Was there something wrong i did?

[solo1]

The first time i had invited her to eat with me after our class, she gave a reasonable excuse and we exchanged numbers, she seemed enthusiastic to get mine.

Technically the last time we parted, all was going well, however i found out she has a bf but i kept my cool.

Today however...not so good. She came into class and sat in my row. However today she wore makeup!, usually she doesnt.
I said hi when i saw her. However since it's a computer class, i didnt really make an effort to talk to her. Every time i walked pass her i didnt say anything to her nor did she me. However whenever i look in her direction, i notice she's playing iwth her hair (or waving it back). And every once in awhile she looks at me from the side of her eye, (i suppose to check if im checking her out)

So at the end of class i went over and started chatting and walked together to our next class. Along the way i told her there was something different about her, she was blushing/smiling and stretched out her arm saying "what, what's different?" (it was her makeup but i dindt acknowledge it). i told her she looked nice today. (dumb response i know, i shouldve played off some C&F) Her response? no clue wtf she said, guess she was taken by surprise and mumbled something.

So we get to class and her friends are there, so she goes over to them and sits with them (as she usually does). 2 hrs later, class ends, everyone's packing up. I go over to her and say:

Hey im going across the street to get some food to eat, you wanna come?
her: where?
me: Dunkin donuts ( i notice she likes to go there for coffee)
her: sorry i cant.
me: alright, well see you later.
her: ok! seee you.....thurs!

If this were under a normal situation, i would call her up and set a date. However, we have conflicting schedules, so the only time i figure is weekend nights we can go out. Unfortunately my invite is last minute (once again), but she didnt give me a reason why she couldnt...

So i dont know where it went wrong, or if im just analyzing too much or if she respects her bf that much. too many factors at play here...her IL in me seems pretty high aside from today's rejection. If anyone knows what went wrong tell me.....

 

[tmpgstx]

It's called the *i love my boyfriend and he's a jerk factor*. When she's not getting attention from him, she starts showing MORE interest in you. When she is getting confirmation from him, she starts showing LESS interest in you. He dictates how much interest she shows in you. You're not her number one, he is.

She sounds like the type that is formally refererred to as an AW, am i right? Flirty with guys she finds attractive, but has a boyfriend who treats her crappy?

 

[solo1]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
It's called the *i love my boyfriend and he's a jerk factor*. When she's not getting attention from him, she starts showing MORE interest in you. When she is getting confirmation from him, she starts showing LESS interest in you. He dictates how much interest she shows in you. You're not her number one, he is.

She sounds like the type that is formally refererred to as an AW, am i right? Flirty with guys she finds attractive, but has a boyfriend who treats her crappy?

she's not an AW. Actually she has a pretty great personality. before today, our last time together (heading home after class), the feeling was like we were old friends and rapport was great. And our interest in each other is equally shared as we ask the same amount of questions to each other.

Technically she lives iwth her bf & his parents...im betting she's getting sick of them.

What i think is it was my aloofness in class, and she thought i was fvcking around with head. And my comment on her 'looking nice', which looking back at it was sappy and plain.

If i would be able to set up a proper date (not last minute invites), where she could give me a counter offer. i could truly see if she actually wants to date me.

However, regardless i think ill just next her. i have no reason to make an extra effort to chase a girl who's already taken, when there are single girls out there...
My friend's best LTR, is actually someone's gf he stole...perhaps it isnt worth the effort?

 

[tmpgstx]

Well .. put it this way. If she is a *good* girl and he's giving her deep penetration every other night - then that *means* something to her and she'll stay close to him so long as he does treat her good.

It sounds like she does like you but not enough to leave her boyfriend for.

She first needs to move out and get a place of her own before *that* can even become a remote reality.

Generally, it's not good to chase a girl who has a bf unless she's more mature and knows more what she wants when it comes along.

 

[solo1]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
Well .. put it this way. If she is a *good* girl and he's giving her deep penetration every other night - then that *means* something to her and she'll stay close to him so long as he does treat her good.

It sounds like she does like you but not enough to leave her boyfriend for.

She first needs to move out and get a place of her own before *that* can even become a remote reality.

Generally, it's not good to chase a girl who has a bf unless she's more mature and knows more what she wants when it comes along.

Yea thats what im thinking too. Her living situation is good (probably doesnt pay rent), and i doubt she would want anything to ruin that aspect. Truth is im not looking for LTR w/her (not with anyone atm). But thanks for the reminder, other than high IL and good rapport, this isnt reason enough for me to exert more of an effort to chase her. if she really wants to be with me, ill let her chase me.

As for maturity, im certian she's a few yrs older than me.
of course she doenst like me enough, classes only started a couple weeks ago. Regardless there are other great girls on campus.

And today i've come to the realization that cold approaches are so easy to do. Make EC, SMILE, go over and introduce, start convo, # close, leave.