to do with my game and entirely everything to do with my physical appearance. Hot sluts are no different than male players. To get a high lay count you need to drop your standards, and a real slut will **** just about anybody that remotely makes her feel anything. It says nothing about your physical attractiveness or so-called game. If you're aggressive and act slutty enough yourself (i.e. you have good game), these girls will have sex with you. Just like a girl that's getting used, you'll find yourself wondering what it would be like if the slut loved you. Like any good player, a rehearsed slut will drop you as soon as you mention a relationship.


Since I'll have no "cool friends" to care about what they think about me and the women I date, I'm probably gonna have a relationship with some girl that is less than attractive just to see what having a sane person in love with you is like. Do you know what I miss the most when a relationship ends? It's definitely partly the sex, but most of all, it's the companionship, feeling of being wanted, and affection. Fuck what everybody thinks, dating is not a competition. There are other characteristics besides physical appearance that make a good lover.


Maybe I'll change my tune once I get some clingy chick that bores me to death. Right now, I'm writing off girls that don't meet my behavioral criteria for everything besides a single humping and dumping. Since I won't be spending anymore time seeking out hot chicks that want to bang me at bars and pretty much everywhere, banging hot sluts is going to be effortless now.

It's really not difficult to get a girl that is attracted to you. What's difficult and time consuming is simply meeting one that you're also attracted to. Once you meet her, getting her is as easy riding a bike. I could've had sex with at least two or three times as many women if I dropped my physical standards. Why? What's the point?

I've had a girl have sex with me on the first date after talking to her about my depression and suicidal ideation. I've also had chicks blow me in parking lots or under stairwells that I just talked to no more than 45 minutes before. I've made out with girls at bars and parties without even getting their name or talking to them for more than 5 minutes. Getting a girl that is physically attracted to you to have sex with you is literally a joke. I can't believe people even have trouble with it. If you've done it a few times, it's going to get easier and easier to spot girls that are physically attracted to you. If they're not physically attracted to you, it's like trying to use the wrong key to open a lock; anything you do via so-called game is not going to work.

Game only exists as a way of manufacturing conversation for long enough to get some girl that is physically attracted to you to feel comfortable enough with you to have sex with you. Keyword here: manufacturing. This is why picking up sluts feels so pointless.

Case in point: Tonight I went out to the bar with my shy friend that I think has only had any remotely sexual experience with one girl. For some bizarre reason (my friend is physically repulsive), a total babe starts hitting on him (she could probably notice that he was vulnerable and she was wasted) and he is like a deer in the headlights. He keeps saying these witty things, but he doesn't have the confidence to start getting physical with the girl. Before she leaves, she invites him to an after party (this is like a straight up proposition for sex). I'm talking to her friend and I can tell the vibe is in the air, but then she tells me she's never been to college and is a culinary student. She was looking all innocent and completely ended her attempts to **** block her friend once I started talking to her.

Now, personally, I have a ton of respect for the trades and see them as more worthwhile and productive work than most office jobs. However, I have nothing in common with such a person since I'm going to be a graduate student this fall. Outside of some menial labor, I have spent my entire life doing academia. While she was somewhat attractive, she wasn't attractive enough to manufacture a real conversation with (i.e. game my way into her pants). This is a situation in which having better game and the ability to converse with all sorts of people would've been helpful. It's not something you can get better at by reading about it, you just need to talk to a ton of strangers.

I don't know what I want this post to be really, but there are so many god damn misconceptions in this community that I'm sick of it.