please provide some suggestions
Here is some thoughts about life and dating that I have learned to be true. Take it for what its worth you may not get it right away it took me 27 years but it’s the best advice I can give. Try it before you disregard it.
These things not politically correct but based on things I see everyday. It makes a lot more sense than the crap popular television and other media put forth. Read the book I bought you, its not a “how to” guide, but it will show you a person using a different manner of thinking and it makes sense.
Let me start off with a few thoughts so that what I say isn’t coming out of the blue. The first thing I realized and I didn’t realize it until I was way too old is that I had been lied to my whole life about girls. Conventional wisdom is that they are some thing different than the scum that is men, this is not true.
Conventional wisdom 1) girls want to date a gentleman.
Everyday reality 1) girls date jerks that treat them poorly
Conventional wisdom 2) girls like to be pursued.
Everyday reality 2) They don’t return your phone calls and you end up being labeled a stocker.
Conventional wisdom 3) girls want you to talk for hours on the “ about how their day was”
Everyday reality 3) you talk on the phone for hours everyday all week and the next thing you know you’re a good friend (which is the last thing you want).
Conventional wisdom 4) girls don’t want sex
Everyday reality 4) look at any women’s magazine there are more articles about sex than playboy.
Conventional wisdom 5) girls are now equal partners in dating, you should find out where they want to go when they can make it, and get the "go ahead" before you make your move.
Everyday reality 5) when you ask, they don’t know. When you constantly check in you end up as their friend.
Here are some things I have learned, and trust me I am still a novice (as are most men of all ages).
1) Treat any girl you are just starting to date in the same way you would treat a new buddy.
a. Call with a purpose, to set up a specific time and a place that you would like to hang out. Then GET OFF THE PHONE. You just met her she is one of a million girls out there, why would you spill you soul.
b. Don’t ask… TELL, this is were you want to hang out, This is when, if she can’t make it then get off the phone wait a day or so and provide another time. Don’t let if be perceived that you are willing to rearrange you entire schedule for her, it comes across as needy.
c. Think about it would you ever call a friend that you just met a couple of weeks ago to ask him how his day went or, because you want to vent about yours? No, those are the kind of things you call your old buddy to talk about.
2) Be the do’re not the follower.
a. We all have had guys that for whatever reason wanted to be our friends, they would constantly throw out ideas as to when you should hang out, they bore you with their lives boring details and they follow you around like a lost puppy. Basically creep you out. Don’t be that guy to some girl you just met.
b. Instead be a do’re go to fun parties and see if she wants to come along. Lead her to the dance floor if you can tell she likes a song (don’t ask). Tell her that you are headed to this great bar and invite her along. Don’t ask her where she wants to go, not early on anyway. If your in the bar and you run into one of those times when for no apparent reason your body is telling you to kiss her (and you’ll know it when it happens ) kiss her, don’t ask. If she doesn’t want to she will pull away, and that is not the end of the world. On a side note, make note of where she likes to hang out or what she likes to do and then do it when pick the time.
c. You and I are attracted to women based on looks initially. There are a boatload of cool girls that we would love to date if we were attracted to them but we’re not. There are most likely a lot of the same girls that we would find attractive if they lost weight dressed better wore makeup etc. My theory is that most girls want the guy that can provide for them, but not in the cars, good job, captain of the football team way. The way that you and I logically look at life. Instead they want to guy who in a given social situation dominates all others, the alpha males. This guy stands up strait sticks his chest out, keeps his chin up and doesn’t duck from eye contact (this is a key point. If you are at a bar and a girl happens to look you in the eye make her look away first, then look away yourself). This alpha male guy doesn’t mumble when he talks to a woman, he doesn’t need a gimmick. Remember this is a reaction based on evolution not society in the same way big boobs and a nice butt are programmed into our heads as desirable. Just as the frumpy girl can dress better, and make you attracted to her. You can act like an alpha male and make her attracted to you.
d. Remember society tells girls that if they are aggressive or ask for what they want they are a slut. So when something about her tells you she wants to be kissed procede as if you discussed it. She’ll pull away if it’s not the case (and she won’t think any less of you for trying, on the contrary, if you don’t she definitely will think your less of a man). I buddy once told me if you pull a girls pance down for her it feels romantic. If she pulls them off herself she feels like a slut.
3) Some final thoughts
a. Practice makes perfect find a buddy at the base work together with the goal of getting numbers, making out and having sex. Bounce ideas off one another.
b. Confidence is key, you weren’t raised to be the alpha male, to walk into the middle of a group and girls and be comfortable as the center of attention. Here’s a secret, no on was. Fake it till you make it. And practice makes perfect, it also breads confidence.
c. Finally, understand that you have value. You have every right and indeed owe it to yourself to meet lots of different women until you find the one that is right. Don’t go from relationship to relationship. Date a number of women at once and do it until you figure out what you are looking for. There is no one woman out there for you there are most likely thousands that you could settle down with and be happy. You owe yourself enough dates and enough girlfriends so that you can identify what you are looking for and then go after it.
d. Call me if you have questions read the book
Good Luck
Here is some thoughts about life and dating that I have learned to be true. Take it for what its worth you may not get it right away it took me 27 years but it’s the best advice I can give. Try it before you disregard it.
These things not politically correct but based on things I see everyday. It makes a lot more sense than the crap popular television and other media put forth. Read the book I bought you, its not a “how to” guide, but it will show you a person using a different manner of thinking and it makes sense.
Let me start off with a few thoughts so that what I say isn’t coming out of the blue. The first thing I realized and I didn’t realize it until I was way too old is that I had been lied to my whole life about girls. Conventional wisdom is that they are some thing different than the scum that is men, this is not true.
Conventional wisdom 1) girls want to date a gentleman.
Everyday reality 1) girls date jerks that treat them poorly
Conventional wisdom 2) girls like to be pursued.
Everyday reality 2) They don’t return your phone calls and you end up being labeled a stocker.
Conventional wisdom 3) girls want you to talk for hours on the “ about how their day was”
Everyday reality 3) you talk on the phone for hours everyday all week and the next thing you know you’re a good friend (which is the last thing you want).
Conventional wisdom 4) girls don’t want sex
Everyday reality 4) look at any women’s magazine there are more articles about sex than playboy.
Conventional wisdom 5) girls are now equal partners in dating, you should find out where they want to go when they can make it, and get the "go ahead" before you make your move.
Everyday reality 5) when you ask, they don’t know. When you constantly check in you end up as their friend.
Here are some things I have learned, and trust me I am still a novice (as are most men of all ages).
1) Treat any girl you are just starting to date in the same way you would treat a new buddy.
a. Call with a purpose, to set up a specific time and a place that you would like to hang out. Then GET OFF THE PHONE. You just met her she is one of a million girls out there, why would you spill you soul.
b. Don’t ask… TELL, this is were you want to hang out, This is when, if she can’t make it then get off the phone wait a day or so and provide another time. Don’t let if be perceived that you are willing to rearrange you entire schedule for her, it comes across as needy.
c. Think about it would you ever call a friend that you just met a couple of weeks ago to ask him how his day went or, because you want to vent about yours? No, those are the kind of things you call your old buddy to talk about.
2) Be the do’re not the follower.
a. We all have had guys that for whatever reason wanted to be our friends, they would constantly throw out ideas as to when you should hang out, they bore you with their lives boring details and they follow you around like a lost puppy. Basically creep you out. Don’t be that guy to some girl you just met.
b. Instead be a do’re go to fun parties and see if she wants to come along. Lead her to the dance floor if you can tell she likes a song (don’t ask). Tell her that you are headed to this great bar and invite her along. Don’t ask her where she wants to go, not early on anyway. If your in the bar and you run into one of those times when for no apparent reason your body is telling you to kiss her (and you’ll know it when it happens ) kiss her, don’t ask. If she doesn’t want to she will pull away, and that is not the end of the world. On a side note, make note of where she likes to hang out or what she likes to do and then do it when pick the time.
c. You and I are attracted to women based on looks initially. There are a boatload of cool girls that we would love to date if we were attracted to them but we’re not. There are most likely a lot of the same girls that we would find attractive if they lost weight dressed better wore makeup etc. My theory is that most girls want the guy that can provide for them, but not in the cars, good job, captain of the football team way. The way that you and I logically look at life. Instead they want to guy who in a given social situation dominates all others, the alpha males. This guy stands up strait sticks his chest out, keeps his chin up and doesn’t duck from eye contact (this is a key point. If you are at a bar and a girl happens to look you in the eye make her look away first, then look away yourself). This alpha male guy doesn’t mumble when he talks to a woman, he doesn’t need a gimmick. Remember this is a reaction based on evolution not society in the same way big boobs and a nice butt are programmed into our heads as desirable. Just as the frumpy girl can dress better, and make you attracted to her. You can act like an alpha male and make her attracted to you.
d. Remember society tells girls that if they are aggressive or ask for what they want they are a slut. So when something about her tells you she wants to be kissed procede as if you discussed it. She’ll pull away if it’s not the case (and she won’t think any less of you for trying, on the contrary, if you don’t she definitely will think your less of a man). I buddy once told me if you pull a girls pance down for her it feels romantic. If she pulls them off herself she feels like a slut.
3) Some final thoughts
a. Practice makes perfect find a buddy at the base work together with the goal of getting numbers, making out and having sex. Bounce ideas off one another.
b. Confidence is key, you weren’t raised to be the alpha male, to walk into the middle of a group and girls and be comfortable as the center of attention. Here’s a secret, no on was. Fake it till you make it. And practice makes perfect, it also breads confidence.
c. Finally, understand that you have value. You have every right and indeed owe it to yourself to meet lots of different women until you find the one that is right. Don’t go from relationship to relationship. Date a number of women at once and do it until you figure out what you are looking for. There is no one woman out there for you there are most likely thousands that you could settle down with and be happy. You owe yourself enough dates and enough girlfriends so that you can identify what you are looking for and then go after it.
d. Call me if you have questions read the book
Good Luck
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