Very very sheltered girl.. hhmmmm...

[Nameless]

I've currently got my eye on this girl who is/has been very 'sheltered' all her life.

Only met her in person on a couple of occasions but have gotten the ball roling through emails.

As we should all know - try to get to meet them in person asap and dont turn it into a pen-pal thing - I know that.

The thing is that she is very nervous and afraid to get intimate and has suggested (email) that we should get together as friends first as she hardly knows me, and would like to get to know me better as friends first and see where it develops from there.

This would normally set off alarm bells in my head as soon as I read the dreaded 'friendship', but under these circumstances and her outlook/experience/nature, I think this may still be OK.

questions:

* How do you think I should reply to this email in order to get to see her in person under the guise of 'friends', without falling into the dreaded friendship trap?

* Have you had any experience with the very timid/sheltered girls and how did you do things differently to get them to open up?

 

[Adrian]

fvck that. Her being sheltered means nothing. she should still respond well if you have tight game. The only advice I can give you is PLAY IT COOL and just show her that you're a fun guy to be around. Since you two don't know each other well enough you have to establish RAPPORT between the two of you. Once you have her feeling comfortable around you (make her feel secure) and you're able to get her laughing, touchy, very talkative, wanting to initiate contact with you etc. then you pretty much have her on lock. Show her by your actions that you're interested in more than just a "friendship" type of relation. Just do your part and play it cool.

 

[Adrian]

btw. In the email just reply in a manner that suggests to her that you're very agreeing in her terms. That would show her that you're not being a pushover. Keep it short, simple and have a little nice "take care" or "be safe" at the end. As far as her opening up..... Shy girls are pretty confusing. But thats no big deal. Like I said before. Show her a fun time, play things cool but most of all establish rapport. Thats very important. Too much to explain. I believe there is something solely on that topic in the DJ bible.

 

[Nameless]

Thanks for the reply.

Ive got my game down quite well so there is no concern there.

Its just that Im used to working with less-shy and more open borderline aggressive females lol...

so Im still testing the waters with the very shy ones.

Interesting points - I was thinking the same for both the email and the interaction.

Any other suggestions or pointers - both good and bad things from past experiences you guys have had with the very shy types?

 

[strong like bull]

The only advice I can give you is PLAY IT COOL and just show her that you're a fun guy to be around. Since you two don't know each other well enough you have to establish RAPPORT between the two of you. Once you have her feeling comfortable around you (make her feel secure) and you're able to get her laughing, touchy, very talkative, wanting to initiate contact with you etc. then you pretty much have her on lock.

agreed.

ive dated sheltered, daddies little princess types before. most of em declare their ethics, their morals, their class... but deep down, they had the same passionate and sexual drives that every other girl does. they secretly wanted to get railed just as hard as the blonde cheerleader bimbo. imo the biggest mistake would be to try hold her hand and pamper her through the dating process. as adrian stated, play it cool but dont take it too slow. you might not progress as fast as with other girls.. but stay firm and steady; keep leading her. one thing i will say tho as far as her shyness; it may be a good idea to tone down or eliminate c&f / neghits. if she really is shy, and really does have more self-image/insecurity issues than the average girl, being too abrasive and negative might really hurt her. i know sometimes its effective to poke fun at girls, but dont crush her.

aside from that, get you guys out doing something together. no more emails. call her up and invite her to do something fun with you. something where the two of you can get excited together, get the blood pumping, be exhilerated. my two favorite ideas for that have always been ice skating and hiking. it gets you all worked up and sweaty, shows her youre an active guy and its simply a lot of fun. at least to me it is; if its not your cup of tea, dont force it. dont put yourself in an awkward situation where you have to fake yourself; but you get the idea im sure:

something fun and exciting.

-SLB