Twisting the word nice

[JWB]

Twisting the word nice has gotten so bad that guys are petrified of being called nice. Now if a guy buys her flowers, it's automatically assumed that he's just doing it to get in her pants. If a guy asks her what type of food she would like for dinner, he's branded a weak beta for not imposing his will on her, and is trying to get in her pants. If a guy dares holds something of hers while she goes to the bathroom he's the wimpiest wimp. If a guy is usually nice but one day he gets into even a small argument with his girlfriend, he is a conniving and evil bastard.


How did the definition of nice get so twisted? Mainly by charming aggressive or abusive guys misdefining nice for their own benefit, including poaching girlfriends with their lies.


The inevitable result of this? Everyone has bought into nice is a horrible thing. Of course when a guy has gotten rejected for like 200th time in a row his niceness goes away and he becomes bitter and angry. Guys are human and not perfect, even nice ones. The charming aggressive or abusive guy then proceeds to further demonize guys for being nice.


Don't think any of this can be changed. It is what it is.

 

[MillionBillionaire]

I used to be called "nice" ALL the F@@@@ng time. When I found out that it was bad I started to get really annoyed whenever someone would say "your a nice guy."

Now people tell me I am "Charismatic" and "Persistent."

Never be called nice. I would love to be called an "azzh0le" next.

 

[zekko]

Never be called nice. I would love to be called an "azzh0le" next.

I've been called jerk, @sshole, nice, and all sorts of other things by females. It doesn't really matter, it all can be positive or negative, depending on how they mean it.

The OP is right, the meaning of the word has been twisted. I think mainly by PUA gurus looking to sell product.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

I've been called creepy by gf & still had sex with her after the fact? Ok

What I hated the most was being called "perfect" ohh hell no. I don't know why that always made me cringe.

Awesome dater but also the an a**hole. Another good 1, both me and my dog are a**holes. (My dog can be a d*ck, he's a little territorial.)

When you are an a**hole it just means you wouldn't put up with their sh*t and their manipulation tatics didn't work out in their favor. When you are TOO nice it is viewed as a manipulation tatic, there's no challenge. Woman want nice but also want a challenge.

Poon King said it best:
OP.. this is a perfect example of how people love a*sholes.

We always want what we can't have.. even if the thing we can't have is worthless. This should explain everything (taken from an old thread I started):

What creates emotional attachment in humans? In short.. stress and uncertainty.

BRIFFAULT’S LAW:
http://www.stickmanweekly.com/ReadersSubmissions2009/reader5546.htm

 

[Igetit!]

The OP is right, the meaning of the word has been twisted. I think mainly by PUA gurus looking to sell product.

Well personally,I think the word has been twisted by WOMEN.

So many,MANY guys have heard that word,then been rejected right after hearing it (including myself),that psychologically speaking...."nice" and being rejected go hand in hand. It's like when you get rejected,you think it was because you were "too nice",then when you hear the word nice out of a woman,you immediately think of rejection.


I remember one time....a LOOOOOOOONG time ago,I had date with this one chick. We went out,date went so so,then when I took her back to her car,I asked her if she'd like to go out again....

The first words out of her mouth were,"I think you're a great guy".

Right when she said that,on the inside I said to myself,"OHHHHH SH1T..."....cause I knew what was coming next.


Another word chicks have twisted and tainted is "friend". Right when a guy hears that word out of a woman he's trying to date,he knows it's over with. I've also seen women on dating forums confused by a man's reaction to that word. Like a chick will say,"I want to be friends first".....or "start off as friends".

In that situation,the word "friend".......it's NOT a rejection. I know that. But a lot of guys will hear the word,then AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME "friendzone"/rejection,then freak out. Then the lady is sitting there scratching her head wondering what got into the guy.


The reason "friend" is tainted is cause a woman will use it to reject a guy after she's discovered she has no attraction to him.......but will use the SAME WORD when she first meets a guy to keep him at bay until she discovers if she likes him or not.

 

[zekko]

Well personally,I think the word has been twisted by WOMEN.

That's what PUAs claim. Women will say "You are a nice guy, BUT..." or "You are a great guy, BUT...". They're just trying to cushion the blow by giving you a weak compliment. Sort of like saying "You'll make a great boyfriend to someone someday".

But I still think it is men who twisted the word nice. Because butthurt men started saying "Nice guys finish last" or "I'm nice, she should have been attracted to me, but she liked that JERK". But "nice" is not an attraction factor. There's nothing wrong with being nice, but it doesn't make you sexy. Being nice does not entitle you to the girl. I believe it is neutral, it doesn't help you or hurt you.

Once she's already attracted to you, it might help you if she has filters. "He's so nice, he likes dogs. I like men who like dogs". But she has to be attracted to you first.