You read a lot about nice guy's finishing last. I know when I decided to get this part of life together and started reading lots of books on being a man and David D's ebook. I learned a lot about women and realized the mistakes I've been making and I have done quite a bit to improve my game. I'm not needy, I don't call girls that often in the beginning and I stay relaxed on dates and try to lead the conversation. I'm also talking to girls more in person and asking them out oppose to just sticking to online dating as did before. Even though i've tightned my game. I'm still not getting the responses from women I"m wanting. You would think that asking girls out and planning dates and everything that men are suppose to do would in itself provide a better response. I dont' know if my expectations are out of wack or not. I do know that flirting and making girls laugh isn't my strong point and I'm trying to find ways to improve that. I'm not a big guy, 5'8 165lbs and I still question if what they say about size matters. At times I still feel like the smaller has it the hardest with women.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Unsure about some things
- Thread starter Hammer79
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
zekko
Master Don Juan
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Probably. If you read the advertisements from the pickup gurus they make it sound like reading a few pages from their book can turn you into a rockstar overnight. Or learn this one little secret and women will be approaching you in droves. It's all BS. Even the top PUAs get their share of rejections and will tell you it's a numbers game.
There are helpful tips, especially for someone who is very inexperienced to begin with. But there is no "magic bullet". Sounds like you are improving and are on the right track. That's all you can expect, really. Stay on the road you're on and you'll get somewhere. It may not be exactly where you expected to be, but you'll be somewhere.
It doesn't sound like you are so small that it would hold you back. You want to be fit and in good shape. I know what you mean though. I'm an average sized guy. I've noticed that the guys who are tall, big boned, and in shape, the biggest guys (without being fat) will probably get the most natural attention from women. And since they are so used to getting it, they're very comfortable with it, "comfortable in their own skin" as they say.
They carry themselves dominantly because they ARE the alpha guys. Not the alpha guys you find on this forum who have changed their personalities, but the true alpha guys who would have beat up everyone else back in cavemen days. But you don't have to be that guy to have success with women, so don't give in to self limiting thinking. I've seen plenty of guys your size who are good with women. They just have to rely a little more on personality than the bigger dudes.
Dear OP,
the game emphasis should on so called inner game aka having your shyt seriously together.
However, girls these days are too distracted (orbiters, TV, Face book, shopping, bitter gfs, bs career dreams) and their expectations are really high and on top of that they are trying to have control like crazy-it is very tricky because ones they have it or think they have it(!) they loose interest in you.
So to make good first impression and maintain it you have to be really TOUGH.
I'm 6"4 and not bad looking, girls react to me really well (of course I don't know what they really think of me but I'm beyond caring about stuff like that). And I tell any good looking guy...women complimenting your looks does not guarantee you an action.
However in order to get second dates I must have zero insecurity, neediness, desperation and react well resp. do not react to their attempts to assert control.
I repeat again....ZERO. You have to be TOUGH as FVCK. And initiate everything....don't wait for IOIs, approval, nothing. You have to be assertive like a tiger with Indian peasant.
the game emphasis should on so called inner game aka having your shyt seriously together.
However, girls these days are too distracted (orbiters, TV, Face book, shopping, bitter gfs, bs career dreams) and their expectations are really high and on top of that they are trying to have control like crazy-it is very tricky because ones they have it or think they have it(!) they loose interest in you.
So to make good first impression and maintain it you have to be really TOUGH.
I'm 6"4 and not bad looking, girls react to me really well (of course I don't know what they really think of me but I'm beyond caring about stuff like that). And I tell any good looking guy...women complimenting your looks does not guarantee you an action.
However in order to get second dates I must have zero insecurity, neediness, desperation and react well resp. do not react to their attempts to assert control.
I repeat again....ZERO. You have to be TOUGH as FVCK. And initiate everything....don't wait for IOIs, approval, nothing. You have to be assertive like a tiger with Indian peasant.