Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Urgent Advice Needed

§NøØÞ¥™

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Hello everybody, I need some advice on how to get a woman I like...here's the story:

She is an University classmate so I see her almost everyday and of of her best friends is also a friends of mine. One day this guy posted on his blog a picture of her, him and another guy working on some designs. I posted a comment telling how perfect and special and so on she was to me. Well, a few days later this friend tells me she saw that message, gave me her MSN so I began talking to her...she thanked me for that message telling me she felt pretty good reading it.

Some weeks ago we all met on a party so was my opportunity to get to know her better. We danced, talked alot, had lots of fun. I didn't want to make my move that time because she's a single mother, she's got a boyfriend (her kid's dad) and I wanna be sure of my feeling before telling her anything.

Last Tuesday checking my blog's log I found out she was reading my posts. That same day I wrote how much I liked her and how much I wanted to be with her, that I felt she was that special girl for the rest of my life, and so on.

Now she knows all what I feel for her, she knows I'm in love with her. She hasn't rejected me, we still chat everyday on MSN and at the University too...She has told me she want us to be friends, she already has a boyfriend bla blah blaj but I know she has some interest in me. Her friends have told me her actual b/f is a complete as*hole, that the relationship is not good at all, sex is bad, but she strongly believes in family and will do anything to keep her family the way it is now though she knows how bad things are.

What am I supposed to do?, I really like this girl and I know i can make her the happiest girl on Earth. Now that she know's everything I don't know if I should press a bit more or maybe step back for a while...it's a pretty difficult situation.

Thanks in advance for the feedback,
Regards

Snoopy
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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MindOverMatter

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Listen, she said she wants to be friends and that she has a boyfriend. There is no advice, you're finished. And you know what you did wrong. What were you thinking?

There is nothing you can do. Mark this up as a loss, learn from your mistakes, and move on and approach other girls. Read the DJ Bible (http://sucs.org/~nicholas/djb/index.php), educate yourself in regards to women, because frm what you wrote, you are still very inexperianced. Then start the bootcamp like all these other newcomers.

You don't know this now, but this rejection and the fact you found this website is the best thing that has happened to you. Good luck.
 

p1aya

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I agree with MindOverMatter.

Rule #1: stay AWAY from single mothers!!!!
In your case, she's not even single!

Rule #2: Friend means FRIEND!

Rule #3: Don't fall in love with someone who doesn't love you back!

My point is that you should forget the chick, and go out and look around. You'll be surprised by the number of HOT single chix out there, especially in university.
 

JackTheDog

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One thing no one mentioned is that you can't help the way you feel. You can't really be "in love" with her (because there is not nor has ever been a relationship with her), but you can be in love with your perception of her......and it's going to take time to get over her.

She chose her boyfriend, so if he's an as*hole and she allows it, isn't that her OWN fault? It's not your job to "save" her from something she thinks is perfectly acceptable.

Since you do have mutual friends, you don't want to be outright rude to her or avoid your friends and situations where she might be present. There is nothing that says you have to be her friend, but she IS in your group of acquaintances now, so you have to find a way to deal with it. Perhaps taking a date to the parties once in a while?

In any case, you have every right to feel bad for what might have been, but don't let it color your entire outlook on love/relationships. Have an ACTUAL relationship before you become too jaded to deal with women.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Don Juanabbe

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Originally posted by §NøØÞ¥™
he is an University classmate so I see her almost everyday and of of her best friends is also a friends of mine. One day this guy posted on his blog a picture of her, him and another guy working on some designs. I posted a comment telling how perfect and special and so on she was to me. Well, a few days later this friend tells me she saw that message, gave me her MSN so I began talking to her...she thanked me for that message telling me she felt pretty good reading it.

Some weeks ago we all met on a party so was my opportunity to get to know her better. We danced, talked alot, had lots of fun. I didn't want to make my move that time because she's a single mother, she's got a boyfriend (her kid's dad) and I wanna be sure of my feeling before telling her anything.

Last Tuesday checking my blog's log I found out she was reading my posts. That same day I wrote how much I liked her and how much I wanted to be with her, that I felt she was that special girl for the rest of my life, and so on
We really need to get a smilie that projectile vomits on this message board. :eek:
 

§NøØÞ¥™

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Re: Re: Urgent Advice Needed

Originally posted by Don Juanabbe
We really need to get a smilie that projectile vomits on this message board. :eek:

Yeah, it's hard to get back on the real world after a 5 years relationship.
 
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