Trouble with my mum.... could you guys please help me?

[narcissist]

I have a predicament.

I am trying to save money for when I am older so I am not a poor sonofab1tch. For me to save money I have to stay home more than usual. When I am home I am in the presence of my mum. I live with her. She is relentlessly cramping my style. This makes me want to go out and get as far away as possible from her. And if I go out I will spend money.

A little background on my mum:

She has bi-polar disorder (actually taking meds for it).

She is always looking for reasons to fvck with me. Always calling me out on things that are so minute. Always looking for something to talk sh1t to me about. Even though I am a fantastic son(not an understatement). I dont do drugs, Im not negative, I do really good in school, I work out, I save my money, I clean up after myself, I keep the house clean, My room clean, I dont drink, I motivate her, I dont argue, I dont fight etc, etc.

The only problem I think I bring to the household is my OCD. I constantly have to have things a certain way. its not THAT bad. Like I just have to have things clean and minimal (which I dont think is even a bad thing). But she constantly fvcks with that, and its painful.

On one hand I want to save my money, so I can bounce the fck outta here, but on the other hand shes fvcking with my mentality, and I want to leave asap and go out constantly, but that would require spending money, and lots of it.

What should I do? Any advice with how I should handle this situation?


I have already enacted the whole "when Im in the house I have headphones in" so she cant really talk to me. But that gets old quick.

 

[FairShake]

Surely you have friends with their own places to hang at.

You can get a girl with her own place and hang there. Kinda pathetic but necessary.

Get a bike or take long walks/hike. These are cheap and they take up a lot of time. Take a book on tape with you. When I was growing up and my parents were on drugs I would get on the bus or train and ride it all night with my student fare. I would come back when they were asleep or out partying.

I don't know where you are but I grew up in Philadelphia. There were a ton of things going on downtown for cheap. And the people watching was always free. Pays off being a poor kid down the road.

 

[logicallefty]

This is not uncommon these days, with so many mom's especially ones in their 30s and 40s that are, well, no more mature and mentally sound than your average 13 year old.

You have to get out of there or she will take you down. Find a friend or friends to move in with, or get a nice van to live in like this guy did:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nat...free-duke-master-living-van-article-1.1370463


When I was in college I lived at home but tangled quite a bit with my stepdad. He wasn't bi polar or anything but he was just negative about everything and it wore me down. I shacked up at my GF's parent's house as much as possible to get away from him.

 

[ArcBound]

TBH I use "game" or charm on my mother as well. She used to be very antagonistic towards me as well. But I found that treating her in the way we advise people to treat girls our own age tends to work. Don't take all things seriously, agree and amplify, joke about a lot of things, even being cheeky with her.

Like that, a lot of her animosity and supposed mental deficiencies evaporated and went away..

But your mom actually has the disease so I'm not sure. I try my best to be bullet proof to criticism and negative, and be positive if they are willing to join in on the positivity.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Your telling me. The meanest things ever said (and done) to me were from my mom. But about 3 years ago, I became impervious to whatever she said and I don't know why but I would start laughing hysterically like a crazy person after every time she would cuss me out. That would get her more mad and then it would be like a never ending cycle until she gets out of there because her heads gonna blow up haha. Just stop giving a hoot and ignore her. Almost like NC with her.