Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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This past Saturday night..

drf408

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So as I posted recently I want to break out of my passive funk. I was at a bar Sat night and decided I need to just start trying. I started up a conversation with a girl and her friends at the bar. Good results at first, I was giving her **** most of the night and she was loving it. At one point she told she had to kiss me and did. She was stuck to me the whole night. Only bought her 1 drink and that was only after she bought us a round of shots. At the end of the night she invited herself with us to go get food and leave her friends behind.

We get to the after hours restaurant we always go to. She sits down for about 5 minutes, she gets a call from her friend and says she has to take it. She told me earlier that she was having issues with one of her best friends and briefly showed me her texts as if I cared and could read it. That was it, she went outside, saw her talking on the phone, about 2 minutes later my friends and I noticed she was gone. Never came back. The rest of her friends showed up later and asked me "where is ___???" I just answered "no idea".

My theory is she was playing and has a bf who was probably unexpectedly coming to get her. I saw her friends texting her after they realized she wasn't with me and they weren't getting a response. Rookie mistake..never got a number as it seemed a guarantee. I was really irked which carried over into the next day..which is another story.

The girl was great up until that moment, however one her friends was a bi%#. Acting disinterested in everything that was going on, she sighed having to greet us. Told the girl I was with that my friend is really bothering her, he tried talking to her for all of 2 minutes realized shes not interested and left her alone. I was with 5 friends and within the first 2 minutes everyone was amazed at what a bi%# this girl was and she was cute at best. And of course the girl I was with told me that she is super sweet and nice and that my friends must have done something to her. Hate that crap.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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drf408

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Oh and a point I wanted to make was that although I was a bit irritated for a while I felt much better working it even it going the way it did than just standing around and doing nothing but looking and hoping she comes over.
 

Tiguere

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never ever ever ever take a girl to eat after the club/bar. you take her home. if she wants to go eat say your goodbyes.

i also have made this mistake numerous times.
 

drf408

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hmmm I've taken many with me but I don't buy them dinner or anything and this one didn't want anything. It's just the 2AM place where we always hit because we're starving end of the night but you are right in this case, my place is literally across the street from the bar I met her at. If was smart I would've just taken her directly there...
 

TheManOfSteel

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Indeed, if you were smart you would have been feeding her a c0ck sandwich instead of taking her to some restaurant. Chalk it up to experience. Good work on making the initial step. You can't go from zero to hero over night, this is a good step in the right direction. Next time you open and get IOIs escalate back to your place.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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